Hostile cat?

Sherrybomb

My cat HATES to be pet, picked up or cuddled at all. She usually bites or scratches me, and her tail begins wagging. I was wondering if anyone knew if there could be a specific reason for this? Could she have been mis-treated as a kitten or is it just part of her personality? I got her when she was about 6 months and I don't know anything about her previous home. She's such a beautiful cat and I love her.. I just wish I could hold her

irish1967

You are not alone. Our boy is just the same. Got him as a stray when he was about 6 months too. He's a deaf pure white and as such has very sensitive skin ( we think) and doesn't like being stroked at all. He has never jumped up on our knees to be petted etc.
Guess it could be a mistreatment when younger or maybe the skin thing. Think someone said being separated to quickly from their mother can make a cat like this also.
Wouldn't change him for the world though.

MaryK666

Some cats are just like that I'm afraid. Some will come round with a lot of time and encouragement but many never do.

We have an ex-feral male who hated to be picked up when we got him at the age of 14 months. It's taken three years but he's now a total lap cat who adores being carried round and sleeps on my head at night.

We also who have his mate of the same age and situation who adores having her belly rubbed and blown on and will lie on her back and snooze when I do it, trusing me completely. But if I try to pick her up, even to get her in the carrier for a trip to the vet, she'll claw and bite like a true feral.

It just depends on the cats personality and the more you let them decide to do things because they think it's what they want, the more likely they are to do it - if that makes sense.
Treats are always a good bribery tool. Try feeding treats while you sit on an armchair or sofa so she has to jump up beside you to get them but don't touch her. That way she'll come to learn that there's nothing to fear from being close to you and may come to do it of her own free will eventually.
It's a process of trial and error and it may take time but time and patience are your friend and you may find that your gorgeous girl will come around in her own time.

lucycat

I would agree with the other posters OP, some cats are just like that. My cat Lucy (who lives with my parents in Ireland) would take the had off you if you tried to pet her or cuddle her -she is so bad that the local vet has written 'Dangerous Animal' on her card after she clawed the hand off him badly (I do thinks thats a joke though ). She loves being around people, but just as long as they keep their distance. AFAIK, cats haven't been domesticated as long as dogs, so they tend to be a bit more independent and don't usually follow us hoomans around slavishly while looking for attention.

However, one of my cats who lives with me over here is a total nutter for hugs and kisses - if you dont rush over and pick her up and snuggle her like a baby the very second you come in, she roars and shouts until you do. Her sister Sophie on the other hand is a more stand-offish and doesnt even let the hubs touch her at all.

I wouldnt worry about your kitty OP, she sounds like she has a very loving Mammy in you and even though she might not show her affection to you through hugs and cuddles, she undoubtedly loves you too

ziggy23

Hi OP
My 2 lads are like that they HATE being picked up. Bob will come and sit on my lap to be rubbed and Benji is a bit shyer but sometimes he does come up to my face and give me a little kiss it's so cute:p They run a mile if anyone else is in the house and only show me affection. I think they were wild cats. The vet recommended I get some of this stuff http://www.feliway.com/gb/Stress-and-Cats/Stressful-situations-for-cats I havent the money to get it at the moment and it's not urgent but hopefully I can try it soon. I agree with other posters some cats are like that just dont like to be lifted.

Mistymouse

Hi OP,
Have to agree with all the comments above saying some cats are just like that. Our two are total lap cats, love being petted, belly rubs etc but neither of them will allow you to pick them up or carry them, it's just not in their nature. Just allow your cat to dictate the levels of affection for now, she may come around one day to being picked up but not all of them do.

babychuckles

ziggy23 wrote: »

Hi OP
My 2 lads are like that they HATE being picked up. Bob will come and sit on my lap to be rubbed and Benji is a bit shyer but sometimes he does come up to my face and give me a little kiss it's so cute:p They run a mile if anyone else is in the house and only show me affection. I think they were wild cats. The vet recommended I get some of this stuff http://www.feliway.com/gb/Stress-and-Cats/Stressful-situations-for-cats I havent the money to get it at the moment and it's not urgent but hopefully I can try it soon. I agree with other posters some cats are like that just dont like to be lifted.

In my experience it's cheaper to buy feliway defusers and refills from sites on the Internet from the uk than buy it at the local Irish vet. A friend is using it for months and has calmed down two feral 7month olds. Another helpful thing is are there high places that your cat can perch on that will give him confidence as ground hugging cats dont have the same advantage of lording it above us and so they are very tense. The like of cat trees can. be substituted by high bookshelves that puss can hop on to that are clear of ornaments so he gets a good space for himself.
Bc

JKM

Unfortunately, just like some human's don't particularly like hugs, some cat's don't either. Here's a run-down of my little terrors:

Ollie: Best cat in the world. Anyone (and I mean anyone) who has ever met him has commented on his great personality. He would talk to you if he could. We know exactly what he want's or needs just by his meows and body language. His favourite place in the world is on my OH's lap or tucked under the duvet with us (only as a special treat though). We could easily hoist him up on our shoulders and go about or business without any hassle.

Oscar: LOVES food. He would eat all day long if he had his way. He doesn't particularly like being held. He stiffens up when you hold him but won't struggle too much. Loves being groomed and rubbed but only if you don't crowd him. He will often hop up on the OH's lap, but doesn't stay long, especially if he gets a whiff of food. :rolleyes:

Lucy (RIP): She was definately a Jekyll and Hyde cat. So affectionate with us but hated being around other cats (except Ollie, who everyone loves!) and when she got in a mood all you could do was let her get her way. Her love of being outdoors and on her own is what unfortunately saw her demise.

Ruby: Such a beautiful cat and crazy cute with loads of personality. Loves attention, but only on her terms. You can rub her, but once she's had enough, she's had enough. Pick her up at your peril. :eek: I still do though as I can't resist her cuteness, and I have the scars to prove it. :rolleyes:

Mylo: He was totaly feral when we acquired him but is the biggest gentlest cat in the world now. He is terrified of anyone but me and my OH though, he will run away and hide for the entire time that anyone else is in the house. He doesn't have an agressive bone in his body. He loves to cuddle with us and particualrly loves to nudge our faces with his. Funnily enough though he is not a lap cat at all.

Toby (a.k.a 'little dude'): He is our smallest, 7 months old. He is a tiny bit crazy (as all kittens are). He has cerebellar hypoplasia so is a bit clumsy. He absolutely adores being cuddled and will start to purr almost as soon as you pick him up. He particularly likes to snuggle in beside my OH on the sofa, tucked in under his arm.

Sorry for the long post, but I love talking about my cats!!

OP, you will soon learn what your cat likes and doesn't like, they are all so unique.

lucycat

JKM, your cats sound adorable I love the way they have such distinct personalities and thats why (covers dogs ears) I will always prefer cats. They are such hard work in terms of trying to win their affection, but it is so worth it.

Sherrybomb

Thanks for all the replies guys! Good to know it's just part of who she is. I do love my cat, even if she rarely shows it back

Mountainsandh

Cats change too, just like people, she may surprise you some day
My own grumpy old fella (7 years so not that old either) is a lot more cuddly now than he was as a youngster. He was never a lap cat as a youngster, but he's now happy to jump up every evening for his cuddle. I'm saying grumpy by the way, because even though he's a real softie, he can also let you know in an ouchy, very clear way, that he's had enough, or he's in a bad mood (especially when woken up :o:P).

doctor evil

My cats neurosis is too deeply embedded to let me pick him up:(

He loves cuddling up on the bed beside me and on the couch.

Bullseye1

Try valerian! It drives cats mad