A story at Bedtime

jetsonx

Once upon a time, in a small hamlet called Drumcondra lived a commoner man call Bertie. He craved popularity and more importantly power. For years Bertie went around the locality chatting amicably with the locals. Eventually, Bertie got elected as leader to the townspeople. "Here behold Bertie", the townspeople would cry to which Bertie would respond "Howya Lads". Bertie would do anything for you - on one condition - you had to vote for him.

One day King Haughey called young Bertie to his court and said "you are the most cunning and devious of them all" and like an Italian Medici he took young Bertie under his wing for an apprenticeship to be a statesman like himself.

It was tough for Bertie at first, for he was still dressing like a commoner with with cheap garb such as nylon coats. But, Bertie was learning the tricks of the trade which King Haughey taught him and one day he would become like a true statesman like his master.

After many years in the court, King Haughey was found to have bizarre irregularities in his accounts and had to leave office. All the islanders booed as he left in black chariot driven by a muck savage from Leitrim.

Eventually, Bertie was crowned King of the small little Island out in the Atlantic ocean. Bertie was delighted. He got the power he craved. Bertie denounced his master as quickly as possible. Bertie has got all he could from him and now did not even want to know him.

Bertie was just coming to power at the right time. Other states in Europe, were bountiful in riches which they wanted to lend. Bertie greedily seized the opportunity. In the hamlet of Greystones, lived a little man called Seanie lived. Seanie was an accountant of only modest ability but was was a cunning entrepreneur who was running a small merchant bank. Seanie decided to borrow the money and lots of it.

Bertie was now moving among the builders, bankers, developers and merchant classes. This was all a far cry to talking to auld wans in Drumcondra. They badly needed this French and German money to build big big dwellings for the townspeople so they could make loads and loads of money. Bertie knew just the man to give them the money. For every deal they did, Bertie got tax from it. Bertie was delighted. Money was flowing in. His feelings of power were going through the roof "I will build hospitals, schools, motorways he declared to the island people". The island people were very happy. They went to the banks and asked for big big loans.

Bertie could not stop himself. All the money, all the power. But, one day Bertie got a tip-off from some of his merchant friends. There was menacing storm clouds coming from the West. Bertie knew all the islanders would be disappointed with him if he could not keep the money on tap. So, one day Bertie stood up and said "I'm off lads, see ya"...

Part II to be continued tomorrow night

Posy

I think I've heard this story before!

Cill Dara Abu

I swallowed a teabag once.

The King of Moo

Things are bad, and Bertie and his cronies did screw us, but hey...

mikom

jetsonx wrote: »

Once upon a time, in a small hamlet called Drumcondra lived a commoner man call Bertie. He craved popularity and more importantly power. For years Bertie went around the locality chatting amicably with the locals. Eventually, Bertie got elected as leader to the townspeople. "Here behold Bertie", the townspeople would cry to which Bertie would respond "Howya Lads". Bertie would do anything for you - on one condition - you had to vote for him.

One day King Haughey called young Bertie to his court and said "you are the most cunning and devious of them all" and like an Italian Medici he took young Bertie under his wing for an apprenticeship to be a statesman like himself.

It was tough for Bertie at first, for he was still dressing like a commoner with with cheap garb such as nylon coats. But, Bertie was learning the tricks of the trade which King Haughey taught him and one day he would become like a true statesman like his master.

After many years in the court, King Haughey was found to have bizarre irregularities in his accounts and had to leave office. All the islanders booed as he left in black chariot driven by a muck savage from Leitrim.

Eventually, Bertie was crowned King of the small little Island out in the Atlantic ocean. Bertie was delighted. He got the power he craved. Bertie denounced his master as quickly as possible. Bertie has got all he could from him and now did not even want to know him.

Bertie was just coming to power at the right time. Other states in Europe, were bountiful in riches which they wanted to lend. Bertie greedily seized the opportunity. In the hamlet of Greystones, lived a little man called Seanie lived. Seanie was an accountant of only modest ability but was was a cunning entrepreneur who was running a small merchant bank. Seanie decided to borrow the money and lots of it.

Bertie was now moving among the builders, bankers, developers and merchant classes. This was all a far cry to talking to auld wans in Drumcondra. They badly needed this French and German money to build big big dwellings for the townspeople so they could make loads and loads of money. Bertie knew just the man to give them the money. For every deal they did, Bertie got tax from it. Bertie was delighted. Money was flowing in. His feelings of power were going through the roof "I will build hospitals, schools, motorways he declared to the island people". The island people were very happy. They went to the banks and asked for big big loans.

Bertie could not stop himself. All the money, all the power. But, one day Bertie got a tip-off from some of his merchant friends. There was menacing storm clouds coming from the West. Bertie knew all the islanders would be disappointed with him if he could not keep the money on tap. So, one day Bertie stood up and said "I'm off lads, see ya"...

Part II to be continued tomorrow night

Ps. I love you.

hondasam

=jetsonx;[75530416]


After many years in the court, King Haughey was found to have bizarre irregularities in his accounts and had to leave office. All the islanders booed as he left in black chariot driven by a muck savage from Leitrim.

who is this ?

Wertz

Oh I wonder will the big bad IMF will come in and huff and puff and blow it all away?

nice_very

..cant wait for part 2, to see if the Islanders all lived happily ever after or were ruled by the dark lords until the end of days, or even if the bearded northern warrior was to be the knight in shining (GWO) armour

starbelgrade

Not a great story, but it would definitely put you to sleep.

Senna

Did you plagiarise that from the X-Files

the groutch

and Bertie lived happily ever after with his six figure pension

policarp

And poor Bertie never had a bank account, but luckily for him he discovered a turf accountant, where he found that the interest rates were far greater than any of the financial institutions.