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Would it bother you if your friends didn't invite or tell you about a holiday?

  • 16-11-2011 7:23pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    This isn't really a big deal but it has made me think twice about the state of my friendships. I have a small group of friends that I've known since primary school. I've been to college and we've drifted slightly but we still made regular contact. I was never really too far away. But recently I've found out that they went on a couple of holidays and I didn't even hear about it years later. I feel a little silly posting this as it makes me look like a control freak. But do you think that it's very odd that they didn't say a word to me about it at the time or afterwards? There could be good reasons why they didn't ask me but I would have really liked to have gone on them. I haven't done any travelling, it's something I feel I've missed out on. I could have a job opportunity coming up and thought about putting it off so I'd be around my friends. I know it would be stupid to do that, and I just feel so nieve now to have actually thought that.

    Do you think I'm reading too much into this?


Comments

  • #2
    baby and crumble
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,512 ✭✭✭baby and crumble


    I've only once gone on a holiday with friends as an adult, and that was with my best friend backpacking through Europe after my leaving cert. I think it'd drive me mad!

    I do think you're reading more into this than is wise, OP. Nobody is ever under any obligation to invite anyone else on a holiday. I'd probably find it weird if my friends did (I assume you mean a big, 2 week type holiday as opposed to a weekend away).

    As for the job opportunity, take it. Don't hang around for your friends, seriously. All my friends have left the country, and I think it's great. You need to broaden your horizons ('you meaning everyone) and that would be the perfect way to do it.


  • #3
    LittleBook
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,716 ✭✭✭LittleBook


    whoarefriends wrote: »
    But recently I've found out that they went on a couple of holidays and I didn't even hear about it years later.

    I think you're reading too much into your friendships. It's not at all unusual for groups within groups of friends to go on holidays together but for you not to even hear about the holidays until "years later" is, on the one hand, odd but on the other hand it simply indicates to me that you're not as close to these people as you'd like to think, I'm afraid.

    But it all really depends on the dynamics of the group. It would be unheard of for my group of friends to plan a holiday together and not include me and it would be impossible that I didn't know about it!

    Take the job and maintain your friendships as you've been doing and let your friends know that you're interested in travelling and would love to be involved in any plans they might have in the future.


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