Old School Friend, FBook & More?????

blue skye

A couple of weeks ago a Chap I knew from school become friends with me on Fbook. I'm living here in Ireland but went to school in London which is where he is still living.
Since then we have gone from messaging each other to him phoning me once or twice a day. We get on really well & he has told me that he liked me when we were kids but just never done anything about it.

The problem is he has a girlfriend who he has been seeing for about a year now but he isn't entierly happy with the way the relationship is going & isn't sure it will last the test of time. I am feeling very much like the 'other woman' but don't want to lose our friendship as I look forward to his calls. And Yes he only calls me during the day while he's at work!

He told me this morning that if I was still in London then he would definatly end his relationship to be with me but as I'm here then he thinks he will just plod along with his not so great relationship & see's what happen's.

I am feeling so confused, I really like him, we have a laugh, I feel I can talk about anything to him & he feels he can tell me anything. I have even offered him relationship advise for god sake!

Taltos

OP - you are allowing him to use you as an emotional crutch or ego boost.

Next time he calls be clear with him - you are both just mates. Your physical location is not playing a role here. If he is not happy he should end it with his GF and not abuse your friendship or string you along like this.

Take control here - if you are not happy with how this friendship is going stop it - either by talking to him and getting him to acknowledge he is being unfair or just by stopping contact. As long as you allow this to continue it will spill over into your daily life and may actually stop you from seeing available guys around you....

Miss Fluff

blue skye wrote: »

AHe told me this morning that if I was still in London then he would definatly end his relationship to be with me but as I'm here then he thinks he will just plod along with his not so great relationship & see's what happen's.

Yeah, and if his Auntie had balls she'd be his Uncle.

His lines are such cliches I am amazed you're falling for them. Wake up girl. He's looking for an ego boost. Next thing he'll be suggesting you come over to London for the weekend. You'll end up having a sleazy liaison with him in a two-bit hotel making you think you're falling for him in a big way while he goes back to his poor unsuspecting girlfriend afterwards and you're left confused and hurt as to what the hell is going on.

You've only been in touch a couple of weeks so you won't miss his calls that much. I'm sure you were getting on fine before he came along. While I understand that the attention is nice, this guy has trouble written all over him. Why would you wait in the wings for someone who a. has a girlfriend and b. lives in a different country? Tell him you're not interested and stop wasting headspace on him.

blue skye

This has been a huge ego boost to me as I've been seperated for over a year......It has already been suggested that he either comes here or I go over to London for the weekend. Not meaning to sound forward but I have suggested it as equally as he has! Looking at the practical side of things - he has already asked me if I would move back to London which I have already said no to & he has a great job in the city which I am sure he wouldn't give up to come to the country to live with me!

I know this isn't going anywhere really BUT!!! What if?????????????

holyhead

Blue Skye, I understand your excitement. I can also appreciate it has given your self esteem a boost. However I hope you listen to your head otherwise you could be setting yourself up for the mother of a fall and hence do damage to your self esteem. I guess I'm saying play it cool.

I am a friend

blue skye wrote: »

I know this isn't going anywhere really BUT!!! What if?????????????

What if his gf finds out???

He is willing to cheat on his gf with you and you think thats an ego boost?? There are plenty of nice guys out there - you dont need to take the dregs

CarMe

blue skye wrote: »

This has been a huge ego boost to me as I've been seperated for over a year......It has already been suggested that he either comes here or I go over to London for the weekend. Not meaning to sound forward but I have suggested it as equally as he has! Looking at the practical side of things - he has already asked me if I would move back to London which I have already said no to & he has a great job in the city which I am sure he wouldn't give up to come to the country to live with me!

I know this isn't going anywhere really BUT!!! What if?????????????

What if YOU were that poor girlfriend that he tells he loves and sleeps with (of course he's told you they don't have sex anymore lol)
He sounds like a sneaky sleazy man. Count your blessings that you are not the poor woman he goes home to at night after having underhand conversations aka ego boost with WOMEN on Facebook because chances are you're not the only one, this guy is an oppertunist.