Ex back in contact...Why?

LegacyUser

Hi im just looking for some guidance! My ex and i broke up 2 years ago, we broke up over something rather silly but she was fairly nasty to me when we did break up, accusing me of all sorts and basicly said she never wanted to see me again so i didnt contact her. Anyway fast forward to now and she text me the other day completely out of the blue and we had a fairly normal conversation over texts. Its been wrecking my head the last few days trying to understand why she text me. I was crazy about her when we were together and for the first few months after the break up i would have gotten back with her in a heartbeat if she had asked. Obviously over the last 2 years ive gotten over her and have recently started to see someone new ( i didnt tell me ex this as i didnt want to rub her nose in it). Ive no real intention of getting back with her because since we broke up all she seems to do is go out now at weekends and get drunk, i was never the wild party type of guy so having a girlfriend like this really doesnt appeal to me!! but anyway can anyone shed some light as to why she text? Do you think she wants us to try again?

Thanks for reading!!!

fallen01angel

Impossible to tell OP,maybe she's feeling regretful and looking for closure/forgiveness or maybe she is checking out your present situation to see if you're available.But why don't you just come straight out and ask her,ye're not friends,you've not absolutely nothing to lose?
PS does your new girlfriend know about the ex being back in touch,that's what I'd be concerned about tbh.

I am a friend

I too would ask her out straight why she is back on to you. She owes you an explanation after all this time.

I would suspect she is recently single and just being nostalgic.

Miss Fluff

Could be any number of reasons as to why she is back in touch. Could be loneliness, horniness, notalgia, drunkenness, nosiness, the need for an ego boost, the sudden compulsion to apologise....who knows.

While I understand that this is potentially unsettling, if you're happy with your new girlfriend then I would just ignore correspondence. You're over the hurt that this girl caused and is there really any reason to go and open up old wounds?

floorpie

She wouldn't know that you've just gotten into a relationship would she? I know girls and guys who contact ex's of theirs, out of the blue, like clockwork, whenever something...piques their interest on facebook (e.g. other girls/guys commenting, relationship statuses changing etc). Whether she wants to get back together or not isn't really relevant if you're happy now, right?

foxyboxer

There is the possibility that a colleague of hers could have seen you out and about with your new girlfriend and mentioned this to her. She could be texting you for clarification of this.

Why not just state/text the obvious. "Why are you texting me?"

silly

She is txting you because you have a girlfriend.
Simple as that.

I was my husbands first serious relationship after he broke up with his ex 6 yrs previous.

They would often bump into eachother out but the conversation would never pass "hi how are you".

She really broke his heart and she knew it.
Then, he starts seeing me. He meets her out and she asks him was he seeing anyone, he told her about me ( I know her for years too)

Que the txts, phone calls etc.
She went out of her way to speak to him every chance she got when out. She would txt him and ring him in the middle of the night. He was flattered at first and would txt her back, until it became obvious that she wanted one thing... For us to break up and get him to be pining over her again...

She almost succeeded in breaking us up.

Cut all contact with this girl. She is only contacting you as she sees that you are moving on.
Nothing can be gained by continuing to txt her back.... Only a very pissed off and hurt girlfriend.

LegacyUser

I agree with silly's post above. I guess the question is - do you still have feelings for her? How long are you with your new girlfriend and how do you feel about her? I would guess that your ex has found out through mutual friends or maybe she saw you both out one night so she is craving your attention once more.

It's not really fair on your GF now for you to still be in contact. You could be putting this relationship in jeopardy and for what - an ego boost for your ex?

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies guys. Ive been going out with my new girlfriend for about 3 months now so its going well bt still in the early stages and as said above i dont want to jeoperdise it just to give my ex an ego boost!! I certainly wont be texting her again and if she texts me il ask her straight out why she is texting me.

From what i could sense in the texts she did send, i dont think she new i had a girlfriend but she was keen to find out what was going on in my life.

What really wrecked my head was how she could be so nice over the texts after the way we had broken up, it was like we were just friends casually texting!!

Should i tell my girlfriend that she has been in touch? I dont really see much point in annoying her with it?

Anyway, thanks again for all the advice.