Trying to abstain

sandmanporto

I have recently been turned down a job because word of my alcohol problem got to the boss who was viewing the cv's.
I had been in treatment for 1 month to get off alcohol and I recently learned that a gossip in the doctors surgery let it slip to her boyfriend who is best friends with the boss of the company I applied to. I have slipped back to alcohol tonight.
I am gonna die if i dont get a job! I need help.
im so sorry i hate being like this. i have 2 degrees and loads of experience and all i have is me alone and my ****ing cat!
i need advice because i have the courage to talk now and i dont when not drinking. people are mean as hell and when i drink i can escape that. i am highly educated and can't get work.
i am ashamed of myself i hate myself

MrsStuffings

just take it a day at a time.

get free from the grip of the alcohol vice.

wake up and make the decision that you are not going to drink anymore.

you need to seek professional help again if feasible.

CDfm

sandmanporto wrote: »

I have recently been turned down a job because word of my alcohol problem got to the boss who was viewing the cv's.
I had been in treatment for 1 month to get off alcohol and I recently learned that a gossip in the doctors surgery let it slip to her boyfriend who is best friends with the boss of the company I applied to.

How do you know this.

I have slipped back to alcohol tonight.

That is not clever. Are you sure you are not using it as an excuse.

I mean everytime the **** hits the fan you will need to be able to cope or you wont cope in a job.

Frowzy

CDfm wrote: »

How do you know this.




That is not clever. Are you sure you are not using it as an excuse.

I mean everytime the **** hits the fan you will need to be able to cope or you wont cope in a job.

I don't drink, but if I did I don't imagine your well intentioned words would help!

Firstly, I have to ask if this gossip works in your GP's? If she does you need to comPlain directly to your GP! You are trying to get help but because of her meddling you've been unable to move on. A taste of her own medicine might make her think twice next time, you're entitled to confidentiality when you visit your GP.

I sympathise with your situation.... It must be really frustrating to have spent so long on your education and not make use of it. Two degrees is very impressive, however I imagine that some employers might think you overqualified and that you might move on quickly. I suggest that you tailor your CV to suit the position you're allpying for, perhaps only mentioning the degree most relevant to the job you're applying for.

Has your drinking affected your work in the past? Do employers have reason to worry? Or are you just a social drinker? From your post it seems you have identified that you have a problem, that's the first step. Are all your friends heavy drinkers? Do you have other interests that you can immerse yourself in when you feel the need for a drink? Exercise can give you a high. Have you tried running or going to the gym?

What about more study? A masters or PhD?

You definitely need to find something to replace the drink long term, otherwise you will slip back everytime you have a setback.

Best of Luck OP. Keep us updated x

CDfm

I didnt mean to sound harsh but if the op has been harmed by the gossip he may be able to sue the practice ? Thats why I asked how he knows.

So he needs to get his facts straight as he has a right to condidentiality at the doctors.

Also, while jobs are scarce, he cant use every hiccup as an excuse.

If the problem is loneliness/boredom than deal with that by getting involved in life.

tenchi-fan

CDfm wrote: »

That is not clever. Are you sure you are not using it as an excuse.

+1
Work can be stressful and every week there'll be a new excuse to hit the bottle.

mrmorgan

sandmanporto wrote: »

I have recently been turned down a job because word of my alcohol problem got to the boss who was viewing the cv's.
I had been in treatment for 1 month to get off alcohol and I recently learned that a gossip in the doctors surgery let it slip to her boyfriend who is best friends with the boss of the company I applied to. I have slipped back to alcohol tonight.
I am gonna die if i dont get a job! I need help.
im so sorry i hate being like this. i have 2 degrees and loads of experience and all i have is me alone and my ****ing cat!
i need advice because i have the courage to talk now and i dont when not drinking. people are mean as hell and when i drink i can escape that. i am highly educated and can't get work.
i am ashamed of myself i hate myself

I know where you are coming from. When I was in AA someone spoke of me there and everyone was talking. It shouldn't if bother me but it did. Needless to say I drank again and it got worse and worse

Sunnyisland

I think this is a really good tool I found on a website called Innergold - they treat all types of addiction:

Before acting on a trigger or temptation discipline yourself to review the 10
Commandment Questions of Relapse Prevention. Commit them to memory and let
them be a guiding force in your life.

The Ten Commandment Questions of Relapse Prevention

1) Will acting on this temptation bring me long-term satisfaction or instant gratification?
2) What will be the end result if I act on this temptation?
3) If I choose to act on this temptation will it make my life better or worse?
4) Do I take 100% responsibility for my own actions or do I blame others and make excuses?
5) Can the addicted part of my brain force me to act out against my will?
6) Is there a part of me that wants to walk away from this?
7) Can I choose to follow that part that wants to walk away?
8) Is there a feeling of peace that will come to me if I walk away?
9) Would I feel better about myself tomorrow if I didn’t act out today?
10) Will I honor the rational part of my brain that is encouraging me to walk away from this
temptation?

One can positively direct ones mind by learning to ask the right questions.

Amtmann

Recovery style threads not permitted.