Girlfriend has No confidence driving after crash - what to do?

Zascar

My girlfriend was unlucky enough to have two crashes over the past few months. One was clearly her fault as she lost control in heavy rain and ended up on the other side and got struck on the passenger side. The other was debateable, but she ended up losing the claim. Before this she was a very good driver - confident, competent, didn't have a lot of bad habbits the average driver has. However, now all has changes and she's very nervous on the roads. She's driving a different car now which is different, and she's very nervous. She was never a speeder before but she went a reasonable pace near enough the limit. Now she's driving what I consider to be dangerously slow at times. Yes I know "It's a speed limit not a target" but when you are doing half the limit and people are screaming past you, its not good driving practice. She questions things that she used to know and generally does not enjoy driving any more.

Has anyone had this before, and what's the best thing to do about it? I would like her to get some lessons but not sure how she'll react to this. Also not sure which instructors would be good for this type of thing - its not the same as trying to get someone to pass a test.

Thought and comments welcome, thanks.

JP 1800

Lessons would be a good idea, but go the route of advanced driving lessons and say it is for defensive driving to enable her to better react to other road users. My sister had the same problem but she just go over it.

JP 1800

Also a good friend of mine is a very good instructor, he is in his mid 20s and is more patient than some of the older instructors and comes across very well, pm me if you want his details

Atomic Pineapple

Will just take time until she gets her confidence back, until then encourage her as much as you can and don't let her make excuses up for not driving. Getting straight back on the horse and all that.

Obviously if she is driving dangerously slow encourage her to speed up a bit or take her to quieter roads so she can build her confidence up again to be able to drive at a reasonable speed.

Mongarra

Just tell her to cop herself on and get on with it. Women react very well to things like that!









Lessons are a good idea. A friend of mine was in a similar position and bought the advanced lessons as a present for his partner and she came out of it all a better driver.

biko

I'd say it a pretty normal reaction after having two collisions like that. Hopefully she'll get back into it again soon. As said earlier, have her do most of the driving and every time she drives without incident will be a small victory.

corktina

Mongarra wrote: »

Just tell her to cop herself on and get on with it. Women react very well to things like that!

:eek: there speaks a brave almost certainly single or divorced man

Bearcat

corktina wrote: »

:eek: there speaks a brave almost certainly single or divorced man

I'll support that man too....Molly coddling them is a waste of space....they'll stay stuck in time......id get her a driving instructor for a couple of goes to get her back in the saddle and get the confidence up.

Hope it works out.

Ps....I'd also get her to drive by the same spot where she had her accidents just to banish those demons

Anan1

JP 1800 wrote: »

Lessons would be a good idea, but go the route of advanced driving lessons and say it is for defensive driving to enable her to better react to other road users. My sister had the same problem but she just go over it.

+1. I'd suggest doing the IAM course/test, but I wouldn't put pressure on her if she's not ready.

mondeo

I guess after having 2 accidents in a short period of time who could blame her for loosing some confidence. It's easy for people to say just make her get back out there etc. My cousin years back lost confidence in driving after an accident. If it's any interest to you I know a lad very well who works with people to boost their self confidence in all sorts of situations.

corktina

i thought my car was fully loaded...but it doesnt have a saddle:)

Gary ITR

What was she doing out of the kitchen anyway?


Seriously though don't put the girl under any pressure, I'm sure with time the confidence will return, just let her potter about at her own pace until then, it will take some time though

Jimmy Bottlehead

I had two accidents in three weeks when I started driving in Dublin (bloody culchie), and they really do knock the wind out of your driving confidence. I hated the thought of driving anywhere that wasn't deserted.

Just encourage her to keep driving. It will definitely take time, but the confidence will return.
She just needs to trust her abilities, and to realise that accidents do happen, and they're ok once everybody is alright and a lesson is learned. If she knows what went wrong, and she's stopped doing it, the accidents are warranted.

Geekness1234

Get a butcher knife pretend to cut food,and slice your finger to sh!t and run around screaming in a high pitched voice that you need to go to the hospital.Problem solved.

Master and commander

Maybe you can go out for a few drives together in quiet areas or at night when its quiet so she'll be more at ease. Eventually she will get over it.