Another "why hasnt he contacted me" thread

LegacyUser

Feeling very sorry for myself at the moment. Honestly dont understand fellas.

Maybe Ive been a bit too eager, but thought he was genuinely nice. Few weeks ago he suggests to meet up, but I couldnt. So, I said what about meeting this weekend (was that coming across as too eager?) and he said ok. All of a sudden he is busy, got this to do, got that to do. Work is hard etc etc. Will contact me to arrange it. But obviously have heard nothing. Maybe the title of my thread is self anwering - Its clear that he is not interested, but its like a kick it the nuts (if I had them).

I think am feeling a little hurt, as I thought he was a genuinely nice guy.

Anyone ever find themselves in this situation? Am I over reacting?

Miss Fluff

How many dates have you been on already? How did they go? Did you meet him online?

LegacyUser

Met him a couple of times. He text Sat and asked if I wanted to go for dinner (was like an hours notice) and I couldnt anyways! So I suggested we meet up again soon - he was like when - I said tuesday would suit. He says fine. Then a few hours later says he doesnt think he can (queue more excuses). Says will get back to me about it, but havent heard a word!
Am I encouraged because he wanted to go for dinner, or am I let down because he choose to not contact me about meeting? Can anyone put some perspective on this? Feel like a bit of a fool to be honest. This keeps happening (yes well meet up and then hear nothing from him). I guess plain and simple if a guy was interested, they would let you know?

Tigger99

I'm sorry that you are feeling like this op. I don't think that you should put much stead in him contacting you for dinner if he only gave u an hrs notice. I'm sorry to have to say this but maybe his original plans fell through, and he contacted u at short notice because of this.:o

Trust me on this, but when u meet the right guy he wont keep you second guessing or not contacting you.

Miss Fluff

anotheroneofthose wrote: »

He text Sat and asked if I wanted to go for dinner (was like an hours notice)

An hours notice? How VERY dare he.

Don't waste a second more on him.

Trigger75

Sounds like someone I know. his name doesn't begin with I does it?

A guy doesn't treat a girl like that if he likes her.
Its unfortunate you got caught in his attention seeking game but give up on him now.

I am a friend

Yeah op it sounds like you are his standby

Taltos

Trigger75 - welcome to PI/RI.
I appreciate you are new here however we must insist that posters to PI/RI only respond in compliance with our charter.

If you have not already done so please review the charter and also review a number of threads to get a flavour for this forum before posting again. Further posts in breach of our charter will result in warnings/infractions and/or bans.

Tigger99 - less of the textspeak please.

Taltos

Emme

Trigger75 wrote: »

Sounds like someone I know. his name doesn't begin with I does it?

or "H"? I know somebody like that whose names begins with "H".

Seriously OP, it's rotten when that happens. I met somebody a while back who was similar, made allowances for him and ended up getting really hurt. My excuse is that I hadn't been on a date in a long time tjhat I was glad to be asked out that I put up with the bad treatment. It wasn't worth it.

Text him and tell him you're fed up of his vacillating and that he's not to contact you again.

KTRIC

Sounds awfully like a woman I know. We went out for a couple of dates, dinner. The odd kiss. Then nothing. She'd email me but I think she just likes the attention but nothing else.

Don't waste your time on him OP. He's obviously not into you.

LegacyUser

anotheroneofthose wrote: »

He text Sat and asked if I wanted to go for dinner (was like an hours notice) and I couldnt anyways!

If you've just started seeing someone new and you're really into him/her, you make sure that you organise a date with him/her early enough in the week before he/she makes plans for the weekend.

Texting you an hour before he wanted to meet you does not sound like he's all that keen, more that he's looking for a f*ck buddy. If he tries that again, give him short shrift for contacting you at such short notice. If he gets thick because you call him on it, he's not a genuine person and is annoyed that you called him on his sh*tty behaviour.

LegacyUser

It does sound like he after one think I admit.
You know the tale as old as time "thought we had a connection" blah blah blah.
It just doesnt feel very nice - its like being let down.
Am definitely not going to be contacting him again (even to tell him not to contact me). The lack of contact and respect speaks volumes in itself. Hot cold hot cold. Its messing with my head, so I will just have to get over it. No choice.

Greaney

Yah know, the best advice I ever gave myself was to imagine I was my best friend/ Mum/ sister, and when I met a bloke I would ask myself 'would I try and set them up with my friend?', 'Is this person good enough for someone I love and admire?' (that person being me).

I wasn't the best judge of character before and I didn't make great choices on the man front in the past but ..I began to up my standards a bit and I understood that when I picked eejit boyfriends my friends who love me and cherish me worried for me. They had much higher standards for me.

We'd all rather see our friends single, happy and healthy, than tied down by some fool who destroys their self confidence and doesn't cherish them.

I'm married to a guy now who's cute, slightly bald, geeky (those ones always age rather well actually), copped on and terrific at DIY. I was in my late thirties and had a teen son when I met him:rolleyes: