Gold Smoking poo

blaze1

Just saw this.... I know times are hard for everyone, this is gold tho

http://www.independent.ie/national-news/courts/man-who-tried-to-turn-his-faeces-into-gold-is-jailed-2911748.html

A Northern Ireland man who tried to turn his own faeces into gold by putting it on an electric heater has been jailed for three months.

The bizarre experiment, carried out by Paul Moran, 30, caused around £3,000 worth of damage to his Housing Executive home in a block of flats at Derrin Park in Enniskillen in July.

Upon his release he will spend a further 12 months on licence.

Moran admitted arson and endangering the lives of others.

His Honour Judge McFarland told him: “Rather bizarrely you were attempting to make gold from human faeces and waste products.

“It was an interesting experiment to fulfil the alchemist’s dream, but wasn’t going to succeed.”

While outlining the circumstances of the case at Enniskillen Magistrates Court, prosecuting counsel Robin Steer, told those present that at 7.12pm on July 24 last year the Fire Brigade was called to Moran’s flat at Derrin Park in Cornagrade, Enniskillen.

A police officer who was at the scene overheard Moran tell someone he had put “fertiliser” on a heater.

Moran’s barrister, Des Fahy, agreed that the general circumstances of the case were bizarre. He said Moran was a man of considerable intellectual ability but there was a clear problem over the years relating to drug abuse.

The judge noted that Moran was now on anti-psychotic medication and agreed with the findings of a pre-sentence report, which said he did not pose “a significant risk of serious harm

El Weirdo

Shit!

FatherLen

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SeaFields

That fella came top of his science class me thinks.

orourkeda

He must have turned his brains to sh1t instead

Conall Cernach

Apparently it was his turd attempt at it.

Jesus Wept

In before Flutt.

AnonoBoy

What a sh*t alchemist.

mathie

Conall Cernach wrote: »

Apparently it was his turd attempt at it.

Poo-r.

jester77

He could have been stinking rich

bnt

AnonoBoy wrote: »

What a sh*t alchemist.

I'm betting he read Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, looked up "Philosopher's Stone" on Wikipedia, and thought "hey, I can do that". :pac:

CardBordWindow

Sounds like bull-****!

aidan24326

I'm surprised they jailed him though. Surely it's psychiatric treatment he needs rather than prison.

some random drunk

Dame you Blaze1, I just read that story and came here to start a thread on it!:mad:

Obligatory smart arse comment: He should have gotten someone else to do his dirty work!

cml387

He may not have created gold but to paraphrase Blackadder, he may have created purest Brown

aidan_dunne

Making gold from sh!t? Nothing new here, sure haven't the likes of Simon Cowell and Louis Walsh been managing to do it for years!

aujopimur

Crappy story.

irishejit

I actually know this bloke and I don't know where they get the part about his intellect.

As posted earlier the poor fella needs physciatric help, and anyone round here that knows him would wholeheartedly agree......not that it makes it any less funny!

Saila

sh*t stirrer

Mike 1972

blaze1 wrote: »

He said Moran was a man of considerable intellectual ability

Does not compute

on the other hand John Logie Baird (one of the contenders for title of "inventor of television") once got sacked from the Glasgow electric power company for shorting out the entire city's mains supply while trying to make diamonds.