Confused about wedding officiants/solemnisers

LeeHoffmann

Hi all,

Just a simple question. How do you go about getting an officiant/solemniser/person to marry you for a civil wedding? I googled it and downloaded a list of solemnisers (separated into counties etc) but they all seem to be Rev xyz or V Rev xyz and they seem to represent some religion or other. Not looking for a priest/reverend/whatever - I thought the officiants would represent the state/hse, not a particular religion? I'm confused. Can anyone shed some light on this?

Moonbeam

Ring your local hse civil marriage office . You need to register your intent to marry with them anyway.
They also have registrars that travel to venues but not at weekends.
http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/Find_a_Service/bdm/Find_your_Civil_Registration_Office/Civil%20Registrars.html

Betty Draper

it can be really difficult to get a HSE Solominiser (they are booked up until September 2012)

but these people also do civil services http://spiritualceremonies.ie/?page_id=10

tinkerbell

Betty Draper wrote: »

it can be really difficult to get a HSE Solominiser (they are booked up until September 2012)

but these people also do civil services http://spiritualceremonies.ie/?page_id=10

HSE Solomonisers are NOT booked up until September 2012 - this is false information. They might be already booked up for popular days such as Fridays but that doesn't mean that they are unavailable for every day of the week until September 2012.

OP - ring up your civil registration office.

Homer

How much should one cost, whether from the HSE or elsewhere? Have been quoted almost 400.00!

Betty Draper

tinkerbell wrote: »

HSE Solomonisers are NOT booked up until September 2012 - this is false information. They might be already booked up for popular days such as Fridays but that doesn't mean that they are unavailable for every day of the week until September 2012.

OP - ring up your civil registration office.

When I rang the Civil Registration Office last week, this is what I was told before they even asked the date

Ours is costing 375e + travelling expenses.

Wouldnt mind getting in to this Solomoniser busines myself, seems like great money.

The person doing ours has 4 others before us!!

Gatica

If you want a pure civil ceremony, you can either:
1) contact the HSE registrar's office local to the reception where you want to get married. If this is the same as your home area, then just your local one would do.
2) get a non-HSE solemniser that can do a legal ceremony anywhere/anytime, currently (as far as I know) only they guys from spiritualceremonies.ie do these.

It is possible that the HSE registrar office that Betty Draper contacted is booked out until September 2012 (seems highly unlikely all 5 days a week for every week until then are booked out, but possible). That is not to mean that ALL HSE registrars for all of Ireland are booked out, so just contact the one that's nearest to the venue where you want to get married. They only work Monday to Friday, and in some locations may even have a stricter schedule.

The solemnisers from spiritualceremonies.ie do in fact belong to a "spiritual" organisation, but are not against doing weddings for people outside of their organisation or who don't hold their beliefs. If it would bother you that they hold some kind of "spiritual" beliefs, then don't book them; if you simply want a legal wedding and don't really care how you come by it, then do by all means look into booking them. We've booked them because we wanted a legal wedding on our wedding day and didn't want any mention of religion or spirit world at our ceremony and they were able to accommodate that.

The excel spreadsheet that you (OP LeeHoffmann) downloaded from the HSE website simply lists ALL people in ALL of Ireland who can legally perform wedding ceremonies, whether civil, spiritual or religious. Every single priest that can perform weddings is listed on it, as well as every HSE registrar. You'll also find Tom Colton from spiritualceremonies.ie listed on it.

LeeHoffmann

Thank you Gatica. That was very helpful. Do you know whether you can decide the content of a HSE civil ceremony - i.e. can you choose the readings, poems, songs, wording of vows or is there a set script like with religious ceremonies?

Gatica

I'm not going that route so can't give entirely accurate information. However, from what I understand is you can extend the basic legal ceremony to about 20 or 30 minutes with readings and songs. They must not contain any religious references, or at least that's what I've heard. So you can do poems but not biblical readings.

From what I remember reading on other forums, some registrars have set the limit on number of songs during a ceremony to 8, but I can't imagine why it's that specific number. I think some registrars can be more flexible than others, while one may want to get out as soon as possible and be stringent on only doing a 3.30pm ceremony (hypothetically, however this was the time I was told by a hotel recommending the HSEs from Dublin), another may accommodate and be happy to stick around longer or come at an earlier time.

It's really a matter of making contact with the one that you think will be doing your ceremony.
The legal part of the vows will only be:
1. you do not know of any impediment as to why you may not marry
2. you take him/her as your lawful spouse.
After that, I'm sure you can do anything within reason (and within 4 walls, when it comes to the HSE :P )

tinkerbell

Betty Draper wrote: »

When I rang the Civil Registration Office last week, this is what I was told before they even asked the date

Ours is costing 375e + travelling expenses.

Wouldnt mind getting in to this Solomoniser busines myself, seems like great money.

The person doing ours has 4 others before us!!

That is so so so strange That really is! I know couples who have checked out the civil registration office quite recently and they were able to get dates for next summer, granted most of the Fridays were gone but Mon-Thurs were usually free. Also maybe look at a solemniser closer to the venue, to see if they are available.

It's quite possible though that when you rang they were referring to Fridays all booked up since that would be the most popular day. Sounds very strange though

morninwood

hi all,

i want to get a civil ceremony in the registrar's office but have no idea how to select the solemniser.
can i just pop into the registrar's office when i have the appointment and see with the registrar which solemniser is available on any given day?
i really don't care who the solemniser is.
also, the guidelines say that you have to let the registrar know in which venue the 'ceremony' will take place. can i just tell them that it will be the registrar's office?

cheers,
dan

newtothis

If you give them a ring with your date they can tell you if they have anyone available to do it for you, and they will book it in for you, this is what i did, and they told us to come in after xmas to register intent to marry.