Tricky Situation..what do i do?

james196

I'm looking for advice.

I'm single and i work in finance and there's a female colleague who i get on quite well with. I was considering asking her out in the not too distant future but something has come up in the meantime.

Previously i had established that she was in fact single, but recently i accidently came across a picture of her on Facebook with another guy.

I was accepting a friend request from another colleague when i noticed this girl was one of his friends so i was inqusitive- and came across this particular picture.

Now here's the dilemma- i can recall seeing this guy before with her in other local pictures, but i'm almost certain that he was just one of her friends from her home-town, and she was in fact stating herself as single.

The picture in question shows them standing together and he has his arm around her, it looks like a friends function and the impression it gives is that they are friends. My problem now is how do i know if it's romantic or not? Obviously i don't.

Anyway for me to discreetly establish that she's single, without embarassing myself if she's already involved with someone- i.e this chap.

I don't want to make an idiot of myself. Thanks.

coolcat63

Good lord. Just ask her out. It's not a job interview or a proposal. If she had a photo with her arm around a female friend you won't assume she was a lesbian, would you??

Good luck...but do step away from FB occasionally

Kadongy

I wouldn't ask a colleague out. Seems inappropriate to me. Also could cause unnecessary difficult situations. I've seen it cause a lot of difficult situations.

You are stressed over something silly before you've even asked her. This attitude greatly incresases the possibility of difficult situations. So (regardless whether you think it's inappropriate or not) I think you personally would be better off leaving it off.

gmac102

my fb pic is a male frnd with his arm around me, and im single and hes just a frnd


ask her out, what have you got to lose....think what can you gain

Tricia1

(Directed to other posters- not the OP)

A picture of a girl with more than likely a male friend automatically translates into a 'FB relationship' going on?

Silverfish

Please keep replies on-topic and helpful to the OP.

Please read the charter.

Thanks.

Tricia1

Just a couple of points-

Asking a colleague out is no problem at all, if there is attraction between both parties. Believe it or not plenty of people meet their other half at work.

I agree with the above, automatically assuming there is a sexual relationship between this girl and her male friend is wrong- most certainly not helpful to the OP.

CorsetRibbons

Go ahead and ask her out. Don't read too much into anything you see or read on facebook. She can only say yes or no...and at least then you'll know go for it. Life is awfully short.

michael19

Hi OP, here's my take on your situation.

My gut feeling is that she's genuinely good friends with the guy you saw in the picture with her.

You've already alluded to the fact that you established that she was single and you had seen this guy in other pictures with her from where she lived etc (so she was single even with this guy in the photos)

I think what's happened there is that they've attended a function, run into each other again/ other people/friends and pictures have been taken.

She obviously decided that she liked this particular picture so she posted it as her main Facebook picture.

You've already alluded to the fact that you get on well with her so it's highly likely that she likes you.

My thinking is that the guy she is in the picture with happens to be a good friend of hers- i wouldn't read anything into the fact he has his arm around her. Genuine friends do that.

Silverfish

Stop re-regging to post the same thread over and over.