Maximum age difference in a relationship.

MC.ISF

My brother who is was 21 in May of this year was telling me this evening about this girl he likes.Shes a local girl, She just turned 18 in june of this year. I personally dont know her but I know my brother is a good guy through and through so I imagine shes nice and he has good taste so Im sure shes nice. What do you guys think ? Is 18 and 21 too big of an age gap? would her parents be cautious?? I know age doesnt really matter a whole lot its only 3 years , thats ok if your both in your 20's or older. But I duno myself even if I should advise him to forget about her or what? thanks

Kadongy

no. Not your business either tbh.

coolcat63

She's quite possibly more mature than he is ...

But really, why are you asking? It's his life, let him live it. Don't interfere.

Firetrap

They're both adults so they're doing nothing wrong. Besides, it's his life not yours. Stay out of it.

tenchi-fan

First, how's this a personal issue for YOU!

Second, no, that's not a big age difference at all.

MC.ISF

Because hes MY brother and he came to ME for advise and I didnt know what to tell him so i thought id ask on here

I am a friend

MC.ISF wrote: »

Because hes MY brother and he came to ME for advise and I didnt know what to tell him so i thought id ask on here

Tell him it's only a problem if he makes it one.

Ickle Magoo

I think baring in mind the girl hasn't agreed to any kind of relationship - worrying about parental approval is perhaps a little premature.

I don't think 18 & 21 is very big age gap anyway - depending on the maturity of the individuals, of course - after all, there can be anything up to a two years age gap between classmates in school.

starlit

It depends, I would think that if she were any younger than 18 and your brother in his 20's I be a bit wary though its not a massive age gap just that they be in different stages in their lives and might want different things. A lot of it depends on maturity. I wouldn't have a major issue for an 18 and 21 year old's getting together but any other wider age gap than that when one is still in their teens and other in their 20's could prove a bit iffy. It all depends on the people involved really.

Parents will always be cautious no matter what the age gap but in these circumstances they probably will be but don't worry too much about it, making a good impression on them from the start is best and I don't think your brother will have much to worry about if he is a nice and sound guy.

Experience can vary too and so on that kind of thing can become an issue you know. I think if your brother likes her then he should go for it and ask her out. She is practically an adult its up to her to decide. Its not an unsual age gap three years. By the time she is in her 20's that age gap will close in even further. I be a lot more sceptical if there was like a 5 to 10 or more years between them.

If they take on the relationship in a healthy manner with a good attitude it shouldn't be a problem if they click, get on well together, share things in common, have chemistry and not just be friends but be lovers kind of thing then your brother has nothing to loose.

It's not your choice to make Op, its your brother's so its his choice what ever he decides regarding the girl he likes and whether or not he wants to pursue her its up to him not you! You can advise him but try not to influence his decision too much as its really up to him to make that decision for himself.

Though I wouldn't try to meddle into his love life unless you get a bad vibe from the relationship or something if you think you be concerned in anyway let him know but be there for him for what ever happens! We won't know if things can happen with her unless he don't try! Life is about enjoying once self and taking risks despite life being a roller-coaster ride and don't' know what can happen around the corner we just need to live life to the full and achieve and accomplish as much as well can in life! Life is about living isn't it!

MC.ISF

doovdela wrote: »

It depends, I would think that if she were any younger than 18 and your brother in his 20's I be a bit wary though its not a massive age gap just that they be in different stages in their lives and might want different things. A lot of it depends on maturity. I wouldn't have a major issue for an 18 and 21 year old's getting together but any other wider age gap than that when one is still in their teens and other in their 20's could prove a bit iffy. It all depends on the people involved really.

Parents will always be cautious no matter what the age gap but in these circumstances they probably will be but don't worry too much about it, making a good impression on them from the start is best and I don't think your brother will have much to worry about if he is a nice and sound guy.

Experience can vary too and so on that kind of thing can become an issue you know. I think if your brother likes her then he should go for it and ask her out. She is practically an adult its up to her to decide. Its not an unsual age gap three years. By the time she is in her 20's that age gap will close in even further. I be a lot more sceptical if there was like a 5 to 10 or more years between them.

If they take on the relationship in a healthy manner with a good attitude it shouldn't be a problem if they click, get on well together, share things in common, have chemistry and not just be friends but be lovers kind of thing then your brother has nothing to loose.

It's not your choice to make Op, its your brother's so its his choice what ever he decides regarding the girl he likes and whether or not he wants to pursue her its up to him not you! You can advise him but try not to influence his decision too much as its really up to him to make that decision for himself.

Though I wouldn't try to meddle into his love life unless you get a bad vibe from the relationship or something if you think you be concerned in anyway let him know but be there for him for what ever happens! We won't know if things can happen with her unless he don't try! Life is about enjoying once self and taking risks despite life being a roller-coaster ride and don't' know what can happen around the corner we just need to live life to the full and achieve and accomplish as much as well can in life! Life is about living isn't it!

Thanks thats great advice ! I guess as the big bro I dont want him getting into any kind of trouble or reputation thanks alot that really helped !

starlit

MC.ISF wrote: »

Thanks thats great advice ! I guess as the big bro I dont want him getting into any kind of trouble or reputation thanks alot that really helped !

No problem.:)

Neyite

There was 20 years between my parents. Now thats an age gap.:D

It was a relationship that was loving and strong throughout all their lives and an inspiration to me when I was younger and doubting that true love existed. If I can be half as happy as they were, I will be doing well.

starlit

Wow great on you neyite, it is an inspiration. I do know of a couple who had nearly a 25 year age gap but had a huge family. It worked out for them! Though there is a couple I know of who had less than a 15 year age gap but didn't work out I don't know whether it was it that they were both naive I don't know. There was a lot more issues than just the age gap but I think the age gap contributed to their differences.

irishgal2012

Completely depends on the people involved, I was in a relationship when I was 16 with a 21 year old guy-turned out he was more immature than me after a year or so and it ended badly! I did lie to my parents at first about his age until they got to know him! It did put me off older men though! Im now married to a man thats 6 weeks younger than me but we're on the same level!! My sister has been very happily married to a man 19 years older than her for the past 15 years and while it was difficult at first for other people to accept it, they have proved everyone wrong!! 3 years is not a big age gap at all though, I wouldnt worry about it at all!

Colonel_McCoy

thats nothing!!!

fungun

the divide by 2 and add 7 rule is a half-decent rule of thumb if you are very worried. They pass.

Vicxas

Im 25 and my girlfriend is 20, so no.

They're both consenting adults and both of the legal age, so nothing else really matters. There was a 5 year age gap between my most recent ex and I - she's 21, I'm 26, so 18-21 is nothing.