How to have wedding with not much money

lifeandtimes

Hey everyone,

not so much a relationship issue as im looking for advice and ideas,mods feel free to change if not the right area..

My girlfriend and i have been together for over a year and we love each other dearly,we both know that we are made for each other and want to spend the rest of our lives together and i want to give her to most amazing wedding she could ever have dreamed about,only problem is the price of it..
We are still undecided on how we want to do our wedding due to this problem...you know..should we just take up and get married somewhere abroad just the two of us or shall we scrimp and save for years to afford a big wedding with all are family and friends that kinda one...but i know secretly she would love a fancy one with all our family and friends i can just tell so what im asking is how do people afford a wedding these days?..neither of us are on great money at the moment and im almost certain we wont get a loan and im wondering does anyone have any ideas how i can give my amazing girlfriend the most amazing day of her life with not too much money...any ideas and advice would be great.

Thanks LT

trio

It can be done a lot cheaper, but you have to be imaginative.

Shop around in hotels - many will have discounts on unpopular days, such as Mondays.

Ditch hire cars - just use family cars. They never get seen much and cost a bomb for feck all.

Ditch photographer/videographer. Get a family friend with a decent camera to take some pics as his wedding present to you. Print them out yourselves in the Kodak shop and buy an album in Easons. If you know someone with a video camera & tripod, ask if they'll set it up at the side of the altar. That's a couple of thousand saved right there. We did that and guess what? They look exactly the same as professional pics - with digital cameras there's damn all difference, tbh.

Ditch a band. They cost over a grand and only play for a couple of hours. We had the DJ all night instead. He was brilliant and it ended up costing a grand less.

Buy bridesmaids dresses from the American sites, such as Dessy. Fraction of the price. Or in the Debenhams sale.

Wedding dresses are getting much more affordable now, as many shops like Monsoon do beautiful ones for about 250/300 quid as opposed to 1,500. Ditto bridal shoes - the "real" ones start at 100 quid, but you can get wedding shoes much less in Next or Barratts.

Don't hire suits - just wear your work suit with a shiny "occasion" tie. Nobody notices as long as you look prim and proper.

That's all I can think of right now. Remember that as long as people get a meal and a dance, they don't notice much else.

The Princess Bride

No matter how amazing a day you wish to give this amazing woman- just remember this- it's the life you both have together after the day that's worth investing in ,and nobody wants to do that with a huge debt hanging over their heads.

You can have a simple ceremony just both families and then a huge party afterwards on a very small budget.(Follow Trio's advice)

We had a civil ceremony followed by meal and party- not because we didn't have money- but because we're probably way too sensible for our own good:o- but we enjoyed it:) .
The only people this wedding will really mean anything to in a few months/years/decades is you two- so do what you want and enjoy, and check out the Weddings forum.

I am a friend

There is a wedding forum on here and they will also be able to give you great advice on there.

lifeandtimes

Thanks for the replies guys,very helpful stuff all around and i didnt know about the wedding forum,ill have a look in there but the all the ideas you gave seem very manageable,i know my girlfriend will love them cheers

LegacyUser

Hey OP,
myself and himself got married a few years ago. We were very definite that we did not want to start our married life in debt so we did things a bit differently
For our actual wedding, we had just immediate family (parents and siblings) and we had booked a meal in a fabulous hotel. We hired a photographer to just do the formal photographs at the church. That evening, we had a massive party, with a dj and all our extended family and friends.
I know this might not be to everyones taste but I can honestly say that it was the best day of my life.
It was lovely having a portion of our day with just our nearest and dearest. Plus, i cant even count the amount of our friends who were relieved not to have to take time off work to sit in a church and hang around a hotel for a few hours.
Because we only had twenty people for the meal, the hotel was amazing, the food was incredible, the athmosphere was relaxed and enjoyable.
And no one batted an eyelid about the evening party either, in fact since then 2 of our friends have used the same plan for their weddings.
Also remember, its the personal touches that will make the day stand out for you both so put some time and effort into those.
The night before our wedding, I was staying in my parents house (as traditional) and my hubby had arranged for a beauty therapist to come to give a relaxing massage, complete surprise! the next morning, breakfast was delivered with champagne along with a card telling me he was thinking of me and couldnt wait to see me at the church.
When I got into the car, he had arranged to have a dvd player playing a dvd he had made of special moments we had shared together.
It was all these things that made our day special and unique and i wouldnt change a single minute of it.
I hope this helps and I wish you all the happiness and love in your marriage that I am lucky enough to have.

dafunk

Registry office followed by a buffet dinner, byob and everyone bring a dish, some might find that tacky or in bad taste but it's the way I'd do it.

ted1

One of the group buying sites had a great deal on weddings at the moment. It'll be on dealpages.ie

tenchi-fan

Disagree with the registry office idea. A church wedding would cost just as much. You can buy wedding dresses online for €300. Rent suits for ... not sure, but not that expensive. Book a function room in a hotel, I'm sure they'd be only too glad of the business... and invite only immediate family and close friends. Then a package holiday in Tenerife

All in all, I can't see how a wedding could cost anywhere near €25,000 when all you really need to spend is around €5,000.

Neyite

I know a couple who got married for about €1500. And they had a brilliant day.

They had a registry office ceremony with family only, followed by a meal in a really nice restaraunt (which they got a great deal on because they were sitting down at 3.30 and gone by 7pm, so not impinging on normal restaraunt opening times) then onto a pub with a bit of a dance floor, and music, where the invite was open to everyone.
Dress was on sale in a high street shop, hair and makeup done by family, no bridesmaids/groomsmen etc. Very relaxed, intimate and low key, but one of the best weddings I've ever been to.

homerjay2005

set a budget first off anyway, which will determine the amount of guets you can invite, but in essence, there is a set cost for -

church
cake
photographer/video
dresses/suits
flowers

and one or 2 more things. they are the main outlay and set a budget for them. then the size of the reception depends your budget, but if you invite 100 people, your likely to get about €6,000 back in cash at least.

you can get a really good reception for €40 a head in dublin.

kylith

My brother did a great job for very little money for his wedding:
Married in registry office
Everyone carpooled back to his house
Marquee in the garden
A few of his friends made the food as his wedding present
Another friend took the photos
Another friend was in charge of the music
Few slabs of cans and boxes of wine

It was a great night and everyone had a great time. The biggest expense was probably the booze.

Another of my brothers is planning his wedding. It'll be registry office, restaurant, then pub. I'm really looking forward to it.

Sleepy

Two things to contribute to this:

If you're getting a mate with an SLR to do the wedding photos, don't expect anything like the same results as a decent pro. That said, be very wary of "pros" that charge significantly less than the the going rate (1500 or more). Anyone can refer to themselves as a professional photographer and even affiliations to photography associations mean nothing. To judge a photographer, judge by their portfolio and recommendations, not by their prices, gear, website or a good sales pitch. If you do decide to go with a friend, try and find one that photography is a serious hobby for, not just your cousin's boyfriend who has an expensive camera (most entry level dSLR's are bought by people who never take them out of auto mode and wouldn't have a clue of what they're taking on in doing a wedding). The photography forum here would be a good place to find someone who's just starting out in wedding photography that might be prepared to do a wedding cheap in order to build their portfolio. Many of the posters there will be at the stage where they've done "second shooter" to an established professional and could be a very good option for someone on a budget.

For the wedding dress: http://www.oxfamireland.org/oxfambridal/. Yes, it might sound "cheap" but the fact is, most wedding dresses are only ever worn for a few hours after costing four figures. The dresses they have in OxfamBridal cost around two to four hundred euro and would include serious designer labels (I've heard of someone who got a Karen Millen dress there).

fungun

Agree with the above, I have seen some friendships crumble over wedding photograph expectations!

However you can get a different type of photo album if you just ask everyone to take lots of photos with their digital cameras and send them to you - you will get some good ones in there for sure, nut not the portraity ones!

I was in same situation as you and went away to get married - just booked a small place with ~25 people in total, was great. Then did a pub night with mates when we got back.

Sleepy

Here's the link to the group deal if Carlow would suit for the reception:

http://www.groupon.ie/deals/dublin/talbot-hotel-carlow/1039988

KittyeeTrix

Neyite wrote: »

I know a couple who got married for about €1500. And they had a brilliant day.

They had a registry office ceremony with family only, followed by a meal in a really nice restaraunt (which they got a great deal on because they were sitting down at 3.30 and gone by 7pm, so not impinging on normal restaraunt opening times) then onto a pub with a bit of a dance floor, and music, where the invite was open to everyone.
Dress was on sale in a high street shop, hair and makeup done by family, no bridesmaids/groomsmen etc. Very relaxed, intimate and low key, but one of the best weddings I've ever been to.

This is exactly how we got married almost except we had a buffet meal in a local hotel which had a resident bar and a dance floor..... Cut the cake in front of all the hotel guests and the band even let our guests belt out a few songs!!

We had about 50 people there and they said it was the most relaxed fun wedding they'd ever been to

Overall cost, about 2,000

I am a friend

Op is the lack of plans stressing you out or causing you problems in the relationship?