Feel like my life is falling apart.

LegacyUser

Okay, so I've come to a point in my life, and I'm just despairing. Here's how I reached this point. I'm a 30 year old guy. Have a job, group of friends, am single, live away from home in my own apartment. This year has been particularly difficult. In January, I lost my job. It came as a shock, and made things difficult both monitarily, and personally. I only got another job in June, which I count myself very lucky to have. Pretty much immediately after I was made redundant, my flatmate at the time told me, out of the blue, she was moving out. Not due to anything I'd done. She just wanted a change of scenery. A few of my closest friends have emigrated. Most of my other friends are in relationships, getting married and having babies. And I find myself a bit lost, left behind, and lonely.

Recently, everything has gotten on top of me. I feel like I've hit a brick wall and I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm heartbroken, and I'm anxious nearly all the time. I'm losing a lot of sleep, and losing my appetite. I feel like I'm losing the run of myself, and sad a lot of the time. My friends have been towers of strength. They always sing my praises and tell me how wonderful I am. And I do believe them. I'm quite proud of the kind of person I am. But I do feel awfully lonely. Especially at the weekends, when the work week is over, and I find myself with nothing to do, and nobody to talk to. Christ, I even feel like crying writing this. I've signed up to take some evening courses. I'm having a first meeting with a hypnotherapist on Friday to help with the terrible loss of sleep I've experienced recently.

But I just feel so alone. I don't want to feel so sad all the time. And I don't want to have to lean on my friends so much. They have their own lives, and I don't want to impose so much. But damn, I feel like collapsing into myself. I feel lost.

fiona12

Might help to speak to a professional. Make sure you show your friends how grateful you are for their help.

Sorry I can not give any advice, just hope you feel better soon! Hug

maameeo

completely understand how you feel hun. i've felt like that so many times, im sure many people here could tell you stories about their life and how they felt everything was crumbling down around them. In my case i had a partner, a daughter, a job, everything seemed fine but i felt lost, lonely and i was falling apart.
It was depression, have you ever been depressed? I'd advice you to go to the doctor and tell them exactly how you are feeling. its nothing to be ashamed of. im 28 and i think all of my friends at this stage have gone through it!
Its great that you are starting night courses and hypno, shows you are doing stuff to fix it but i do think a trip to the doc is needed if you are feeling this down.

Best of luck hun x

LegacyUser

Hi there,

Im a 30 year old female, and know exactly what you mean with regards to friends all settled and feeling left behind and bored and lonely at the weekends. I got myself into a lot of bother re: losing job, bad relationship, still tied to a mortgage for a house i no longer live in etc etc. I started to suffer extreme anxiety and had the sleep loss and constant fast palpatations, i felt like nothing was going to get better and i eventually went to the doctor who prescribed an anti-depressant, just to get me through. I was very reluctant to take the tablet at the time, but nothing else was working, id tried hynotherapy, acupuncture etc and eventually took it. After about a month i began to feel like i could get a grip on things and i wasnt as sad anymore. Its now about five months since i started and i feel a lot better. Things are slowly but surely getting better and i see being in a relationship is not the be all and end all of everything and at the moment a lot of people are going through stuff at our age, you're not alone. Try and have a positive attitude and try new things even like talking to people outside your comfort zone, not just viewing the weekend social scene as the only time to meet people. Most of all, dont give up.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies. I am always sure to show my friends how appreciative I am of their help and support. They really seem to care, and it's a great thing to have as support. I just really get lonely at times. The hypnotherapist I'm going to see is also a psychologist. I'm hoping that talking to this person will help get to the root of my issue, so that I can get on with living my life happily. Maameemo, thank you for sharing your experience. It makes me hopeful for a way through this. Because at times, I think there's no way out.

Miss Fluff

Aside from your inability to cope it sounds like you have a lot of physical symptoms of depression/anxiety disorder as well. I think talking to a GP would benefit you enormously as it's only them who will be able to properly diagnose and consequently advise on the best course of treatment. It's great that you have a good support network around you etc but sometimes it does take professional help. Hope you feel better soon.