Some advice please?

LegacyUser

so the story is me and this guy have been in contact a few weeks now through online dating. we havent met up yet but talk all the time, get along great. he made the initial contact and sort of set the bar for contacting and i went along with it. I am interested because he seems really keen. We are always talking about when we are going to meet, seems definite that it will happen.
So far there have been no plans to meet been made, I have suggested it but he seems busy.
Now, out of nowhere he has cut contact. Stopped calling, texting, emailing. This is only after a few days but it seems strange compared to the full on contact beforehand. I think he might be busy but it only takes a second to send a text or call.
I am going a bit mental here as I hate no explanations for odd behaviour, and I really want to meet up.
So i guess he has either met someone else or just decided to back off. I have no idea and don't know when is the best time for me to contact him or leave it a few days.

The reason why i am posting here is because i have been burned before with initial full on ness to dissipate to nothing with no explanation before.

Would like to know some thoughts <Mod Snip>. Thanks for reading.

DangerMouse27

Hi
Maybe he is in a relationship already? I have two friends who trawl internet dating sites for sex. Yeah its awful but they have succeeded. They are both single.

I am not saying that is why the guy has not contacted you back but you seem really nice.

Id put it down to him bein' a messer and thats that.

Miss Fluff

He's a total messer. Avoid at all costs and be glad it went no further. I wouldn't bother chasing him for explanations either, you didn't actually meet him or anything so he doesn't owe you anything. His behaviour is textbook of so may guys who prowl around internet dating sites...

Ickle Magoo

I'd ask yourself whether somebody who pulls the plug on a previously full-on contact is really worth the effort. I'd just forget about them and go back to looking elsewhere - if they dropped contact because something is going on in their real life then fair enough...but I wouldn't put any importance on any kind of internet contact until you have met, are dating and have actually established you actually have a relationship going on - too many out for a quicky to do anything else.

All the best you.

LegacyUser

thanks for the replies. Well I suppose I am confused why contact has been minimised BEFORE we even slept together.
I know he doesnt owe me anything but I think I am within my rights to ask what the story is and why he dropped off? I just dont want to seem like some neurotic head de ball chasing him but I also dont want the hassle of being strung along and would rather know where it stands. we are both adults and both said we are not fond of games.

So i texted him anyway and he said he was mad busy, which i guessed he might have. still i dont know why he didnt just say that instead of leaving me guessing over a few days. he said he will be busy next week too. not going to hold out for too much now at this stage, i will see what happens but at least i know not to expect too much. guess i am just disappointed a bit as he doesnt seem as keen as me to meet up, he is just quite content to talk to me when he is not so busy, so i dont know where it is even going.

i am still keeping the previous experiences and those of friends to the forefront of my mind though. the full on contact to nothing. i probably came across as a headcase, i dont know but i am not in the humour to be messed with.

dellas1979

Girl - and this goes to anyone who does online dating - 2/3 texts max, and then you meet.
You should not draw it out, no matter if he is busy/you busy, because you start getting attached/used to it, without any real meaning - and then it gets confusing.

Leave it be. I know its a killer, but dont keep thinking about it. Luck you that you didnt meet him!!

Ah ok - your above post got there before mine did. The first line of your second post is amusing.

I am a friend

You are not being led on - tbh he has made it pretty clear, through his lack of contact that he is not interested.