Wednesday Funnies

MonkieSocks

After having a nice 69 with his girlfriend Bill remembered that he had an appointment with the dentist.

He was afraid that the dentist would notice the smell of fanny on his breath so he brushed his teeth, used dental floss and on top of that had a bottle of Listerine.

As he arrived at the dentist he ate a packet of extra strong mints.

His turn came up and the dentist told him to take a seat.

Feeling confident and relaxed, he opened his mouth wide.

The dentist got close and said

"Did you have a 69 before you came here?"

Bill says "How did you know?

Does my breath smell like fanny?"

The dentist replied













"No you have skid marks on your forehead..!!

________________________________

There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

"Well, whatcha' gonna do about it?" he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears.

"Come on, man," the biker says, "I didn't think you'd CRY. I can't stand to see a man crying."

"This is the worst day of my life," I say.

"I'm a complete failure.
I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me.
When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don't have any insurance.
I left my wallet in the cab I took home.
I found my wife with another man and then my dog bit me."

"So I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all, I buy a drink, I drop a capsule in and sit here watching the poison dissolve; then you show up and drink the whole thing!

But enough about me, how's your day going?"

shawnee

Love the second one !