punching girlfriend aftermath

willmunny1990

I posted a thread about the situation with my girlfriend not so long ago but it was closed for some reason,the jist of it was id been watching porn,she wasnt happy so broke my laptop off a wall and by the end of the relationship gave my dog to the dog pound as revenge.

Her giving the dog to the pound out of spite and revenge was to much for me so i lashed out and punched her in the face and basically scared her into telling me where my dog was.I know what i did was wrong but i believe the circumstances go some way to explaining my actions.

The aftermath of this has left me with very few friends,all my girlfriends stopped talking to me and most of my male friends have aswell,i basically only have two friends left who talk and hang out with me,these two thankfully are my best friends.My own mother acts completely different towards me now,i used to be very close to her now shes distant and cold,although she does still talk to me.

im devastated at all this and im wondering does anyone have advice on how to build bridges with my friends and family,all my girlfriends think im a monster and woman beater,my own mam has gone cold towards me and the locals look at me with judgemental eyes,its so hard to ignore all this when everything is against me.

How can i make people see my side of events?Is it because shes a woman that shes getting away with this and im getting the brunt of everyones hate because im the man.

catch me if you can

volunteer to help out at a womans refuge in your sparetime. show your Mam your doing it to learn from your mistakes. Word of mouth will spread amongst your friends and you will be helping people and learning a valuable lesson.
It was wrong to hit your girlfriend , you should have walked away amd straight to her parents house. and got her parents to find out where the dog was.
you played in to her hands. yes she sounds vile and nasty. But what you did was not right either. There were two of you in this toxic relationship.Your an adult , you should have left long ago.
also a way to show your family and friends your changing is to sign up for anger management classes.

Dan133269

I remember reading your post and thinking at the time that I would have done the exact same in the circumstances. Well I probably would have tried to avoid punching her, but I would have ended up physically assaulting her to find out what happened to the dog.

I was even thinking about it afterwards. Now that I've had time to reflect upon it, I still think you were right. Fcuk her, it's her that should be apologising.

Big Bag of Chips

"Is it because shes a woman that shes getting away with this and im getting the brunt of everyones hate because im the man."

No, it's because you "punched her in the face and scared her into telling you where the dog was."

As far as I can tell she didn't punch you and scare you?

What she did was wrong.

What you did was assault and domestic violence.

Regardless of what she did, there is no excuse for what you did.

Your mother is treating you differently because she is ashamed.

Your female friends are staying away from you, because you are not who/what they thought you were.

Your relationship sounds like it wasn't a good one anyway.. but you went too far.

looky loo

Hi op, female here, did read your previous post, have to say I would have gone mental myself if someone sent my dog to the pound. Hitting wasnt the answer but hindsight is 20/20. You've had a lucky escape from this relationship it sounded toxic for both of you.

Start building bridges, go talk to your mum, tell her you lost the head and you're sorry, as previous poster said maybe a bit of volunteer work will help with your reputation. Just remember its not what people think about you that matters its how you feel about yourself.

MitchKoobski

Undoubtedly the only bit of information going around is that you punched her.

Do what you can to show people you are a good guy and get back into good stnaidngs with everyone. You know what you did was wrong. You don't owe her anything, but you can make it up to anyone who sees you in a different light.

catch me if you can

Also every time you say , I punched her but.... this is where you loose credibility with people i will bet. Men who make excuses come across as not wanting to change. A man who holds the hands up and says it was me im to blame no excuses seems believable to want to change.
yes she is a vile girl, and is prob spinning wonderful yarns about you. but if everyone knows your side of the story, maybe stop plugging that now and just be sorry and ashamed. Turn the other cheek, build your life back up. and keep your temper in serious check.
Remember Its hard to forgive someone who has excuses.
Plus im a woman who suffered from a violent abusive boyfriend (thank god years ago), and i can even see she is a right cow. But put all that aside. stay right away from her. and make yourself a better man.

Ickle Magoo

You were given a clear reason why your thread was closed - and you already got a raft of advice.

Get yourself some anger management classes - there is never any excuse for domestic violence and this isn't the appropriate platform to be making excuses for it.

Please do not start another thread on this topic or you risk losing your posting rights to this forum.