who pays?

sineadc1984

This may be a stupid question by neither myself or my partner know the answer!! Who pays for the bridal party's hotel rooms for the wedding?

elvis jones

Put simple............themselves.

All ours did and any wedding i've been involved in i've done so myself as well.

kandr10

Yeah I'd agree with that. Unless it's included in a package of course. Or you wanted to do it as a present.

elvis jones

kandr10 wrote: »

Yeah I'd agree with that. Unless it's included in a package of course. Or you wanted to do it as a present.

Actually now that i think of it the hotel provided rooms for your parents as part of the package.

silly

We got our parents rooms and the best man and chief bridesmaids room thrown in after a bit of negotiating

Cathmandooo

There is no right or wrong answer, you'll get responces having experienced both. I don't think it's completely necessary, it is a lovely gesture of appreciation though.

solovely

When I was bridesmaid my room was paid for for the 2 nights, same with another friend who was bridesmaid for another wedding. And I know that another friend getting married next month is paying for a house in the hotel complex for all the bridal party for 2 nights.

I haven't heard of the bridal party having to pay for themselves, but I'm sure it happens when money is tight. I know at my cousin's wedding (where money would have been tight) the bridal party just went home to their own houses after the wedding.

bills

We paid for their rooms. Venue was expensive & i would not have expected them to pay since they did so much for us.

Gatica

Some pay for it, some don't. Do whatever suits you and your bridal party. Many hotels throw in rooms for parents for free, you can use those for your parents or your bridal party, it's up to you. We're not getting any rooms free however, we've decided to significantly subsidise a number of rooms for our closest relatives that would be strapped for cash.

I think most people nowadays understand that weddings are not cheap, not for the B&G and not for their friends and family attending. It's a nice gesture if you can afford it. If you think they can afford it, then why put yourself under strain? I've known couples who could afford it but didn't pay for rooms for bridal party or parent, cos they knew everyone else was ok with paying for own rooms. It may sound stingy at first, but they actually got them really lovely expensive presents instead, with the money they would've otherwise spent on their rooms. There's no right or wrong, but whatever works in your own situation.

Honey-ec

We paid for our bridal party's rooms, I just think it's good manners. As others have said, though, some people do and some people don't. If you can afford it, why not?

chiefwiggum

yep we got married in druids glen and paid for the bridal party although they did give us the parents room for free and then even upgraded them to suites at no extra cost
i agree it is a nice gesture but not always needed
i did groomsman at my best mates wedding who was married in galway and they put us up in a suite for 2 nights in the connemara coast which i thought fair play but wasnt expected at all
remember financial times have changed and everyone knows it so dont feel you have too but i would say its either pay for all or pay for none

Sofiztikated

With our wedding, I've gotten 6 rooms as part of the package, so that covers our suite, 2 BM's, 2 GM's, and one set of parents. Was going to pay for the other Mammies room, but she's decided she's staying with her sisters in another room, so fair enough.

Where I work, 9 times out of 10, the BM's and GM's go through to the main account, whether its the bride & groom paying for it, or one of the Daddies.

I have seen BM's and GM's pay their own rooms though.

Seeing as you are stumping up for dinner, dresses, suits, wines, whatever else, some people will offer to pay their own way.

So definite answer is ... depends.

FluffyKitten

I am going to be bridesmaid for my friend and I don't expect her to pay for my room. She will pay for my dress, makeup, hair and whatever else, and if I wasn't bridesmaid I'd have to pay for all that and the room myself anyway. It would be very nice if she did but weddings are expensive enough.

Supermummy

im bridesmaid in dec and we are paying for hotel rooms ourselves, we get a discounted rate for wedding party. I think its enought that the bridesmaid dresses are bought for us and hair and make up is paid for on the day i wouldnt expect them to pay for our hotel rooms too..!

Moonbeam

I will pay for my bridesmaids rooms, I just think that it is the polite thing to do.

FluffyKitten

Moonbeam wrote: »

I will pay for my bridesmaids rooms, I just think that it is the polite thing to do.

Thats more than polite Moonbeam, its very generous of you!
I'm sure any bridal party would be delighted to have them paid for but it seems to be the general opinion that while it is often done it is not expected, especially if the reception is held locally.
So its ok to do whatever is right for you, OP.

Cellygirl

We paid for both sets of parents, bridal party and our siblings as well. We wanted to do it and budgeted for it from the start. If I'm honest, I wouldn't have dreamed of not paying for their rooms.

However, everyone is different and everyone has different priorities and budgets.

If you can afford it OP, I'd do it.

Brookie123

I think it's bad manners not to pay for the bridal party. I would be insulted if mine wasn't paid for.

Gatica

depends on size and circumstances of bridal party. My room wasn't paid for me, I certainly did not in any way feel that it should've been. I would've been going to the wedding anyway and paying for my room, so why is it any different if I'm part of the group?
If I had to stay the night before if it was far away, then I'd probably expect some kind of help-out with it, seeing as how I'd need to be there early for the prep.

iloveboots

I work in a hotel. Most of the time everybody pays for their own rooms. Sometimes the bridal parties rooms are footed by the bride and groom, sometimes all the immediate families too. The only person who never pays for their own room is the Priest, in my experience.

Sofiztikated

Brookie123 wrote: »

I think it's bad manners not to pay for the bridal party. I would be insulted if mine wasn't paid for.

So after the bride & groom paying for:

Your dress
Your hair
Possibly your make up
Shoes
Dinner
Wine
Transport to the wedding
and probably more,

You'd be insulted if they didn't pay for your room?

Most people would think it a nice gesture if it was paid for, but not expect it, TBH.

LeeHoffmann

As other posters have said, I think respective budgets come into account. If you're strapped for cash and your bm's and gm's are financially secure, it doesn't make much sense to get a loan out to pay for their room (and I think it would be inconsiderate of your bm/gm to demand you do so). If you're financially secure but your bm's and gm's aren't, the right thing is to pay for the room. If you're both tight on money, it gets tricky - but I think, if you're that close, you should be able to work something out to suit you all.

If you are asked to be a bm/gm or if somebody is happy to be your be bm/gm, you should be honoured. Any favours or gifts should be given and accepted graciously

Gatica

LeeHoffmann wrote: »

As other posters have said, I think respective budgets come into account. If you're strapped for cash and your bm's and gm's are financially secure, it doesn't make much sense to get a loan out to pay for their room (and I think it would be inconsiderate of your bm/gm to demand you do so). If you're financially secure but your bm's and gm's aren't, the right thing is to pay for the room. If you're both tight on money, it gets tricky - but I think, if you're that close, you should be able to work something out to suit you all.

If you are asked to be a bm/gm or if somebody is happy to be your be bm/gm, you should be honoured. Any favours or gifts should be given and accepted graciously

+1! Never expect someone to pay for you, but help out others when you can... (the golder rule or something along those lines applies)