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  • 08-09-2011 2:40am
    #1
    xTLCx
    Registered Users Posts: 15 ✭


    Hi to anyone that reads this.

    I've been with my boyfriend for 13 months now and after 4 months of being together I moved in with him. This is the first time I've moved out.

    Everything was great in the beginning but lately, we've been disagreeing and arguing a lot.. we don't talk and go to bed ignoring each other. I love him loads and I know that if we broke up that things just wouldn't be the same. I'm emotionally attached to him but not sure if I'm still "in love" with him and I don't want to leave. I wouldn't be able to bear not seeing him as much as I do but at the same time he annoys me with the way he carries on when we argue. What should I do? I feel like I'm married as I don't go out anymore and don't see my friends about 90% of the time.

    I'd like to move home with my parents where I can have a life but don't want to leave him here, the thoughts of him alone after all this time makes me upset.

    Does anyone have any advice please?
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    #2
    Taltos
    Registered Users Posts: 20,830 ✭✭✭✭Taltos


    I am 100% with SF on this - moving in together after just 4 months seems very fast - sure you would still have been in the honeymoon period of the relationship - planning dates etc. Why swap that for bills, cleaning and stress?

    In terms of going to bed not talking - want to shake you both - that is how children behave - and is a surefire way to terminally impact a loving relationship.
    You both have to work on your communication - if he is not good at this then you have to let him know HOW it makes you feel - don't blame him - just let him know how you feel when he takes a certain approach - and ask him if he can change that approach - in turn offer to do the same thing.
    Don't let this descend into tit-for-tat...

    I don't want to say that you should walk away from this relationship - however if you cannot work on your communication now - then really what chance does the rest of the relationship have?
    > silences; sulking; little point scoring...

    Take the time to think about it now.
    Also - just because you lived together - actually because you lived together - you both need to make the effort to go out with your friends - otherwise you will go crazy staring at each others sulking faces all day...


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