I think I am in love with my friend

Lost24

Know him for a few years now and In those years I truthfully have not stopped thinking about him almost 24/7. There is loads of things I over the years have witnessed little happenings that gives me a hint that he may feel the same way.. My girl friend seems to think he does..... But I think I am over analysing as you do, but then I email and he doesn't reply etc. writing this I just want to tell someone as it's eating me up inside. I am afraid to tell him as I don't want to ruin the friendship we have or make myself out to be a fool. I am affraidts to tell mutual friends as he would find out etc. I have never felt so strongly about a guy nor been in a relationship either. So I am Lost! I all seems easy saying I will tell him but it's a big step for me and friendship means alot. It's been a while since we chatted I supose I am waiting for him to make contact.

Kadongy

Best to talk to him in person anyway and to broach the subject very gradually/cautiously/gently.

BattleCorp

If it is eating you up inside, then I think you have to go and do something about it. These feelings tend not to go away, you know this as you have been feeling this way for a few years now.

I reckon you have to either let him know how you feel or else keep going the way you are and let it eat away at you.

I'm a guy and take it from me, most guys are crap at reading body language and taking hints so he mightn't know that you like him.

I think if you want to let him know that you are interested in more than friendship, then you should be direct and let him know how you feel.

There's no easy solution for you as being direct does have risks. You might frighten the life out of him, he mightn't be interested, who knows what he thinks, but at least you will know.

And then again, he might be feeling the same as you, but just too shy to make the first move.

It's a gamble but if I was in your shoes, I'd speak up and let him know how you feel.

vicecreamsundae

not tying to be a downer, but i'd take what your girlfriends say with a pinch of salt. in my experience, friends can be awful for telling you what you want to hear, or even believing what they want to believe.

you say you're afraid to bring it up for fear of ruining the friendship. but to me, it's not reallllly a real friendship if you feel that way about him and he doesn't. any friendship where you're afraid that you're honesty could damage that friendship... isn't a genuine one.

i've been where you are, and I think when we have a crush on a friend, we tend to overrate the friendship. you say you haven't spoken in a while, and that you're waiting to hear from him. that's not typical great-friendship stuff.

how would you feel if he called you up tomorrow and mentioned he met some girl, or if the next time you bumped into him, he was all over someone? if your answer is 'heartwrenched", then I think you just need to be straight up and tell him how you feel -mention you like him, but don't feel like you need to explain you've been mad about him for years.

if he feels the same, and he might, then awesome. if he doesn't, then you'll feel like **** for a week or two, but then you'll feel okay and you'll know that you know, and you won't have to constantly wonder or read into things anymore and you'll be able to move on. You can still stay in touch and have a friendship. It won't be super close, but it doesn't sound like it's super close right now.

Lost24

Thanks I get what your saying. He seemed to have been much closer to our other friends but there just seems to be always a distance between us which I find weird. We both have same interests etc. But we never really got the opportunity to talk when in class meetups or outside gatherings. Once I thought I food him staring when at a party and our ees met for like what seemed for ever but was 2secs. I have chatted to him in the last 2 months online but I am always one to start conversations. I know it's prob best to tell him.... but I am scared. What of I dnt know lol I am so shy and stupid when it comes to these sorta things!