Where to start?

athtrasna

I'm 34 and have been off my pill for 2.5 years now. Problem is my cycle is 25-47 days so it makes TTC very difficult.

My GP still doesn't seem too bothered...did some blood tests last year, nothing to worry about she said, and to come back in a year if still nothing. My OH was recently at a GP in the same practice and mentioned it to his doctor and he got a referral letter for fertility tests...the receptionist said our options were HARI or Sims.

To me it seems very scary and very serious to go straight into one of these centres...reading the posts on here it looks like more blood tests and maybe an ultrasound might have been good starting points.

I'm starting to think I might be better off changing my GP and starting with someone new to see their take on it. Any thoughts?

Neyite

I think that your GP should have referred you, so if they havent, request that they do so. All our investigations except preliminary blood tests were done by the clinic, not the GP.


I can understand it sounds daunting, but you will feels so much more proactive with stuff getting done, than waiting for the soul destroying failed cycle every month.

I did inital bloods in the GP, then the clinic organised a HSG for me and a semen analysis for him. We were diagnosed as Unexplained, as everything seemed fine, yet we were 2 years trying. In June we began treatment with them, and I'm now 4 weeks pregnant.

They wont put you into IVF right away - assuming that your bloods show your are ovulating and your hormones are fine, and his swimmers are swimmin' they will order the Xray/Ultrasound, and so on until they either find something to fix, or something works. There are many steps before IVF, such as Ovulation Induction with Timed Sexual Intercourse (TSI) Inter Uterine Insemination (IUI) which they would try for several months before moving you onto something as big as IVF.

Our success happened with TSI on the second try. We have a good chat thread at the top of the forum going and a few of us are familiar with the Clinics, some are attending HARI or Sims (I'm in Galway) so might be able to give you a lot more information than I can, you should join us.:)

athtrasna

Thanks for your reply. I guess what scares me is my sister has now had 3 mcs and she's younger than me.

I am a bit scared at the whole thing becoming a science project...does that sound weird?

Neyite

Not weird at all. But you have to remember that you and your sister, even if you were identical, will have very different reproductive experiences, no matter how alike you are, plus there is a whole 50% that would not be applicable as you both have different partners bringing their unique DNA to the mix. Age factors in somewhat, but might be totally cancelled out by, say, you having a healthier lifestyle than your sister. Again, she might be a role model for health, but her partner very unhealthy.

They don’t really know what causes miscarriage, but lately they are starting to understand the importance of healthy sperm at DNA level – some experts are attributing some male factor into miscarriages. Certainly things like smoking and alcohol damage sperm at a DNA level, they just don’t know how much.

My experience was vastly different to my sister – she conceived easily, had a m/c, an ectopic and went on to have 3 children in quick succession. (the last two caught her off guard so she is nearly afraid of her fertility now) Me? nothing, nada for 2 solid years, and well, who knows where my story will end up?

You may have no miscarriages, its the risk we have to take on our path to being a mum. I try not to be scared about miscarriage, but it’s a sad fact of life that a lot of women have them. But, I keep telling myself that worrying wont change fate and I just have a waiting game for now. And apparently when they do arrive safe, we worry are they too hot/too cold, breathing/ eating too little /eating too much /developing ok– its not just a pregnancy thing, we will worry about our kids from conception to old age. Certainly my mother still has a good worry about me and always will – and I’m 36!

I totally get the whole science thing – If this TSI had not worked, we would have clinically conceived our child, and if I am honest, I am a little relieved that we were successful before that. Having said that, I would have drank eye of newt if they told me it would give me a baby! I was put on Clomid tablets for 3 months, then if that didn’t work I would have moved onto injectibles, for another 3 months. There is a lot that they can do before resorting to IVF.

It’s disappointing to come to the realisation that you have difficulty conceiving. But deep down you knew that when you went to your GP for the blood tests. Now its a matter of staying on course, focusing on having your family by whatever means.

Look at it this way, if you hurt your knee and were an avid runner, and the doctor fixed you up in time for you to run the race you entered, its still you running, winning the race.

athtrasna

Neyite wrote: »

Look at it this way, if you hurt your knee and were an avid runner, and the doctor fixed you up in time for you to run the race you entered, its still you running, winning the race.

lol - I had major knee surgery this year Still not ready to run though.

Thanks so much for your reassuring words x