Am I taking too much on?

LegacyUser

None of these issues are particularly bad, it's just they're having an effect on me and I don't know who to talk to.

I think I've taken too much on recently and I'm starting to burn out. It worries me that I'm so tired as I'm only in my late 20's and I should be fit and healthy. For this reason in the past 3 months I have given up smoking, started weight watchers and started exercising. All this while working 50hr weeks and doing a masters, and looking after some sick relatives. I just feel run ragged and tonight I got a take away, drank some beer, smoked some fags and had a cry. I feel like such a failure. I live far from work so am up very early and home late. Then I've to help the sick relatives, study, try and cook something healthy to eat, exercise, oh and did I mention study??? Finding time to sleep is hard, I'm getting about 5hrs a night, and am finding myself dozing off in work and being extremely tired while commuting which is so dangerous. I just feel lucky I've no kids to look after or I don't know what I'd do.

I'm lucky in that I don't have any serious money worries or any specific health worries except for the tiredness and the fact that smoking kills! I know I should be grateful for what I have and so many others out there have it so much worse. Why then, when things aren't actually that bad, am I finding it all so hard?

Reading over this makes me feel like a massive whinger who just needs to get her sh*t together

thefeatheredcat

OP you are far, far from a failure! I'd be incredibly proud of you, knowing what you are doing right now!

The first priority of it all is your health - your mental and emotional well being, as well as your physical health. You need to keep yourself going but without burning yourself out by making a few choice priorities and knowing when too much is too much for you.

As Sunflower suggested, is there anyone that can help with your sick relatives for a while? Or can you move closer to work? Are they options that are open to you?

Do you get any time in the week just for you? I would suggest that you sit down with yourself and make an action plan to balance it all and prioritise and draw in some help where you can.

Either way - don't beat yourself up over it all. You're taking on a lot right now, maybe how you reacted the other night is a clear sign to you that you need to get some extra help in the short term to reach your long term goals.

LegacyUser

thanks for the words of encouragement. I get some help from my younger brother but apart from that there's noone else. My partner is a great help too but he has his own life, jobs, interests and i don't want to put my worries on him. I felt I was just whinging about my life, but now I realise I may just be taking too much on after all. Unfortunately I can't move closer to work as I need to be near my family, but I am trying to get a job closer to home, but we all know jobs aren't so plentiful anymore!

I don't get much me time really. Any free time I do get I just want to sleep to be honest. I think I need to reassess everything I'm doing

Overheal

I took on more work recently too. Went back to college full time so between it and my study and my job I'm probably working 50+ hours a week. It's all good. So far.

Interestingly one of the first things they had us read in English was an Extract from the Tao of Pooh. But basically one of the big points being conveyed in the passage is - well Taoism - but the idea that you have to balance out the Stuff with a proportionate amount of Nothing. You are going to burn out if you spend every free minute worrying about the things you should be doing. Sometimes you have to remind yourself to chill out and do - nothing. Sit around talk to friends stare blankly off a park bench, it doesn't matter. Something that gives your brain a rest from all the overstimulation of life. I think they were onto something.

Try thinking about that. And then try not to think at all. At least for a moment. I usually encourage a calm environment, usually outdoors. Something about all that unfiltered air that wipes my mind blank.