Finish the joke.

Bipolar Joe

So, in The Breakfast Club, when Bender is making his way back to the library, he starts telling a joke but falls through the roof just before the punch line.

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." The naked lady says...

mick.m

why am i holding salami

ronnie3585

Put it in the curry.

The King of Moo

Of course not, I'm clearly tonight's performer! It would be unprofessional of me to drink!

This of course.

PseudoFamous

The naked lady says "No, I would actually like a drink, please." The bartender says, "No, mum, I think you've had enough to drink today."

mattjack

a salami with two feet you say..?how many had the poodle..?

policarp

Bipolar Joe wrote: »

So, in The Breakfast Club, when Bender is making his way back to the library, he starts telling a joke but falls through the roof just before the punch line.

No but the pussy needs a cocktail stick. . .

Beggared

The naked lady says "I'd like a screwdriver please."
The bartender says "Rough night?"
The naked lady replies "No, I just need to be loosen up."

whiskeyman

My poodle would like a drink but my pussy is hungry. Do you have something like this salami I can feed her?

looky loo

Naked blonde walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm, and a two-foot salami under the other. The bartender says, I guess you won't be needing a drink. Naked lady says " oh i thought this was a clothing store" and begins to leave.
The Bartender says " hey hey what's the deal with the dog and the salami?"
And the naked blonde says " I just won them in a poker game"
The bartender says "then why are you naked?'
"OMG " says the Blonde "I'm naked!?"

flutterflye

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." The naked lady says...

Hello, hello, baby; You called, I can't hear a thing.
I have got no service in the club, you see, see…
Wha-Wha-What did you say?
Oh, you're breaking up on me…
Sorry, I cannot hear you, I'm kinda busy.

The King of Moo

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." The naked lady says...

"You're right, I said that on the phone earlier."

"There's somethin' I don't get though" says the barman. "I thought you said you was bringin' two dogs, and one of 'em was a daschund and the other was called 'Growly' or somethin'."

"I never said anything like that." replied the naked woman. "I said I'd bring my sausage, dog, and growler!"

syklops

There are many examples on this page demonstrating why we need a dislike button.

cosmicfart

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." The naked lady says...you are kidding me right this is a fúcking pub aint it?

Insect Overlord

I'm fairly sure Judd Nelson/Bender ad libbed that scene, and that there was never a real punch-line to go with it.

/Buzz Killington

artanevilla

To get to the other side.

lastlaugh

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink."
The naked lady says, "Nah, you got any lube?"
"For what?!" asks the Bartender, incredulously.
"Because I'm gonna shove this salami up my dog's bum" answers the blonde.
"Why would you do that you crazy naked Bee-atch" asks the Bartender confusidley.
"Because I always wanted a sausage Dog!" the nude idiot says.

"Ha Ha Ha" says the bartender, "That's probably the stupidest thing I've ever heard!"
"Don't be so jealous, you fat pr!ck" counters the blonde.

Dangerous Man

The lady says:

The salami goes in my anus. I'll suck off the dog. And I'll have a bacardi breezer. God bless you.

Bipolar Joe

Insect Overlord wrote: »

I'm fairly sure Judd Nelson/Bender ad libbed that scene, and that there was never a real punch-line to go with it.

/Buzz Killington

Yeah, he did, but that's not the point of the thread.

flutterflye

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." The naked lady says...

Yes sir you are right; I am an alcoholic and the consequences would be catastrophic.

WonderWoman!

syklops wrote: »

There are many examples on this page demonstrating why we need a dislike button.

True - on a lighter note she probably said :result of an EPIC night

cosmicfart

lastlaugh wrote: »

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink."
The naked lady says, "Nah, you got any lube?"
"For what?!" asks the Bartender, incredulously.
"Because I'm gonna shove this salami up my dog's bum" answers the blonde.
"Why would you do that you crazy naked Bee-atch" asks the Bartender confusidley.
"Because I always wanted a sausage Dog!" the nude idiot says.

"Ha Ha Ha" says the bartender, "That's probably the stupidest thing I've ever heard!"
"Don't be so jealous, you fat pr!ck" counters the blonde.

…the story continues…..


“fat pr!ck! Why u dirty little bítch”

*barman grabs little poddle and shoves it up naked ladies rectum*

“screeeeeeeeeeeeech howls naked lady but counters with an artfully crafted *recdum* and shíts out the poodle”

Biggins

The joke that Bender tells but never finishes (while crawling through the ceiling) actually has no punchline. According to Judd Nelson, he ad-libbed the line. Originally, he was supposed to tell a joke that would end when he came back into the library and said, "Forgot my pencil", but no one could come up with a joke for that punchline.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088847/trivia

And speaking of ad-lib...

The scene in which all characters sit in a circle on the floor in the library and tell stories about why they were in detention was not scripted. John Hughes told them all to ad-lib.

ncacace

I saw a reply that was perfect....

".....to which the naked blonde replies, 'No, but I could sure use a cigarette' "

Still giggling.

BeerWolf

^Revives an almost 2 year old thread... \o/

Plazaman

How does the bartender know she's naked if he's blind?


Oh no wait, that's a different joke.

SuperGrover

something something sausage dog?

Wossack

ncacace wrote: »

I saw a reply that was perfect....

".....to which the naked blonde replies, 'No, but I could sure use a cigarette' "

Still giggling.

need to work on the timing

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Bipolar Joe wrote: »

A naked blonde walks into a bar, with a poodle under one arm, and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." The naked lady says...

... "of course I need a drink - it's lashing rain out there. All me clothes got wet when I fll into this poodle..."