i must be invisable

LegacyUser

hey im just wondering what to do, no1 seems to carealess about me i never get invited to go anywere im always left sitting at home!! the last time i got a text msg was two weeks ago it seems like no1 wants me in there life and if i disapeared tommorow no1 would even notice. this hurts so much when i see other people out and about with there friends that used to be me, and now for no reason what so ever im being treated like i dont exsisit by everyone!! im relly depressed right now, another weekend without a phonecall or a text msg.....

jimmycrackcorm

I don't understand why you expect people to phone and text you instead of making an effort to do likewise.

LegacyUser

theres no point in me suggesting to do something every1 has plans with there other friends which never involve me, if i text il get maybe one text back and then that will be it, pointless!!

Knasher

Friends can drift apart over time and if you're the type of person, like myself, who only keep a small group, it can happen that you are left without a group of close friends. The most importing thing to remember is firstly that it happens, and that secondly if you don't do something to improve your situation then nothing will change. Sitting home alone and waiting for the phone to ring won't do you any favours. So my advice to you is either reinvest in your friendship by trying to organise things to do with them, rather than waiting for them to come to you, or make new friends by taking up some sort of social hobby.

Hope you feel better soon.

Shill

Do you give the impression that you are always busy?

I was invited to join a friend for drinks once, but declined. They don't ask anymore, needless to say!

Can't you let them know you're bored and wouldn't mind joining them?

LegacyUser

no im never busy im always at home evenings weekends but no1 can be bothered with me i never had a big group of friends two r three at the most, and now dey all seem to have new cooler better friends im just never part of any1s group! fed up and depressed just wish people could see im a nice person and fun to be around, sick of my own company!!

Magicmatilda

invisable girl wrote: »

theres no point in me suggesting to do something every1 has plans with there other friends which never involve me, if i text il get maybe one text back and then that will be it, pointless!!

Very defeatist attitude in my opinion. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Unless you are willing to make a change the situation will just remain the same, you sitting at home alone. You are already decided that people are doing other things without even checking with them. You need to take responsibility for your life. Text your friends and ask them to do something, coffee, lunch, cinema, whatever. If the are busy ask if they can do another time. Also get out and join some clubs or classes. Lots of evening classes starting up at this time of the year. Or take up a sport. Start volunteering, there are loads of ways to meet people. Sitting at home is not one of them.

I hope you find the courage to make a change. Best of Luck

shoes34

invisable girl wrote: »

hey im just wondering what to do, no1 seems to carealess about me i never get invited to go anywere im always left sitting at home!! the last time i got a text msg was two weeks ago it seems like no1 wants me in there life and if i disapeared tommorow no1 would even notice. this hurts so much when i see other people out and about with there friends that used to be me, and now for no reason what so ever im being treated like i dont exsisit by everyone!! im relly depressed right now, another weekend without a phonecall or a text msg.....

I have a friend like you, she doesn't text to see if I am going out and always expects me to make the arrangements and to text her when I am going out. I use to but a few weeks ago I decided not to, wasn't out of malice I just wanted to see if for a change she would organise the night out instead of leaving it to me.

I have told her I may go out tomorrow night I haven't decided and its the truth but she won't text tomorrow to see if I am going out but then will give out when I do go out and she doesn't end up comig.

Sorry I hope that makes sense, in other words maybe you should organise a night out instead of waiting for the text/calls to come from others.

LegacyUser

theres no point inviteing myself to things that people dont want me at, for instance my best friend had a party two weeks ago and invited every1 i didint get an invite so why should i boder i seem to be the person people forget unless they want something, its so hurtfull

bellylint

heya Op,
If you are not finding what you need from your friends, dont leave them as your only option. There are plenty of threads on here (rather than rehashing their words) about things to do where you can meet people. Me personally I joined a couple of sports clubs and it has provided me with some new friends. I met hundreds of people, and obviously only a few of them became friends, no matter how nice you will only click with few people where afriendship will arise... well thats how I feel on the matter. it also can take a while for most friendships to start, and it is an investment. ie it usually isnt a quick switch, but in the end worth the effort. Anyways hope thats of help.

alex73

invisible girl wrote: »

theres no point inviteing myself to things that people dont want me at, for instance my best friend had a party two weeks ago and invited every1 i didint get an invite so why should i boder i seem to be the person people forget unless they want something, its so hurtfull

Not much of a best Friend. My advise, Don't stay at home thinking about it, Go to an Pilates, Kettlebell, Gym, Sports centre, Get fit, Keep active, Join clubs.. Stay positive. That attitude attracts others and you will find your own circle of friends.

What is you main interest in life?

LegacyUser

yeah im trying to get out and about and make new friends the thing is im missing the friends i used to hang out with and find myself checking there facbook seeing what there up to, and den end up feeling really down when i think of all the good memories and fun we used to have its so hard to make new friends when ur used to hanging round with the same people for years you end up compareing new friends to ur old ones if that makes any sense!!

Overheal

invisable girl wrote: »

hey im just wondering what to do, no1 seems to carealess about me i never get invited to go anywere im always left sitting at home!! the last time i got a text msg was two weeks ago it seems like no1 wants me in there life and if i disapeared tommorow no1 would even notice. this hurts so much when i see other people out and about with there friends that used to be me, and now for no reason what so ever im being treated like i dont exsisit by everyone!! im relly depressed right now, another weekend without a phonecall or a text msg.....

I've highlighted the problem right there.

Your friends don't control when you get to leave the house: you do. You can do what you want where you want however you want. I know that when I choose to sit at home, listen to some music and mess around on boards on a friday night that it's my choice, it's not someone else's fault that they didn't want to include me in whatever they were doing. I could easily go out on my own and see a movie, have a drink, go for a damn walk, etc. Or explore a hobby. Whatever.

What I've noticed a lot is people seem to often get caught up in friendships and relationships that they forget how to function as singletons. It's important to realize who you are, as an individual, before you get lost in some mob of friend's with no real identity. Like what music you want to listen to, what you want to wear, what you want to do, etc. And we're all guilty of it. You can always tell when a group of friends has been around eachother long enough because they all look and act alike. That's sort of where jocks and goths and things originate from, to be honest.

My advice to you: Go your own way. Do your own thing. And don't make it contingent on whether or not people follow you when you do it. Sure if you want to go somewhere for the day and ask your friends if they'd like to come along do it, but don't let the decision hang on them. One way or another you should be happy doing your own thing and enjoying your own time.