Best Man Speach! Help!

thirtypence

Hi, have the 'honour' of doing best man for the brother is a couple of weeks! Anyone done a best man speech recently? Did you get any help from anywhere or anyone seen any funny best man speeches in recent weddings (what made people laugh!!)??

Thanks!

actuallylike

Had to do one for my brother there a little while ago, nervous as feck. Found avoiding the cliche lines you find on the internet the best move, obvious and rarely relate to your situation. Just talking about any anecdotes from your childhood worked best (make sure they're relatively funny ) and I made sure to thank the bridesmaids and the priest (seemingly that's meant to be done) and of course his new bride, call her her name with your surname maybe.

Remember that you're preaching to a large variance of ages, so a nudy stag party story will be a no no for Granny. I got a few stories from the stag in that the people on it would know and the the rest were oblivious.

Practice in a mirror as well, it was mortifying for me but loosened me up and got me more comfortable and could pinpoint what was shít and what wasn't.

Try and talk about any advice he gave you and then joke about it maybe. I mentioned that my brother told me what to get as my first haircut (short back and sides) and everyone got a laugh when I said how I don't take much heed of his advice now (I have long hair, that's quite embarassing now I write it out but it worked...honestly:o)

And don't look to drink to calm you down, you'll think you're gas but everyone else won't.

ontheditch2

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neil_Francis_%28rugby_union%29

Seen this and thought it was excellent, just change your brothers name into it. It will surely get a good laugh anyway.

Or change it to more current events.

HairMonster

Great advice from actuallylike!

Definitely practising in front of a mirror is good, and if you can rope in someone you trust to listen to you, even better - it might be embarrassing but it'll be less embarrassing than ending up telling bad jokes on the day.

As for content, I don't think anyone who doesn't know the couple can help with that because you should try to directly relate it to them. But you don't have to be a comedian with hilarious jokes - the biggest laughs are always from funny moments that directly involve the couple. Reminding the guests of the memory will bring it all back, including how funny it was at the time. Keep them short & snappy - rambling stories can lose their impact.

3 stories are plenty, but start off by getting as many stories as you can from friends & family to pick from. Filter out the unsuitable ones no matter how funny they are, e.g. too rude or inappropriate, too long, they need a back story or explanation. Its all about the way you tell them so look at what you have left and see which ones you can get a great punchline from.

Some tips:
Keep it short - a short speech with one or two carefully chosen moments goes down much better than a long hit-and-miss speech with jokes that don't mean anything to the couple.

The guests know you'll be nervous and will be very forgiving as long as you are not being rude or telling inappropriate stories.

Just because you don't get big laughs doesn't mean they don't like it. One of the best best-man's speech I heard didn't get big laughs, but it was one of the wittiest and most entertaining I've heard - it just wasn't a laugh-out-load type of speech. So don't lose heart if you don't get the response you hoped for.

Finally, if you are really nervous and don't think you can carry off the "funny" speech, then don't. A simple, heartfelt speech is appreciated just as much, and will be less embarrassing for you if you feel uncomfortable telling jokes. Remember, you are not paid entertainment, you are there to wish your brother and his wife well.

Good luck!

marty1985

OP, rehearse, rehearse, rehearse!

Don't assume it'll all fall into place and go grand just because you have a few jokes written down. Write the full speech out. Practice it. Read it out loud in front of a few people, this will help you know what works and what doesn't. On the day, or the night before, you might even be able to do a dry run in the hotel, without the audience. This is what helped me, as I had no experience of public speaking. Knowing what the room would look like, the weight of the microphone etc, helped me to be able to focus on just presenting the speech well.

I agree with the others about focusing too much on being funny - while it's important, it might mess up your speech. Be sincere, personal and heartfelt, throw in some funny anecdotes, and everyone will say it was a nice, funny speech.

Remember - your audience are on your side. Nobody is disinterested, or hoping you mess up. You will get a warm reception, and people will be in good spirits, so the laughs will come.

kayevajo

use this!!
i wrote this for speech i did last year , n it went down a bomb


X was born on june 1st 1977 , he shares his birthday with marlyin Monroe and Alanis morissette ,which is a litlle too ironic I really do think.

Now I wouldn’t say xwas an ugly baby , but hos mother only started getting morning sickness after he was born

I went to x school with x and we were in different classes , he was somewhat of a slow starter , in fact when he was in junior infants he was different to most five year olds, he was 11.

As some of ye know I have some contacts in the school and I was able to get hold of some of his exam answers, here is a few examples,when asked what was capital of france he replied F , asked during a debate what thought of euthinisia he said he didn’t think they were any worse than the youth in Ireland and his answer to who was joan of arc , was noahs sister.

As I got to know x growing up I found myself becoming a bit of a father figure to him , I watched crawl around on his knees, cleaned up after him and saw him drink from a bottle , anyway enough about the stag

Today was for me a very emotional day , as today I witnessed two great occasions , I saw x n x become man and wife in front of their family and friends and ladies and gentlemen , I cant belivev I am about to say this , but x bought a round!! In fairness when we are out he is the first one to put his hand in his pocket ,the only problem is that he keeps it there.

X once rang a premium rate chatline and your one asked him what could she do for him? He replied: Could you ring me back?

Speaking ofthe bride , I must say she is looking stunning today , and well he just looked stunned!

X started going out with x in x I think it was x where they first met? But it took him 3 attempts he told me to finally get her to shift him , first time in the pulpit he went up to her and says are u from the carribean because u is jamacian me crazy, then he goes all fresh prince when one night and says to her is u a parking ticket girl because u got fine written all over u! but the one that stole her heart was when he said to her in geoffs can I take a picture of u so I can show santa what I want for xmas.

As we all know x loves the team that plays in the same city as everton no not tranmare . he was delighted last week because his dad found a video player for him, why u ask because dvds were not invented in 1990 the last time won the league.

Speaking of his house in x he told me one day he got a text from x telling him to hurry home , when he got home he found her in the hall wearing a pair of thigh high boots and a neglige he was thrilled esp when she whispered in to his ear take me upstairs tie me up and u can do whatever u want , so he brought her upstairs tied her up and went to the pub!

He has had many jobs but was also on the dole for 6 months where he spent a lot of time walking the dog. But they actually had another dog before x but he died after jumping into the washing machine , , ah sure at least he died in comfort was x reply

Money started getting tight during these days so he stared selling drugs , I never bought any but loved his answering machine on his phone , hi this is x if u are looking for marijuana press the hash key

He also became addicted to Viagra during this time , it was the hardest 3 weeks of his life

Gatica

I know there's a lot of jokes in there that I'm sure entertained the crowds, but personally I think a heartfelt speech with some anecdotes from his childhood make for best speeches. Keeps the aunties saying aww... and the parents giggling.
Also the majority of the audience often appreciates a shorter speech, even if it is full of laughs.
Also, remember that if they opt for a videographer it may be captured for posterity; so keeping it simpler and shorter will keep you from getting overly nervous and lessen likelihood of any slip-up. As someone mentioned already, they're not there to laugh at your or see you mess up the speech, they're on your side and want to hear what you have to say.

ongarboy

Yes, practice, practice, practice is a must. When I was best man, I rehearsed it 10 + times so that by the time I did it, I was almost able to do it practically from memory. Some lines might look good on paper put when you deliver them out loud, they can just fail so practice will help you assess what will work and get it timed. I really recommend not going beyond 5 (or absolutely max 10)minutes of a speech - all the guests will appreciate it! Finally, as well, have someone (not the groom) listen to your rehearsal after you've practiced solo a few times yourself to get another perspective and suggestions.

Also with the best man's speech, if you are including funny or witty remarks, I would try to use some anecdote that actually has some truth or connection what the groom or bride did/didn't do (ie of course it can be exaggerated or parodied for humourous effect). Lifting a funny story or jokes off the net and putting x or y's name in it may not come across that funny and just look forced especially if not delivered in the right comedic manner.

While kayevajo's speech had a lot of funny lines in it, just replacing x and y's name with OP's bride and groom is not necessarily going to mean it will be equally hilarious for OP's audience. Remember also that successful jokes or witty anecdotes are more about the delivery than the content!

Good luck.

HairMonster

kayevajo's speech obviously worked for him, but I wouldn't use it as a template for your speech. As others have pointed out, it isn't personal, is a bit too long and it is all generic one-liners which are very hard to pull off unless you are an excellent joke-teller. They could just as easily fall flat if you don't naturally have comedic timing. And personally I think some the jokes are a bit unsuitable if there will be older relatives in attendance.

As I said in my earlier post anecdotes that involve the couple, or even just a heartfelt speech, will be much more appreciated and will be easier to tell than one-liners because it doesn't need precision timing.

And don't forget all the traditional best-man duties like thanking the bridesmaids, etc etc. I'm sure you know but thought I'd mention it just in case!

kayevajo

HairMonster wrote: »

kayevajo's speech obviously worked for him, but I wouldn't use it as a template for your speech. As others have pointed out, it isn't personal, is a bit too long and it is all generic one-liners which are very hard to pull off unless you are an excellent joke-teller. They could just as easily fall flat if you don't naturally have comedic timing. And personally I think some the jokes are a bit unsuitable if there will be older relatives in attendance.

As I said in my earlier post anecdotes that involve the couple, or even just a heartfelt speech, will be much more appreciated and will be easier to tell than one-liners because it doesn't need precision timing.

And don't forget all the traditional best-man duties like thanking the bridesmaids, etc etc. I'm sure you know but thought I'd mention it just in case!

Just a couple of points to make in response!

First off, it was never my intention for OP to use the speech as a template, I just uploaded it so he could pick something out of it ,if
he wanted to. My speech was very personal , it's just the style I choose on the day. The people who were there got the jokes as there was an element of truth to them and the people who didn't get the element of truth thought the jokes were funny , even the priest! 
The reason it's in a joke style is because the brides father had passed on and her mother made a speech on his behalf and the grooms uncle had died recent enough so there was no point me going down the sentimental route , we ha already been there.

Also I would disagree with some of the things ye said. The person who should make the aunties go aahhh is not the best man but the groom himself.more often than not the best man won't even know the aunties or uncles so it's up to the groom to know what humour they would like. 

But I would say one thing, you have to gauge what u say on the day according to the reaction and the crowd, that's vital. I didnt actually use the joke about him tying her up because it didn't seem right. I dropped it at the last second. 

Another thing I did was put the page down and spoke from the heart for about 1 minute wishing them all the best. That went down well also. 

Good luck to u OP, and another thing that helps, DRINK n lots of it!!

HairMonster

@kayevajo: well, you did start off by saying say "use this!!"...

I wasn't criticising the speech for you - like I said it clearly worked for you - but it's just not going to suit most people. Most people are nervous and just can't pull off one-liners at the best of times, but personal anecdotes are more comfortable to relate and will still be amusing.

But just to respond to your comment "more often than not the best man won't even know the aunties or uncles"... exactly!!! That's why the best man should play it safe unless he knows better. I've been to weddings where the BM speech had risqué jokes and they fell flat because everyone was really uncomfortable knowing the parents, the priest & great-aunt Nelly were there. It worked for you because you knew it would be fine, but most people should avoid like the plague.

Great advise on gauging the reactions, BTW.