Asking a girl out at work - need help

davlar87

Hi everyone,

I have been doing an internship in a company now for 11 weeks, and this coming week is my twelfth and final week. A girl who works there peaked my interest very early on. At that time (the third week), I hadn't really had a proper chance to speak to her. Perhaps misguidedly, I decided to leave her a note at her desk asking her out. I put the note in an envelope along with an origami butterfly. She emailed me and said 'she was kinda seeing someone else' but that she appreciated the gesture.

She later revealed to me that she thought I was only 18 years old at the time I asked her out and we laughed about that. Anyway, since that time I have gotten to know her really well. We, along with other work people, have lunch every day at 1pm. I have detected some definite signs that she is interested in me, but I can't be 100 per cent certain.

One important note in all of this is the fact that I am going away to do a masters in September to the UK. This girl has asked me if I intended to return to Ireland afterwards, and she has brought up the fact that I am leaving a couple of times in passing. I wonder if she doesn't want to get too close, knowing that I will inevitably be heading off?

So the final week is here, and I really want to ask her out. I feel that if I don't, I'll regret it. At the same time, we've become great friends and I don't want to compromise that. So in summary, here are my questions:

1. Should I ask her out?
2. If so, should I do it at work on the last day or get her number and do it the next week?

I would really appreciate any help you can give me with this. I've been thinking about her so much recently. Please help.

Dean820

Go for it!

Get her facebook or phone number on the last day and then ask her to go for a few drinks, just the two of you.

Let me know how you get on.

karaokeman

Do it.

You will be happy with your decision no matter what the outcome.

If she's not interested, remember that God loves a trier.

If she is interested, I salute you.

I am a friend

No dont ask her out. She already told you she isnt interested. I think she relaxed with you once she told you she was seeing someone and is asking out of politeness about your course...

KnocKnocKnock

I wouldn't. That might work if the mindset was "sure feic it, let's just go on a couple of dates and have a bit of a laugh" but you sound like you really like her and would be looking to have a relationship with her.. but in a matter of weeks you're moving country for the year. I just don't think the circumstances are right.

Plus since you already asked her out I think she would have been more flirty with you if she liked you (after that misunderstanding was cleared up). I think you should just keep her as a friend and look forward to meeting lots of nice ladies in the UK.

Distorted

Honestly I wouldn't. I think if she was interested, she would come to you and say "Hey, what about that date then?". You asked her once, she turned you down, she told you she was seeing someone else, you're going away for at least a year possibly more. I think she's only being friendly towards you because she admires your courage in asking her out and she feels bad for turning you down - but don't mistake that for romantic interest. Why not add her on Facebook or something and keep in touch with her and see where time takes you?

Gator

Yeah, the whole 'Kinda seeing someone else' thing threw me...

although you have nothing lose, decision: Do it

davlar87

I really appreciate all the input so far, but it's tied at 3-3 in terms of opinions. Both sides' reasons are good. Does anyone else have a view?

zxcvbnm1

davlar87 wrote: »

I really appreciate all the input so far, but it's tied at 3-3 in terms of opinions. Both sides' reasons are good. Does anyone else have a view?

Well - if you wanna take on the attitude of nothing ventured and all that then certainly do ask her out.

However - you have asked her out already and she said she is seeing someone.
Do you doubt that was true? Why?

Either it was true and it still remains to be true.
Or if it wasn't true then she just fed you a line to spare your feelings.

Either way it seems she is against teh idea of gettin together with you.

I feel that if she has changed here mind since though that she would probably have dropped the hint that she was no longer seeing someone.

To be honest - you are probbaly leaving in 6 weeks time anyway.So i am not sure what can come of the whole thing anyway.

But i suppose if you really want t get it out of your system and you ask and she says no, then life goes on and it is no real big deal really.
But going by the info you gave us i think there is no reason to think she has changed her mind.
Saying that - it is you who knows here so maybe you are seeing a vibe there.