Asking out a close friend?

TowlieMcD

I'm not sure if this is the right place for this or whether there already is a thread but anyway...

Ok so i've been really good friends with this girl for about the last 4 years. About two years ago i realised i liked her and one night i expressed my feelings to her and luckily she admitted she liked me a bit as well. She said we would try it for a while and if it worked out we could go out together.

However i was around 16 at the time and because she was my best friend i didn't know how to make the relationship work and was hoping it wouldn't be awkward but thats exactly what I turned it into and i made a balls of it! She said it would be better if we went back to being friends.

Luckily the friendship remained intact, but i still continued to like her and it was driving me mad that we were only friends. We had our own personal jokes and things between us and I still really wanted us to be a couple :mad:. So a few months later i expressed my feelings to her again after a few of my friends told me they thought she liked me as we seemed to have been flirting and getting along better than usual but long story short i got shot down again.:o

I'm now 19 and the last year has been spent with college and i'd moved on from her and got with plenty of girls. A serious year was had :P , but i never went out with any of them.

But now summer has come back along again and because she's still my friend(18 now) i'm seeing her a good bit and thought i was beginning to like her again but i put it from my mind. However now she's asked me to her DEBS... Her older sister has also been giving me hints on nights out telling me she knows I still like her and all this and that we should get together. They tell each other everything so i've been giving nothing away. So now i'm stuck in a dilemma. I don't know whether i should go for it again or not to. I don't want to get shot down a third time and look like a fool in front of everyone. But i feel if anything's gonna happpen it'll be on me to make the first move.

Sorry for the awful speal! Probably bored a few of ye! Opinions would be appreciated

Miss Fluff

I think rather than putting pressure on yourself ahead of the event and deciding definitively you are going to make a move, why don't you go to the Debs and see how the evening unfolds and if you're getting some vibes off her?

TowlieMcD

Yeah that what was my plan but just thought i'd post it here to see if anyone else had any other views. Thanks

lace

Hi OP!

Turning a friendship into a relationship can be really difficult but if you both like each other then all that's needed is the chemistry. Needless to say the debs could be the perfect time to tell her how you feel but I'd advise against making the decision to "go for it" or not before the night. If it's right and there's chemistry between you you'll know.

Just an aside - you said you went off to college and didn't see her much during the year. If you were to start a relationship with her how would college affect it? Is she planning to go to a college in the same city? Could ye deal with it being long distance if she's not? I know it's not anywhere near that point yet but, seeing as ye've been friends for years and don't want to lose the relationship ye already have, it could be something to consider.

Good Luck!