Paniced and didn't go to work today.

LegacyUser

Hi,

So i've been working in my job for the last 5 months as an intern. About 2 months ago I was kind of thrown into the deepend and told to learn something new. As time progressed I turned out to be the only person working on this project with nobody else in the office having any experience in the area.

So, at first I thought it was ok that I should be able for it. But, recently i've come to realise I still have a lot to learn and that the deadline for the project is looming and there's still so much to do.

I'm kind of pissed with my boss also as this is a large project (paying well) for them but yet for one (important) part of the project they threw an intern at it with no previous experience in the area. I had a brief panic a couple of weeks ago and kind of said something, and asked was there anybody to help me? he just gave me 10 mins with a guy he know to help me with any issues I was having? What I really wanted was another resource to do some of the work and that was the message that I sent across. I think it just fell on deaf ears.

Yesterday I just paniced in work and couldn't stop thinking about leaving and never coming back. So, this morning when my alarm went off I just couldn't get up and go to work. I'm still in bed now.. feeling ashamed, depressed and worried all in one. I turned my phone off and didn't call in sick or anything. I'm just so caught up now.

The reason I didn't go in was that i'd be afraid I wouldn't be able to do the work. now, the situation is a hell of a lot worse, one more day down and i'm going to have to explain why i didn't turn up today.

Part of my just wants to never go back and just tell them that i'm crap and they'd be better of without me.

I know that I need to go and talk to my boss straight away and tell him my situation. I'm just frightened that he'll just freak out with my cause the project is due.

Any ideas on what to do, i'm really freaking out here!?

Thanks.

JonathanAnon

First of all, definitley dont just leave and never go back.. This would be cowardly might set a dangerous precedent for yourself.. i.e. that it's okay to run away from your problems..

All you have done wrong so far is not to show up for one day's work.. You should sit down with your boss, apologise and explain that you were simply stressed out with all the pressure that you were under.. That you DID ask but what was offered to you was not sufficient.... If it was me I would probably try and to call/meet up with the boss this evening and explain the situation.. rather than having it hanging over your head trying to sleep tonight..

You just need to take control of the situation

LegacyUser

Is an Intern unpaid work experience?

If so, not big deal. They more than likely have you on that project not really expecting you to be able to do it anyway. If it was important they'd have someone paid to do it.

Just go in tomorrow and tell them your phone was stolen or something. Hide your phone for a few weeks.

I wouldn't be taking a non-paid job seriously. You work for money. All this Intern nonsense is just exploitation.

CrazyRabbit

Write down all your concerns about the project. Identify which you are able to take care of yourself and which you need assistance with. Give the list to the boss.

By doing this, you are putting the responsibility on the boss's shoulders, and not carrying it yourself. If the project is important enough, the boss will get you the help you need. If the boss doesn't help, go to his/her boss and present your concerns.

As an intern, it is not fair to expect you to be able to carry a project on your own. Stand up for yourself.

Overheal

Do your best, understanding that if it goes tits up that it's their fault.

LegacyUser

Hi Guys, thanks for the response.

I guess I should really go in tomorrow and chat to my boss and tell him whats happening.

For clairification, I am a 6 month intern but I am getting paid.

I have done this before, through my last few years in college I often get really low and stay in bed for like a week and hardly eat/speak to anybody. When I get into these states it's like there's nobody or anything that can pull me out of it. I've just noticed it takes time and it passes.

It's something that has been on my mind for a while and i've often thought that I may be bipolar..i've just been reading up online and I think I fit the bill, although I'm no expert!!

I saw a counsellor before but we never discussed this. I think I might go and see her in the morning if possible and then see my boss.

A lot of people say a lot of these mental illnesses are just excuses for various behaviours. I don't think this isn't the case with me as I really LOVE my job and college course. This job is a really good opportunity for me and I could have just thrown all that out the window today!!

mvt

First of all,fair play to you for being so concerned about the project in the first place.Somewhere down the line this is going to stand to you.
If this is a WPP or Jobbridge internship just tell your boss he has put you in an untenable position and that you are no longer willing to continue.Then tell FAS or the SW exactly what happened and let them deal with it.
What sort of company would put you in that position? Is this really where you would want to work?

Ooops,sorry,didnt see your post above.

Outkast_IRE

Freakout123 wrote: »

Hi Guys, thanks for the response.

I guess I should really go in tomorrow and chat to my boss and tell him whats happening.

For clairification, I am a 6 month intern but I am getting paid.

I have done this before, through my last few years in college I often get really low and stay in bed for like a week and hardly eat/speak to anybody. When I get into these states it's like there's nobody or anything that can pull me out of it. I've just noticed it takes time and it passes.

It's something that has been on my mind for a while and i've often thought that I may be bipolar..i've just been reading up online and I think I fit the bill, although I'm no expert!!

I saw a counsellor before but we never discussed this. I think I might go and see her in the morning if possible and then see my boss.

A lot of people say a lot of these mental illnesses are just excuses for various behaviours. I don't think this isn't the case with me as I really LOVE my job and college course. This job is a really good opportunity for me and I could have just thrown all that out the window today!!

I have experienced alot of the same problems as you, especially when im put under prolonged stress i tend to get very low and have had to take time off of work once or twice in order to be able to level myself out, but in the end the best thing to do is just grit your teeth and go to work , be very disiplined with yourself.

running away from it just leads to more stress as you cant even enjoy the time you have off whilst worrying about going back to work.

What helps me is to have small things lined up to look forward too , be it a weekend away or tickets to a gig, or planning to go see a movie your looking forward to it helps you get up in the morning as you can say to yourself i need to save up so i can go etc.

Just go in to work op , the longer you leave it the worse it will be.

experiMental

freakout123 wrote: »

Hi,

So i've been working in my job for the last 5 months as an intern. About 2 months ago I was kind of thrown into the deepend and told to learn something new. As time progressed I turned out to be the only person working on this project with nobody else in the office having any experience in the area.

So, at first I thought it was ok that I should be able for it. But, recently i've come to realise I still have a lot to learn and that the deadline for the project is looming and there's still so much to do.

I'm kind of pissed with my boss also as this is a large project (paying well) for them but yet for one (important) part of the project they threw an intern at it with no previous experience in the area. I had a brief panic a couple of weeks ago and kind of said something, and asked was there anybody to help me? he just gave me 10 mins with a guy he know to help me with any issues I was having? What I really wanted was another resource to do some of the work and that was the message that I sent across. I think it just fell on deaf ears.

Yesterday I just paniced in work and couldn't stop thinking about leaving and never coming back. So, this morning when my alarm went off I just couldn't get up and go to work. I'm still in bed now.. feeling ashamed, depressed and worried all in one. I turned my phone off and didn't call in sick or anything. I'm just so caught up now.

The reason I didn't go in was that i'd be afraid I wouldn't be able to do the work. now, the situation is a hell of a lot worse, one more day down and i'm going to have to explain why i didn't turn up today.

Part of my just wants to never go back and just tell them that i'm crap and they'd be better of without me.

I know that I need to go and talk to my boss straight away and tell him my situation. I'm just frightened that he'll just freak out with my cause the project is due.

Any ideas on what to do, i'm really freaking out here!?

Thanks.

First of all, bad management happens everywhere, so it's not a surprise that you're put in this situation. The ultimate question is, do you want to work in your current company or the area associated with your internship? Also, does your company guarantee the opportunity to get hired for a paid position? It is sometimes the company culture of imposing tight deadlines, but maybe that's the best way for that company to stay in business? You really have to think about these things first and foremost, and decide whether you would like to work in this kind of environment. If you don't, then definitely talk to your boss. Otherwise, try to come up with a plan to resolve your problem.

Maybe even try to contact experts in that area and see what they think. Are there academics in your college or any educational institution where you were studying, who are proficient in your problem areas? If there are, they are the best port of call, because they are most likely not to compete against your business.

I must say, though, that you are having an opportunity in this case. It's vital in today's workplace to deal with complex situations like the one you've mentioned. Things will rarely go to plan, so it's good to be able to put those things in order. I wish you all the best!

Catch_22

Freakout123 wrote: »

Hi Guys, thanks for the response.

I guess I should really go in tomorrow and chat to my boss and tell him whats happening.

this is exactly what you should do, make him aware there is a potential problem as early as possible

beks101

Hi OP,

I sympathise with you as I also work in a high-stress environment and as an intern / new graduate I used to deal with things in the same way as you. I'd let things build up in work to the point where I felt totally overwhelmed, alone and basically doomed to failure.

What you have to realise though, is that your professional reputation is on the line, and if you don't straighten out this behaviour and nip it in the bud at this stage, it could become a habit and jeopardise future opportunities. As an intern you need to be seen to be reliable, steady and devoted to the job in order to move forward and while from reading your posts, it sounds like you are maybe too devoted and letting the stress affect your mental well-being, to your boss, your unexplained absence is just that...unexplained absence.

So the first thing I would do when you go back in is personally apologise and have a damn good excuse on hand. Then, deal with the work situation.

What helped me to overcome the sense of panic, stress, wide-eyed terror that I'd face when dealing with a mountain of urgent requests, projects and tight deadlines...was to get serious about my problem-solving skills. For me, that meant becoming uber-practical and dealing with every little issue right then and there, rather than putting things to one side and hoping they'd disappear, and then facing the wrath of a p1ssed off colleague/client/boss because I hadn't dealt with something efficiently. It may mean learning to say no. Keep a notepad with two sheets on the go at all times - one for 'urgent to-do's and one for less urgent to-dos.

If the tasks are creeping up and are simply too much for one person to do, take action and deal with it right at that second - send an email to your boss outlining your workload and what you are working on as a matter of priority and how long that is going to take. Then call over to him/her and explain your predicament and how you don't want the quality of your work to slide as a result of an overload. Smile, be gracious, polite and apologetic, but make no bones about it. It's a good skill to develop early on in your career, as these are issues that everyone in a professional environment will face and they're not worth the stress that they are causing you. And trust me, your boss will respect you all the more for it.

And definitely get in touch with your counsellor. What you described in your last post sounds like depressive episodes and in that case it's not a matter of pulling yourself up by the boot straps and just copping yourself on - you need to seek whatever professional help those issues require. But addressing this issue in the work place will improve your stress level and confidence enormously and is definitely a good start.

Best of luck and don't beat yourself up about this. Stress does funny things to people.