Advice please - stuck between a rock and a hard place

LegacyUser

Sorry it's long, but it's complicated and I wanted to get the facts straight up front

My husband and I moved to the US in June. He has a temporary work permit, and his company promised that we would BOTH have permanent work permits by September. The move was agreed last July (12 months ago now), *entirely* contingent upon them getting me a work permit. They claimed it was a high priority for them (my arse).

We've been told that oops, no work permit in Sept. It's now March 2012 at best, and frankly, I even doubt that date. They've got him here working, and why should they care about some employee's wife?

I was devastated to leave my job, my friends and my family - I never wanted to leave, but I did it for him. He claims that as a software engineer, working in Silicon Valley is a lifelong dream (not that he even likes his job, but he likes that it lets him be in SV).

I also have NO interest in not working. My career is important to me: it provides security, prospects, self esteem, and independence. By the time March 2012 rolls around, I'll have been out of work for seventeen months (disclosure: we took a few months to go traveling since we thought we'd be fine come September 2011, idiotic in hindsight). Seventeen months out of work is going to be the death knell for my career - who's going to hire somebody who's been out of the loop for that long?

Filling my days/ volunteering/ making friends aren't the answer. My primary concern is how being out of work is going to affect my job prospects. I work a regular number-crunching type job, so trust me, there aren't any qualifications I can do to help with my future job search, and there isn't any volunteering that is professionally beneficial.

As I see it there are 3 options: (1) cut our losses and go home, (2) I wait around for the supposed visa and hope my career is salvageable, or (3) I get sponsorship (obviously impossible in the US as I am no kind of specialist).

So what say you, people of Boards? I honestly don't know whose happiness is more important here

(Just to note: my motivation isn't monetary, so don't worry about earning more here vs. there, who's the breadwinner etc. )

moco

Would your husband actually be open to moving home?

LostinKildare

Did the company put it in writing that they would secure a work permit for you by September?
What reason did they give for not doing so?
Is is still possible for them to fulfill the promise but they're refusing to, or is March 2011 the earliest that it can be obtained because they missed some deadline?

If the promise of a work permit for you formed part of their employment contract with your husband, then you should seek legal advice -- clearly if they cannot deliver the permit in Sept, they should compensate you for loss of wages from Sept to whenever they do deliver the permit. It'll pressure them to deliver on their promise as soon as they can, and you can point to this legal back-and-forth to explain the gap in your career. If they pay out a settlement, you can use the money to travel or whatever until you get the work permit and can begin to work.

Pebbles68

I would suggest option 1 is out of the question, neither of you would have jobs in Ireland at the moment.

Surely there must be some course you could study to make the most of your time out of work. You say there is nothing that can help in your number crunching career but there must be something you can do that is somehow related. I'm thinking of some sort of certificate or diploma in accountancy or finance. Or maybe look at an industry that does interest you and see what you can do. At least when eventually the work permit does come you have something to offer an employer and you'll be filling your time constructively.

Wompa1

Pebbles68 wrote: »

I would suggest option 1 is out of the question, neither of you would have jobs in Ireland at the moment.

Surely there must be some course you could study to make the most of your time out of work. You say there is nothing that can help in your number crunching career but there must be something you can do that is somehow related. I'm thinking of some sort of certificate or diploma in accountancy or finance. Or maybe look at an industry that does interest you and see what you can do. At least when eventually the work permit does come you have something to offer an employer and you'll be filling your time constructively.

Not necessarily true. He'd get a job pretty handy back in Ireland. Not so sure about an accountant.

I know you don't want to volunteer but just to get a possible company suitor...why not do an internship free of charge just to ensure there's no blip on your CV? I can understand your frustration due to the gap.

Overheal

Your husband could always Work to Rule, or refuse to go in. The entire offer was contingent on both permits. They havent lived up to that. Therefore, the original agreement was never met. Seek the advice of a law firm, and possibly the Irish Embassy. Here's the Consulate's US site:

http://www.irishconsulate.org/home/index.aspx?id=48549

LegacyUser

thanks for the replies, guys.

Legal action: he didn't get it in writing. I WISH we had had the cop on to do that. The company was just so overwhelmingly positive about the process; they made it seem so simple. They told us that between their name, expensive lawyers, his phd, paying for premium processing, and being a Silicon Valley company, these things get pushed through no problem. They told us eight months from the start of the process, which is advertising the role. Guess what they haven't done? Advertised the role. They haven't even written a job spec yet. It should have been done by January, and in December they swore blind it would be. Come March, his boss still hadn't done it - saying he forgot, it slipped his mind. The move was all in motion at that point, so we still moved in June, when it turned out that (a) it still wasn't done and (b) his boss then quit. At this point he freaked out and camped out at the in-house lawyer's desk telling her he would write it himself to speed it up. It's now in the head of departments inbox, and understandably, it's not at the top of that guy's list either. Since their lawyers have told us I get my work permit eight months from the day of filing, every day they delay it is another day it gets pushed back.

Internship: I'm absolutely going to try this. I've found one so far but there's a major challenge in the system here - internships are serious busines here, and are linked to universities for the most part. They qualify for college credit and specify that you must be enrolled in a four year program in a university. So I'll try to convince them to give me a mercy internship/ that I'd be way more useful than a student, but it may not work out.

More college: I'd have loved this. I'd love to go do another Masters. College starts in August here, and the application deadlines were December 2010. I'm guessing the same for things like Accountancy courses/exams, but I'm absolutely going to look into it

niceoneted

Just throwing it out there. Did you actually hear it from the company yourself or was/is it your husband passing on the information? Perhaps they never intended getting you a work permit but that he was so intend on going there that that's what he said/made up!

Would you be open to coming home on your own if your husband is not interested in leaving?

LegacyUser

niceoneted wrote: »

Just throwing it out there. Did you actually hear it from the company yourself or was/is it your husband passing on the information? Perhaps they never intended getting you a work permit but that he was so intend on going there that that's what he said/made up!

Would you be open to coming home on your own if your husband is not interested in leaving?

It was my husband passing the info on. I didn't have any reason to doubt him or the company when this was all agreed, and I hope to god there's nothing as sinister as that kind of deceit from his end going on :-/

Coming home on my own - as in splitting up and he stays in the US? That's obviously the last resort. Or do you mean would I be open to sitting out this waiting period back home without him?

Overheal

Can your husband apply to other companies in the valley that will offer you a work permit?