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  • 17-07-2011 3:47pm
    #1
    Lamposts
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,346 ✭✭✭


    So I just finished a 2 year relationship with someone and now she's falling apart. Going on coke benders. She tried throwing herself under a train and od'd as well. She text me yesterday by asking how I was after the break up. I said fine and what about you? Then she told me all this stuff. I've seen a recent picture of her and she looks like a junkie now. Shaved some of her hair off. Anyway, there was always problems with the relationship. she'd go in random moods. These texts have really disturbed. I did my best and told her to get it together. I don't want anything to do with her anymore. I had enough for 2 years so I don't feel bad about not wanting anything to do with her. I just don't know what to do. my hands are shaking, i feel like getting sick and crying. I don't know what I'm posting this for. Just looking for someone to say this is what you have to do and you're sorted..


Comments

  • #2
    tallaghtmick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,724 ✭✭✭tallaghtmick


    Try your best not to upset her more but she needs to know its over,this is her way of trying to get you back,if she persists I would cut all contact i.e new number or block hers.


  • #3
    Lamposts
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,346 ✭✭✭Lamposts


    I don't know if this is all about getting me back. Even in the relationship she was mostly depressed and stuff. Maybe it was me that set her off? I told her dont contact me again until she sorts herself out properly..


  • #4
    judgefudge
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 915 ✭✭✭judgefudge


    I'd make sure other people (her friends or family) are aware of what is happening and then back off. You need her to know that its over or she'll stay emotionally dependant on you. She's their problem not yours (don't mean for that to sound harsh). Try not to blame yourself. People are responsible for their own lives.


  • #5
    tallaghtmick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,724 ✭✭✭tallaghtmick


    Lamposts wrote: »
    I don't know if this is all about getting me back. Even in the relationship she was mostly depressed and stuff. Maybe it was me that set her off? I told her dont contact me again until she sorts herself out properly..

    Thats a start,to me she needs counselling for her depression,if she contacts you again try say this to her in a nice way and that you will try be a friend for her if she does.


  • #6
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    tallaghtmick wrote: »
    Thats a start,to me she needs counselling for her depression,if she contacts you again try say this to her in a nice way and that you will try be a friend for her if she does.

    I wouldn't do that - not the "be a friend" bit anyway. That's a recipe for disaster, because it invites her to drag him into her "counselling efforts". This is manipulative behaviour, and the safest way to deal with it is not to deal with it.


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  • #7
    tallaghtmick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,724 ✭✭✭tallaghtmick


    Deleted User wrote: »
    I wouldn't do that - not the "be a friend" bit anyway. That's a recipe for disaster, because it invites her to drag him into her "counselling efforts". This is manipulative behaviour, and the safest way to deal with it is not to deal with it.

    Yeah but hes clearly a clever lad he wouldnt fall for that.


  • #8
    Lamposts
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,346 ✭✭✭Lamposts


    Deleted User wrote: »
    I wouldn't do that - not the "be a friend" bit anyway. That's a recipe for disaster, because it invites her to drag him into her "counselling efforts". This is manipulative behaviour, and the safest way to deal with it is not to deal with it.

    Thanks. I'm just gonna ignore her from now on and move on with my life. Just hope my next GF is sane. At the same time, it's hard to ignore it as well but I'll have to.


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