how much to give to the groom

granty1892

hi,
i'm doing best man to my brother, he's getting married in two weeks but i'm unsure as to how much i should give him?? it's from me and my girlfriend.

We bought a picture frame that cost €50 but we've been told just to give €200 aswell and that should well enough??!
the groomsman my other brother is giving €100.

thanks

Sergio

All depends on how much you can afford.If your the bestman then you would have to give a bigger present imo.I got married last may and my brother gave me €500 as our wedding present.

Toots

Just because you're the best man doesn't mean you have to give a bigger gift at all. Give what you can afford, if it's €50, then it's €50. If you wanted to top it up by another €50 to match your other brother then that's fine, seeing as the gift is from both you and your girlfriend. I'm sure your brother wouldn't want you to be put under pressure financially just to give you a present.

Diddler1977

Give what you can afford. There is no reason why you should be giving more just because you are a groomsman or a best man.

My bridesmaid (sister) gave me two amazing pics for our wedding, prob cost less then 100 euro - but I value them more then the money.

You are carrying out a very special role for them which I am sure they value for this.

Enjoy the day!

granty1892

thanks for the replies!

gaeilgebeo

granty1892 wrote: »

hi,
i'm doing best man to my brother, he's getting married in two weeks but i'm unsure as to how much i should give him?? it's from me and my girlfriend.

We bought a picture frame that cost €50 but we've been told just to give €200 aswell and that should well enough??!
the groomsman my other brother is giving €100.

thanks

I think it depends on your own financial circumstances.
Are you and your girlfriend unemployed?

granty1892

we both work but i've decided to give €200 its what we can afford and seems the most reasonable taking everything onboard

gaeilgebeo

granty1892 wrote: »

we both work but i've decided to give €200 its what we can afford and seems the most reasonable taking everything onboard

That's a generous gift, especially if you're both working.
I thought €50 was a bit on the mean side.
Enjoy the day.

gimmick

Never mention money in this forum. People take offense to it.

If you are best man, you have to get a decent present. If a best man gave €50, he should be shot.

denhaagenite

I think whatever you can afford is the best really. We didn't get anything from our best man- we didn't want a gift but I'm a big one for cards and was disappointed at how many people actually don't give any at all . That's what you can remember the day by, really enjoy looking through them now, one or two even make me tear up when I read them

Toots

denhaagenite wrote: »

I think whatever you can afford is the best really. We didn't get anything from our best man- we didn't want a gift but I'm a big one for cards and was disappointed at how many people actually don't give any at all . That's what you can remember the day by, really enjoy looking through them now, one or two even make me tear up when I read them

Same here, I love getting cards!

tatli_lokma

gimmick wrote: »

Never mention money in this forum. People take offense to it.

If you are best man, you have to get a decent present. If a best man gave €50, he should be shot.

OMG!!! whatever about taking offense to money, I do take offense to saying a best man should be shot for giving €50!

I assume your brother asked you to be best man because you have a good and close relationship - he views you as his best man, his right hand man, the person he can rely upon to help him on his big day. To be asked to be best man is an honour, and you repay that honour by doing a great job, not by handing over a bigger present than everyone else.

I am sure if you told your brother that you feel you must give a bigger present because you are Best man he would be annoyed to think you felt that pressure.

Give what you can afford and are comfortable with. If that is €50 or €200 then that is up to you. But the main thing as Best man is to make the effort to make his day special. No money can match that.

One of my best mates was absolutely invaluable to me on my wedding day (I didn't have bridesmaids). Were it not for her, and knowing I could rely on her I would have been very stressed out. She was a star. That is the best present she could ever give me. She was out of work at the time and gave me €50 present - I honestly didn't even want it, because the help she gave me was invaluable and I alway will cherish that. In fact, I didn't even want the €50 becuase I knew that for her €50 was equivalent to €500 for others, so to repay her wonderful help I brought her with me to the hairdressers on the morning of the wedding and paid for her hair and make up to be done as a thank you.

I don't say this to give a dose of the warm and fuzzies, I only say it to point out that a good best man or bridesmaid gives you the best present they can when they are truly the BEST man to you on the day. That is worth more than €200! It takes more than a funny speach and a good stag night to be a good best man, but do it right and you will have given both your brother and his new wife a present money can't buy.

HairMonster

gaeilgebeo wrote: »

That's a generous gift, especially if you're both working.
I thought €50 was a bit on the mean side.
Enjoy the day.

I agree with what LittleTed said, but I also agree with gaeilgebeo...
Its not about the money, but it should be about the sentiment and would you not want to give something good to your brother on his big day if you can afford it? Its your brother and you are clearly close if you are his best man, and both you & your girlfriend are working. €50 did seem rather mean in that case, €200 sounds about right .

Edit: BTW, in the debate about where you give more because you're best man - just because you are the best man doesn't mean you should give a huge gift, but the fact that you are asked to be best man usually shows that you are very close to the groom and in that respect people probably expect that you would want to give more to the people you're closest to.

Gatica

+1