Not too much confidence? At what case can I put arm around girl? (Close Friend)?

arleitiss

Hey there, I am for 2nd year already afraid to put my arm around girl, she's my very very close friend, we talk a lot, we spend a lot of time together, we tell each other secrets. Every evening when I sit near her, I am wondering if I can put my arm around her. I give her my jacket often, pretending I am not cold, while I am actually, I just want her to feel warm. So I was wondering can I put my arm around her waist? Or would she slap me? She slaps me usually if I start talking about commiting suicide or smoking, if someone smokes and I say give me a smoke , she slaps me saying I will sooner die than let you smoke. So help please? If I could put my arm around her I would feel much better in evenings, instead of sitting and being blown around by wind, I prefer only one my side being cold. So? Please help!!!

Needler

If she already slaps you anyway then sure try it. I don't think you have much to lose

arleitiss

Needler wrote: »

If she already slaps you anyway then sure try it. I don't think you have much to lose

Well I don't know. I might try it today.

curlzy

Hey,

If she's your close friend you might be risking a friendship. I'm not sure what you're actually looking for? Do you want her to be your girlfriend? If so, you should ask her out on a date. If I were you I wouldn't try to pull a move on her unexpectedly because the shock alone could make her react badly. I say lay your cards on the table and be honest, tell her you like her and would like to go on a date, then everyone knows where they stand and you can go from there.

Best of luck.

arleitiss

curlzy wrote: »

Hey,

If she's your close friend you might be risking a friendship. I'm not sure what you're actually looking for? Do you want her to be your girlfriend? If so, you should ask her out on a date. If I were you I wouldn't try to pull a move on her unexpectedly because the shock alone could make her react badly. I say lay your cards on the table and be honest, tell her you like her and would like to go on a date, then everyone knows where they stand and you can go from there.

Best of luck.

Well I saw others doing it, like her classmates, but well classmates are classmates I guess, even though she's with me nicer than with her classmates. We decided to talk about problems today. I got many problems and I know I can tell them to her and she will help. So I though of saying something like I lack decidedivity ( or w/e that word is) or better say I lack decision making to dare and do something. I chicken out when I am in cinema with girl on date. So I thought to say that, she will help I am sure. And I wont be her bf or she my gf. I just don't want that to be so. I am here in Ukraine only for 2 months, don't want her to be left after so we both feel bad.

arleitiss

oh my god, I just came home, and today I kinda lead topic to that.
I went mad, hit wall with hand few times, my fist is bleeding, but then I was talking to that girl, she said well even last year I was wondering why you never put hand around me, so today I found out she always doesnt mind and even wants me to put hand around her and hug her always while I was scared. Now things are sorted out. Guess there is no point asking on Irish or any English forums, since the way people are brought up in Ukraine and in Europe,US is different. Thanks anyways guys/girls.