social anxiety

LegacyUser

I have social anxiety. I haven't been checked out by a doctor well because I'm too afraid to see one. I was always a shy kid and had a few friends, but no close ones really. I had a sheltered life at home. I didn't really play sports or get out much. Now I live by myself and I am a homebody. My anxiety has gotten worse with age. When I was in high school and college I always tried to be early to class because I didn't like and still don't like walking into a room of people. I always feel they are staring at me and thinking things about me. I don't like to go out. I don't have many friends. I only have one friend actually. I am especially awkward around people. I can't look them in the eye. It's worse with men. I get really embarrassed around men. I don't know why. I just wanted to know if there were other people out there like me?

RHJ

This post has been deleted.

karaokeman

I also have really bad social anxiety, your not alone in this world mate.

If its not too personal a question, may I ask what part of the country you live in.

If you live anywhere near Dublin or somewhere urban like that remember there are plenty of pubs in the town and other places to socialise and meet new people.

It is often easier to meet people if you go by yourself, mainly because if your with a group you may feel under pressure and it can be very daunting when the people your with may have more social experience and whatnot.

And you don't need to go to a doctor, a councillor or a psychologist would be a much better choice. Usually these are people who will talk you through your problems, they rarely look down on you and they've met many more people in your shoes so hopefully it will work.

Other than that, maybe go back to college and do a pHD. Try joining clubs and societies and you'll have lots of people to meet with.

CorkMan

I have social anxiety too. When I have to speak in front of people I get a big adrenaline rush and can get it over with, but if I was in a public house and I had to open conversation, I would be uncomfortable.

If I spot another person who seems to have the same problem, ie when college or workmates are sitting down talking, and I am standing against a wall (like in the Savoy in Cork) and another fellas is, I find it easier to break the ice. It comes easier somedays, all the thoughts just get shut out of my head and I SPEAK!! I open my wings and i'd be glad to receive a response. I don't get out an awful lot through ATM.

I'm a big man of 19 stone, so maybe people think I shouldn't have these problems, or less of them, because of my size. I don't know though.

Logical Fallacy

lkjhgfdsa wrote: »

I have social anxiety. I haven't been checked out by a doctor well because I'm too afraid to see one. I was always a shy kid and had a few friends, but no close ones really. I had a sheltered life at home. I didn't really play sports or get out much. Now I live by myself and I am a homebody. My anxiety has gotten worse with age. When I was in high school and college I always tried to be early to class because I didn't like and still don't like walking into a room of people. I always feel they are staring at me and thinking things about me. I don't like to go out. I don't have many friends. I only have one friend actually. I am especially awkward around people. I can't look them in the eye. It's worse with men. I get really embarrassed around men. I don't know why. I just wanted to know if there were other people out there like me?

Hey OP, i've been dealing with very bad anxiety issues for about a year now. Severe panic attacks, general anxiety and around Christmas i developed Agoraphobia as well.

There will be quite a few people in your boat. First up, i would strongly advise you to see a GP. He can make assorted checks to see if there is any physical grounding for you issues.

After that, options will include things like medication or visiting a shrink. Personally, i have been put on Beta Blockers and i find them to be a godsend, i haven't had a really bad anxiety attack since and i have much better control when they do hit me. It took a little trial and error with assorted meds to find what was working for me but it was worth it.

I am doing Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to help me deal with the Agoraphobia and i have to say, i am finding it very beneficial. It's basically about finding the root cause of the issue and dealing with it, finding more suitable ways for the mind to work when such circumstances arise.

My own chain of things that set me off is long and complex...but i am already working through them,and am growing more and more comfortable with being outside.

In fact, just today i had a major breakthrough as i was able to go outside and not feel worried once. It was only a brief trip to the shop but 2 months ago such a trip would have been completely impossible.

I would recommend an online community to help share your experiences but i have to be honest with you, i haven't found a good one yet.

But, long story short, there are loads of us about the place...I'm sure we'd all meet up in real life if we could only find the nerve to say hello to each other.:D

HUNK

Hi OP. There is a thread here on boards you should take a look at in the phobia section http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055649856

I wouldn't feel to down about it as social anxiety is actually more common a problem globally than you think. Being scared to see a doctor is very common for people with SA so don't beat yourself up for this. There is a group in Ireland that has been set up to facilitate people who suffer from SA.
http://socialanxietyireland.com/

This group has been specifically set up to help those who suffer with SA. You can refer yourself to the group by e-mail. I applied myself, but you will likely have to wait roughly 9 - 12 months. There are more details on the site so take a look. They also recommend a self-help book which can be found here http://www.amazon.co.uk/Overcoming-Social-Anxiety-Shyness-Gillian/dp/1849010005/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1309838724&sr=8-1

There is another site I would recommend http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/
Its an American based site but there are a good few Irish people on there (myself included). Check it out anyway as it is filled with people who understand what you're going through.

faceache

This is for the OP who sounds like myself, basically shy! Not sick, just shy. I read this article a long time ago by Terry Prone and thought it was so true

http://www.irishexaminer.com/opinion/columnists/terry-prone/making-a-quiet-stand-for-the-much-maligned-shyness-brigade-94618.html