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How do I move on from her?

  • 27-06-2011 8:40pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    As the title says, how do I move on? We broke up over a year ago and we barely keep in touch - she doesn't even live here anymore - but I cannot stop thinking about her all the time. I thought with time things would get better and they have to an extent - I don't feel the "pain" as much as I did in the beginning but I still think of her everyday. A lot of times I'll be walking down the road, or doing something, or watching a movie and she'll pop into mind and mess with my head.

    Speaking rationally, there's no chance we'll ever be back together. She's moved on I know and even if we somehow had the chance to get back together, I don't know if I'd take it. So why do I feel this way over a year later? It still hurts when I think about her.

    Its not as if we were even going out for that long (~4 months) and it was a very mutual breakup, no bad will on either side (she was moving to Australia for work). I don't want to be one of those guys who spends his life pining over a long lost love but I can't see anyway out of it. I can't seem to meet anyone new. Everyone I compare to her and nobody matches up. I've been on 1 date in the last year and I didn't bother with a 2nd one because it wasn't the same as it was with my ex.

    Advice?


Comments

  • #2
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Basically, what do you want? You say you mightn't take the chance to get back together with her if you were given the option - I think you need to think about that and decide whether you would or not.

    If you can see that you wouldn't be with her again if given the opportunity, it'll be far easier to let her go.

    If you think you would want to - well, could that happen? Is she planning on moving back? You say she has moved on, how do you know that? If she is seeing someone else that's pretty definite but if she is single she may feel similarly.

    You may have little contact with her but it may be time to cut the chord completely. It seems to me that you are hanging onto her a little bit. You need to let go or try make a go of it with her (if that’s possible).


  • #3
    Sibylla
    Closed Accounts Posts: 740 ✭✭✭Sibylla


    Time is a great healer but you have to get yourself out there. No one you date in the future will be your ex, they will be different and that's for the best because there is a reason you are not still together.
    A year can seem like a long time but fill your life with other things, work, college, friends, hobbies and in time you will meet someone new. Good luck!


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