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distinguishing white lies from other lies

  • 22-06-2011 06:19PM
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    i have a very hard time trusting people, and knowing what is and is not a good indicator of trustworthiness. it has resulted in my being burned badly in the past, and i wanted to get some responses so i can maybe find out if i'm on the right track now.

    this fella i like lied to get off the phone by saying he was going to bed he was actually wanting to call me. it was a girl he said it to and i think this girl likes him but i don't know for sure, it may be just playful flirting between them. this happened a few weeks ago and at first i thought it was a white lie but lately i have started to have second thoughts.

    would you think was a non issue or a warning sign? i have been thinking that i'm worrying over nothing but then i saw a comment here today where someone said 'once a liar always a liar', so i'm asking for your thoughts and advice.


Comments

  • #2
    Kevin Duffy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    trustless wrote: »
    i have a very hard time trusting people, and knowing what is and is not a good indicator of trustworthiness. it has resulted in my being burned badly in the past, and i wanted to get some responses so i can maybe find out if i'm on the right track now.

    this fella i like lied to get off the phone by saying he was going to bed he was actually wanting to call me. it was a girl he said it to and i think this girl likes him but i don't know for sure, it may be just playful flirting between them. this happened a few weeks ago and at first i thought it was a white lie but lately i have started to have second thoughts.

    would you think was a non issue or a warning sign? i have been thinking that i'm worrying over nothing but then i saw a comment here today where someone said 'once a liar always a liar', so i'm asking for your thoughts and advice.

    Do I read this right - he was talking to someone, but wanted to end the call so that he could call you instead? Have I got it right? If so, it sounds like a small fib in order to end a call without being brutally tactless ( "I have to go now, I want to talk to somone else more than I want to talk to you" just isn't that friendly :) ) and nothing more than that. If there's no more to it than that, I think you may be reading more into it than is there to be read.


  • #3
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    thank you for your response!

    fair enough, that makes sense alright. i end convos all the time without making up reasons or giving any reason at all, but shure youre probably right its nothing to worry about. so long as no one would class him as a liar for it thats good enough for me. thanks again!


  • #4
    Oryx
    Subscribers Posts: 19,421 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    I think youre mistaking tact for deceit. In everyday life we all tell white lies in order to not offend people and keep things running smoothly. Its so common, half the time we dont even acknowledge we do it.

    I would not let something like that worry you at all. The guy isnt a liar as such, he seems like he was just being tactful.


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