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Sad

  • 18-06-2011 5:34am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    I don't know how much longer I can go on like this.
    I've lost all control now. I don't even know what I hope to achieve from this.
    My life is just full of regret. I can't seem to put it right.
    I guess I'm just looking for help. I actually enjoy this self loathing. Far from the person I used to be. And has anyone noticed. No. My life is in ****ing taters.
    I disgust myself with who I am.
    It's taken me around 40 mins to type this. Reading it back has helped. I won't kill myself soon. I just wish people could enter my mind. I've been sad for so long.
    People have died in my life, a long time ago, and I still can't forget.
    I just wish I could feel like I used to. Happy. I haven't been happy for so long, and nobody even realises.
    I'm ranting here, but I don't think I can come back from this. Unless someone can bring me back in time. There's so much I wish I'd said.
    I don't know why I'm even tying this. I'm probably hoping for a resolution.
    But it won't happen now I doubt. I hope people realise I was trying to be nice and I loved them all.
    I'll feel so bad about it because I've seen how it is, but I honestly can't anymore. It's actually so hard. I wish I could just go back in time.
    I'm so sorry for all of what I caused. I never thought this would happen to me.
    It's taken me so long to type this you wouldn't believe but I feel better for it.
    I can't see myself lasting though. It's just how things went. I.m so sorry for everything. I just can't cope like this. It's my fault and don't blame anyone.
    I just really wish I could have been who I should have been.
    Sorry I'm talking to people in my post but I really feel so sad.


Comments

  • #2
    Oryx
    Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    Sad, I don't know how familiar you are with this forum, but we never allow threads from people who are suicidal. I'm not sure from your post whether you are or not, but you are certainly in a low place. We can sympathise and reply, but noone here is qualified or knows you well enough to help. You need someone in real life who can give you proper help and advice and untangle your problems and state of mind. We are just not equipped here to do that. Im glad you got some things off your chest. I ask you to reach out to an organisation or individual who can help. That may be your doctor, a friend or family member, or somewhere like www.aware.ie. There are other helpful stickies at the top of the forum page.

    I am closing your thread but rest assured this is not because we don't care, but because we do.


This discussion has been closed.
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