no contact for 2 weeks

LegacyUser

the boyfriend and i (we started going out in January) decided to break up for the summer because he's in America and I'm going interrailing around Europe, but the plan was to get back together when college starts up again in early September. This is fairly common thing to do among students who are heading away for the summer.

Anyway, we decided to start this break from when college ended, because he was leaving 2 days later. College ended two weeks ago and there's been no contact. Is this unusual? He's not really my boyfriend anymore so i suppose i can't really expect contact everyday, but is 2 weeks not a bit too long? There was no text to say goodbye, or have fun interrailing or anything like that.
Am i reading too much into this or is this normal behaviour?

LegacyUser

I'm kind of in the same situation. We're both going to America this summer (although not in the same area he's going north I'm going South). He kinda said he didn't want long distance, so I wished him a great summer he said the same to me and we left it there.

It was like 3 weeks ago or something. Right after college was over. He hasn't contacted me since not even when the exam results were released. I thought I'd be wondering how they went but he didn't even bother contacting me.

I think you should let me make the first move you don't wanna sound desperate or clingy. After all, you both agreed to split during summertime so the fact that he hasn't contacted you is a bit understandable because the purpose of this " break " is to live your summer separately. What would be the point of breaking up if you guys were to be in contact during summer ? None. That wouldn't be a break up.
I guess that was part of the territory. You're not a couple anymore. Plus, guys are more practical especially in case of break up, they won't contact you unless they have something really important to tell you.

The point of this was for you guys to be independent during summer if you text it's like you're still a couple and that would undermine the whole purpose. I'm pretty sure you're still in the back of his mind but let him breathe, it's summer if you contact him there's a pretty good chance you're gonna annoy him and your temporary break-up will convert to a permanent one.

Be independent I'm sure he'll contact you first. After all, it's only been two weeks. But if he doesn't contact you at all, and you're the one in September contacting him first, then if I were you I'd second-guess the whole relationship.

Good luck.

ElleEm

Had you both said you'd keep in contact during your "break"?
Unless you have, then you will probably have as much contact as any ex boyfriend and girlfriend.

LegacyUser

To be honest I find that a bit harsh....not even sending you a 'have fun' text. Did you send him one? Maybe send him one telling him where you are and ask him how he's getting on. Keep it friendly. You've been with each other 5 months or so. Surely he must be thinking about you too.

Wompa1

Don't make the same mistake I did. Not move on and get with somebody else because you feel too strongly about the other person...she left me high and dry. she got back from her trip and didn't contact me, turned out she got back with an ex who went to visit her on his holiday

Fentdog84

Sorry but if he really wants to contact you, he'd do so. Sounds as if he's used this travelling thing as a part excuse to break up. Id kinda let the whole thing go. been in a similiar situation before, this reunion idea dosent really work because by then either one or both of you will have moved on.

Monkey61

Perhaps because I am a little bit older now (late 20s) I can't really get my head around the "break up for 3 months to do stuff with other people and then get back together". If you like someone and want to be with someone, then be with them.

The concept of "oh we won't enjoy our summer if we can't kiss/sleep with other people" or "we don't trust eachother enough not to have our summer ruined by worrying about the the other cheating" doesn't sit too easily with me. Why should summer be any different to the rest of the year? i would think that if you want to be with other people on holiday, then you probably will the rest of the year round too.

I know I'm being a bit harsh. And I can totally understand someone wanting to have fun/dates etc when they are away. But I can't imagine being with someone for 5 months and being happy for them to do that...unless you aren't really that into them and wouldn't mind the idea of them being with other people anyway.

If you have broken up, then you have broken up. As has been said already, you can't necessarily expect friendly contact from someone you have broken up with.

I think, you should get on with your life, enjoy your summer and be prepared for the fact that you may not be getting back together. And be careful if you do, if you really like this guy, that you are not just a convenient person to go out with when he gets back, and that he actually wants to be with you.

I am a friend

Monkey61 wrote: »

Why should summer be any different to the rest of the year? i would think that if you want to be with other people on holiday, then you probably will the rest of the year round too.

I agree and suspect its normally one of the parties idea..

Op you are young, go out and enjoy your summer and dont expect to be getting back with him in September.. Enjoy your summer, see who you meet and you may not want to get back with him when you see him again..

reprazant

Fentdog84 wrote: »

Sorry but if he really wants to contact you, he'd do so.

The same could be said of the OP.

She doesn't seem to have contracted him either.

anndub

I'm confused. Why does he have to text first? He may well be wondering why you didn't send him a farewell text!

Firetrap

I'm still scratching my head over the logic of breaking up with someone who you intend to get back with in a few months time Must be the generation gap :eek:

Anyway, it does strike me as being odd. I assume that even though you're not going out together at the moment, that you're still friends and as such, would be keeping in contact. Have you sent him a text at all? Whose idea was it to break up?