Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

how long will it take to get over him?!

  • 08-06-2011 9:20pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Obviously i know there's no answer to this, but i'm just so sick of feeling blue.
    My first proper boyfriend broke up with me last Monday. We weren't together very long, and I'm only 18, I know it wasn't forever and stuff, i'm not full of that romantic drivel, but I still feel really down about it. it's taking all my will power to not contact him, he keeps coming into my head, and i feel really blue about it :(
    how long did it take you to forget about your first boyfriend?


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭booboo88


    depends on relationship, i still talk to most of my exes..... quite good friends with most but it depends on you. if you're staying friends with hope of getting back it'll never work

    i recomend girl nights out, and in and just down time


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9 Insecure


    Mine took ages because I was engaged and living with him, with him 3 years, we still slept together a bit after so there was never any closure and I had just about gotten over him in 6 months, well I say that, I probably never did because we are together now and it made me realise no one else was enough and we never had the official goodbye because we were seeing each other in between.

    They say as a rule give 2 months for every year but that is with strictly no contact.

    I know you are young but it still hurts, it is still rejection and it sounds as if you weren't expecting it, that is what happened to me, it is HORRIBLE but it does get easier trust me. Just keep yourself busy with friends, get hobbies. The busier you are the better. Don't do what I did, getting drunk and seeing other men, it really does not work.

    I know it is hard and I really feel for you but it will get better. :) xx


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 470 ✭✭Mc Kenzie


    I know how you feel hun. with me it ended quite dramaticly and it took a long time i thaught i would never get over it. you should allow yourself to feel like this. dont try and tell yourself that your over it as you prob wont be for a while.

    its ok to think about it. its normal. But do talk spend time with freinds and family and people who really love you for you. get out and active. exercise. walking till i was knackered helps me to feel better when im upset.

    its only around now i realise im really over it and im glad. one day without noticing it will dawn on you too.

    there is a lovely song by one of my fave singers Katie Tunstall on her album eye to the telescope called "heal over" it has beuatiful and easing lyrics. i sing it all the time:) look it up. i listened to this when i was trying to "heal over":)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 101 ✭✭car.kar


    My relationship of three years ended just over a month ago - rather badly - and honeslty I'm no where near over him at all.

    Everyone's different.


  • Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,948 Mod ✭✭✭✭Neyite


    Its not even been a week yet, so give yourself time.

    Its not just about your feelings for a person - you can almost hate them when you break up but you can still miss them being around and the routine you used to have together.

    So, you need to modify your routine - make a list of things you put off or couldnt do when you had a bofriend - maybe a girlie movie at the cinema that he would not go to see, or even just go to a pub that he wasnt keen on with other friends. Hang out with that friend he thought was a bit of a headwreck but you have great fun with. Take up something new - even if its just a bit of exercise or a hobby.

    It can be hard when you miss talking to that person. If you are certain that you no longer have romantic feelings for each other there is nothing wrong with being friends - but dont kid yourself - if you could honestly see him kiss another girl at a party and feel nothing then you are ready to be friends. If you think you would still get upset at that scenario, give yourself another little while to process your feelings.

    I was given the advice to write him letters after a bad breakup by a doctor. But under no circumstances send them to him. It really helped, and within weeks reading back my letters, I could see how I was healing.


  • Advertisement
Advertisement