Is my best guy friend falling for me??

maria0707

Hi guys, really need help with this one, ive beeen really close friends with this guy for over 10 years, we have slept together on and off as long as we know each other but we both knew where we stood and it would never have been anything more. We lost contact for a bit and were not talking as much as we usually would for about a year or so as we were both in relationships which have now both ended. We are now back to being even closer but it seems different this time round, we talk every day on the phone sometimes 5 or 6 times a day and texts and have started to spend most off the weekend around each other. He says i understand him and we have slept together again but then he tells me that everyone thinks we are together and that he is only saying it to me for my sake not his in case it gets back to my ex and he gets on my case. Is he only saying this to see what i will say about what my ex would think about us getting together??
When we go out he asks my opinon on what he should wear and sounds stupid but when i tell him not to shave his hair he dosent. The minute i mention other guys he straight away starts on about other girls, is this to make me jelous, he asks what kind of guys i like and then says people tell him that he is exactly what ive described. He also gets jelous when i talk about this guy i was seeing that i really liked and tells me that im obsessed but that i should stay away from this guy until yesterday he said that i should go and get with him if i like him that much but if i did like him that much then why am i slepping with him, this is just all so confusing and i dont know what to do. Please help.

Lady von Purple

maria0707 wrote: »

this is just all so confusing and i dont know what to do. Please help.

Not to sound like a smartass, but- stop sleeping with him? Seriously though, it does sound like he may want to be more than friends. If you don't see him that way, maybe you should stop acting like you're in a relationship- you sleep together on and off, you text all day and spend weekends together, he asks for your advice on what to wear. So if he wants a relationship and you don't, you both need to take some space. No sex, less texting, less weekends together, and meeting new people. Alternatively, if you think you might like him as more than a friend- he's looking for signals, all you need to do is give him a few. Next time he asks what kind of guy you like, ask what kind of girl he likes etc. But most importantly, FB situations can be fun. But if he likes you and you don't feel the same, that's not fun, that's leading him on and you both need to take a step back. Good luck!

Sleepy

Either commit to a relationship with this chap or stop sleeping with him and have an honest conversation about what you won't be doing so any more.

maria0707

maria0707 wrote: »

Hi guys, really need help with this one, ive beeen really close friends with this guy for over 10 years, we have slept together on and off as long as we know each other but we both knew where we stood and it would never have been anything more. We lost contact for a bit and were not talking as much as we usually would for about a year or so as we were both in relationships which have now both ended. We are now back to being even closer but it seems different this time round, we talk every day on the phone sometimes 5 or 6 times a day and texts and have started to spend most off the weekend around each other. He says i understand him and we have slept together again but then he tells me that everyone thinks we are together and that he is only saying it to me for my sake not his in case it gets back to my ex and he gets on my case. Is he only saying this to see what i will say about what my ex would think about us getting together??
When we go out he asks my opinon on what he should wear and sounds stupid but when i tell him not to shave his hair he dosent. The minute i mention other guys he straight away starts on about other girls, is this to make me jelous, he asks what kind of guys i like and then says people tell him that he is exactly what ive described. He also gets jelous when i talk about this guy i was seeing that i really liked and tells me that im obsessed but that i should stay away from this guy until yesterday he said that i should go and get with him if i like him that much but if i did like him that much then why am i slepping with him, this is just all so confusing and i dont know what to do. Please help.

You sleep together, you talk an awful amount of time every day, you tell him what to do and wear, and you're confused?
Just stop - either you like him enough to commit to a relationship, or you don't - if it's the latter case then stop sleeping with him and stop talking to him so often. Even if you did just want it to be casual, the weekends and talking mean you've moved on from FWB.

Miss Fluff

I think you need to be honest with yourself here. Even your thread title is dodging the issue, Is my best guy friend falling for me?. The question is are you falling for him? It would certainly appear that way. If that's the case then you need to follow Sleepy's advice. You either need to stop sleeping with him or commit to a relationship once and for all. And to do that, you first need to address how YOU feel and then act accordingly.

maria0707

Thanks every1 for the advice, i do like him a lot he just comes with a lot of baggage and he's not the easiest guy in the world to figure out, its just running the risk of hurting the frienship if im wrong in thinking he wants more than friends.

Asphyxia

Are you sure you not going out with him already? It appears from what you are saying that you are in a relationship!

It sounds that he does have feelings for you but can you blame him, your sleeping with him and acting like a girlfriend. The best thing to do would be to sit down with him and talk to him about it. If you want a relationship go for it and if you don't you should stop sleeping with him!!!