Bored of life

LegacyUser

Hello I'm not good at these things so I'll get right to the point.

Im just finishing second year of university and I am bored with the lifestyle.
I enjoy the course and its not too bad but its such a drain on me financially and time wise.
I have feck all money to do anything and I never have days off because I'm either studying or working and if I do decided to take a day off I have to make up for it somehow. Summer is coming now but while everyone else is getting ready for a holiday I'm to busy studying and trying to find as second job so I can save up money for third year.
I'm 22 and I dont get a grant or anything and my parents can't afford to support me.

Im fed up with it. The course I'm doing is OK and it is interesting but Im bored of spending all day every ****ing day learning ****ing facts or writting reports/essays. Its interesting but I cant handle it anymore.
I love working with my hands and doing things that involve some skill and I think if I could do something like this as a hobby I'd be happy but again I either cant afford it or dont have the time.
I discussed this with the college counsellor and she said I need to sort out my time management. as far as I can see my time is managed perfectly yet I still hae no free time.

I'm losing my mind, yesterday I broke the washing machine. Subconciously I did it on purpose I think so I could justify spending a few hours trying to fix it.
I mean thats totally mad. I've started walking around at night hoping something happens, just something.
I have to study for exams today but its been so hard ust to sit there and concentrate on stuff that if I ever needed to know I could just open a book. i dont even know why im doing a degree anymore. I want a good job, thats about it.

I want something to go wrong. You've no idea how happy i would be if the flat caught fire, just so I would have something to react to.
To satisfy that urge I went to the local lifeboat station and they said they had enough volunteers (not that I would have time for the training anyway).

My girlfriend doesnt seem to understand this at all which is very frustrating, but to be honest even i dont understand it.
when i used to live at home there was always some kind of crisis or something to be fixed or some excitement. I'm now living in england to do this degree so being away from my family and friends is getting me down too. everytime i go home my parents always look much older than the last time I saw them and its very depressing considering my Dad was always very active and always out doing stupid things. He had a motorbike crash recently and he hasnt been right since.

Bloody hell this post probably makes no sense its just a big random rambling of words, i dont even know what i want from posting it here?????? but if you managed to read this far thanks

LegacyUser

If you feel you badly need a change is it possible at all that you could take a break from college for a year there or something? You could also transfer points from what you've already done to the open university and continue on there. Either way you could be out working at the same time, if you're successful in finding a job that is, and it would all seem fresh and new again. Well hopefully!

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

_sparkie_

boreeeed wrote: »

if you managed to read this far thanks

no problem, something new and exciting will come along soon enough. i know what its like in your situation.