Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Argument with Best friend

  • 31-05-2011 5:10pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hey everybody

    Last night my best friend "X" got really annoyed at her girlfriend "Y" for adding and messaging a girl on facebook and bbm who they came across on Sunday night who had the hots for "Y". The reason X got annoyed is because Y has cheated once with an ex, however X did forgive her for it even though she constantly brings it up.

    This situation caused X to call me as she so often does and tell me what was going on. My response was that she was being paranoid and I raised the point that X has in the past cheated on other girls albeit she never has on Y and that she herself messages girls who she knows are attracted to her, her defense to this comment was as always that they are her friends.

    I defended Y's right to talk to other people. Her response to me was that I have never been in a serious relationship so I couldn't really comment which she says to me all the time which caused me to get annoyed at her and said that she shouldnt have asked my advice and we both cut each other off.

    I subsequently called Y to find out what was going and she told me that X had said it was fine to add the other girl on facebook and bbm, to which I came to the conclusion that X was overreacting and in the wrong.

    I can admit that with hindsight I should have been much more tactful with how I approached the situation in the very beginning, however X is now very angry with me despite me apologising to her for my approach.

    We have not text each other since last night after she had accused me of always defending Y (which I know I do because I know people have an inability to see both angles), being a **** friend, not knowing her properly, judging her, throwing her past in her face and bitching about her with Y.

    Did I actually do the right thing in sticking up for Y??


Comments

  • #2
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 3,505 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Well "messaging" can take many different forms. X may have reason to be angry, but based solely on the info you've given here, yes she is being unreasonable. However she seems quite oblivious to the hypocritical nature of her anger, so I don't think there's much chance of getting through to her.

    You can swallow your pride, tell her you're sorry, and keep the peace, or you can stick to your guns and have her projecting all her anger onto you. Your choice really, but if you're concerned merely with who's right and wrong, then yes, she's in the wrong.


  • #3
    Chinafoot
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,894 ✭✭✭Chinafoot


    Troubled Soul wrote: »

    Did I actually do the right thing in sticking up for Y??

    Honestly, you shouldn't be sticking up for anyone. Do not get involved in the relationships of close friends because you will not be thanked for it. By all means listen to your friend and if you are asked for an opinion you should tell her that you think both of them should sit down together and talk it out.

    Call her and tell her that you don't appreciate the insults but that you don't want to fall out with her. Tell her that you want to stay out of her personal relationships in future.


Advertisement