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Friday Funnies

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  • 27-05-2011 3:24pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 8,293 ✭✭✭


    I went to the gym yesterday and said to the trainer,

    "Which machine can I use to impress that beautiful blonde over there?"

    He looked at me and replied

    "Try the cash machine outside the front door you Fat Barstool"
    _____________________

    My wife announced that she'd been sleeping with another man for the past five years.

    "Another man?" I asked.

    "Who's the first guy?"
    _____________________

    Nike are now making trainers for Lesbians.

    They're calling them Nike's 4 Dyke's,


    You get 50% more tongue and get them off with just one finger.
    _____________________

    A Scotsman has been seen walking around Glasgow with a Welly on his penis...


    The police say there's no cause for alarm as he's obviously just Fookinaboot!
    _____________________

    The thing I love most about this hot weather is the Short Skirts and Low Cut Tops.


    Although, they do make me look a bit gay.
    _____________________

    Whats blue and white and would kill you if it landed on you?


    A Fridge wearing a denim jacket.

    =(:-) Me? I know who I am. I'm a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude (-:)=



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