My first gay experience will I regret it?

blackberryguy

Hi! I am 19. I recently met a man online and we got on really well. It was my first time with a guy and the same with him. We both connected really well because we were noth inexperienced and come from simillar backgrounds and we understood each other. The thing is this man is 36. Will I regret sleeping with this man in years to come even tough I enjoyed it now?

Aard

Impossible for anyone to say. You know what things you want to do, and what things you're likely to regret.

azezil

When it comes to something like this, you're both conscenting adults you're not harming anyone by being intimate with each other and if you enjoy it what reason is there to regret it later?

Annasopra

Who knows?

To be honest - I don't see any problem at all

AndrewJD

To paraphrase Mark Twain: "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did."

Don't worry about regretting something, worry about how you feel now. Is this what you want now? Are you safe, comfortable, happy? Those are much more important.

Mr. Loverman

I would bet money this 36 year old isn't inexperienced and gets his kicks taking people's virginity.

Make him get a HIV and Hep C test before you do anything, so at least 'worst case scenario' you are just used or get a bacterial infection.

Of course, he could be a lovely fella, but you don't know him, so play it safe.

Conor30

blackberryguy wrote: »

Hi! I am 19. I recently met a man online and we got on really well. It was my first time with a guy and the same with him. We both connected really well because we were noth inexperienced and come from simillar backgrounds and we understood each other. The thing is this man is 36. Will I regret sleeping with this man in years to come even tough I enjoyed it now?

It depends how you approach it. If you enter into it just hoping for a fun night and some sexual experience, it could be a good time. But if you go into it with any romantic notions, you're very likely to be disappointed. Be careful.

Asry

LOL if it was good sex and nobody got hurt by it (unless they wanted to ) then dear god no, I don't see why you'd regret it

Endymion

Yes.

Sir Ophiuchus

Maybe. But I don't see why that would necessarily be the case. It sounds like you feel it was what you wanted and were ready for and enjoyed at the time. So why would that necessarily lead to regret?

Beruthiel

blackberryguy wrote: »

Will I regret sleeping with this man in years to come even tough I enjoyed it now?

Never regret something you enjoyed at the time.

L1011

Mr. Loverman wrote: »

Make him get a HIV and Hep C test before you do anything, so at least 'worst case scenario' you are just used or get a bacterial infection.

They're viral infections.


Realistically, nobody is going to continue having interest if you start demanding to see lab results (which take at least 5 days to get, at that). Outright asking if they know they have something and insisting on protection regardless of the answer is as safe as people are going to go

Sir Ophiuchus

MYOB wrote: »

Outright asking if they know they have something and insisting on protection regardless of the answer is as safe as people are going to go

This is the best thing to do no matter what.

AndrewJD

Nobody said he wasn't practising safe sex...

Endymion

At 36 years old, gay, single and sexually active with potentially multiple partners over a short (12 -18 months) period, getting HIV and Hep C tested should be the norm.

Essentially the point is, establish boundaries and mutually respect them. The HIV testing might be no problem, but the one off casual relationship might be.

Annasopra

AndrewJD wrote: »

Nobody said he wasn't practising safe sex...

I know - I'm not quite sure why the topic changed into safe sex advice when that's not what the op was asking for

Endymion

Johnnymcg wrote: »

I know - I'm not quite sure why the topic changed into safe sex advice when that's not what the op was asking for

Maybe as a counter point to the idea that once the sex is good, you wont regret it? Bareback sex is better sex after all. Or perhaps it was just to preach that odd form of piousness common amoung certain groupings of gays. You know, the same piousness that preaches it's OK to have a string of simultaneous lovers once you strap on.

Mr. Loverman

MYOB wrote: »

They're viral infections.

I know.

MYOB wrote: »

Realistically, nobody is going to continue having interest if you start demanding to see lab results (which take at least 5 days to get, at that). Outright asking if they know they have something and insisting on protection regardless of the answer is as safe as people are going to go

If they are both claiming to be totally inexperienced (possibly virgins) it is quite possible they will forgo protection.

As we know, our STI statistics tell us plenty of people do not practice safe sex.

TylerIE

MYOB wrote: »

They're viral infections.

Worse again - harder to clear

Realistically, nobody is going to continue having interest if you start demanding to see lab results (which take at least 5 days to get, at that). Outright asking if they know they have something and insisting on protection regardless of the answer is as safe as people are going to go

I agree in many cases, hence why he should look for tests. If the 36 year old likes the OP then he will be happy to co-operate.

Iv recently heard of yet another passing acquaintance who met someone online, 15 years older, engaged in certain "safer" activities, and ended up with a treatable but nasty STI.

Aside from the STI's a bit of it goes with the physical attractiveness.

You say you met him online, have you met him in person yet? If its gonna be a semi quickie or physical only relationship, Its possible you may regret having your first same sex fling with someone older and who didnt "turn you on". Indeed a fair few boys I know were actually freaked out by their first same sex encounter as while the gender was right, the personality was ok, there was no physical sexual attraction. One of them so much so that he didnt go near a fella again for 3 years!

Hamhide

my very first time was with a guy in his early 30's,I was 17 at the time.I'm 20 now.I've no regrets about it, it hurt and felt awesome,although the guy turned out to be a jerk the expierance was great,make sure your safe though,always

LGiamani

Hamhide wrote: »

my very first time was with a guy in his early 30's,I was 17 at the time.I'm 20 now.I've no regrets about it, it hurt and felt awesome,although the guy turned out to be a jerk the expierance was great,make sure your safe though,always

Exactly always. I recently met a guy who was doing it for the first time and he enjoyed it. I enjoyed been with a guy younger he was very young and full of life. I has a great conversation with him and we both learned from each other. IMO it made the experience more fullfilling for both of us.

L1011

lst wrote: »

I agree in many cases, hence why he should look for tests. If the 36 year old likes the OP then he will be happy to co-operate.

If you're paranoid enough to ask for tests are you paranoid enough to then insist on waiting out the infection window and getting tests again some months down the line?

Yer man isn't going to go out and get STI tests for one shag, unless he coincidentally happens to be getting them anyway / has a recent result.

Donnaghm

36 years old? Lucky fecker. Hope I'll be capable of bagging a 19 year old in 12 years time. But hope even more that I'll be in a long term relationship with someoen of my maturity level at that stage in my life.