My debut film trailer, and screening

SaucyB

hey everyone,

This is the trailer for my Debut short film 'What If?'.
http://vimeo.com/24222973

There is a screening of the film, in the sugar club in dublin on the 14th june if anyone wants to see the film.

Thanks

James

Kinky Slinky

Just commenting on the trailer I think it would be better if the music in the background was louder.

The volume of the dialogue in the trailer seems to vary too much , It quite easy to hear some parts but the part where the couple are speaking it's difficult to hear

The font you used for the text parts looks a bit basic

I think music like this would suit it better
http://youtu.be/GTkzyyv0DuA?t=32s

Sorry for being a bit of a downer

andyterryjay

I have to agree with the above comment. The movie looks great ! But the trailer seems to perhaps let it down. A stronger presence of music is always needed in a good trailer.

Good luck with the screening and the movie itself looks great

Here is the teaser trailer to my Debut Short Film, I will be entering it in youth festivals and it may be good enough to get into a full normal film festival, we shall see... haha.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-8kvr7Cxok

Kinky Slinky

andyterryjay wrote: »

I have to agree with the above comment. The movie looks great ! But the trailer seems to perhaps let it down. A stronger presence of music is always needed in a good trailer.

Good luck with the screening and the movie itself looks great

Here is the teaser trailer to my Debut Short Film, I will be entering it in youth festivals and it may be good enough to get into a full normal film festival, we shall see... haha.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-8kvr7Cxok

Just commenting on your Trailer why do you have the green slide at the start(The following preview has been approved ...) seems a bit dishonest, you don't really need it, someone going to watch your film isn't going to be worrying is its suitable for their children.

I think instead of putting an Andrew Jordan Film on the trailer it would look cool if you could make an intro and change the name to AJ Productions or something like that. It would be cool if you could make an intro something subtle enough but not over the top maybe something along the lines of a fire spelling out AJ productions and then disappearing like at the start of most films. Something really simple and elegant nothing over the top ( just a suggestion, I don't know how hard they would be to make.)
EXAMPLES
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OvVs5fuZgQk&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1kSPr2AF4o&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OoZUdzXdjI&feature=relmfu

I think when you named the people in your video it made your video look like a YouTube video instead of a trailer if you know what I mean.

Just from your trailer I honestly couldn't make out what your film was about, I think you need some dialogue, I like trailers that when you see them you think the film is going to be X and it turns out to be y. For instance when I seen the "In Bruges" trailer I thought the film was going to be a comedy but it turned out to be quite a serious film with several comic moments.

Over half your trailer seems like it has nothing to do with the film, I know it a short film but I think the It could be a bit more on topic

Every time I hear of an Irish short film they always seem to be dark films orientated around the drug/Prostitution scene, they actually never really feel that dark.

This video here ---> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1b0ShoQtZY&feature=relmfu
I seen this film maker on YouTube they usually make comedy videos but they had some project due for collage. They made this video as their project. Even in the first 7 seconds of the in and out of focus shot of the barbed wire gives this video sort of an edgy feel and the background noise of the birds gives a sense of abandonment. I think video uses some cool cinematic effects. I like how they changed from day to night at around 17s.The music in it gives it an edgy feel. I think overall this video has a dark feel.
I don’t know what it is about Irish short films but I think it’s just assumed that the film is dark if the subject matter is heavy enough. I don’t think background noise is utilised enough/correctly in most Irish short film. Even in the YouTube video when the scene was changing there was a build up of tension.

This is just my opinion, no disrespect. Take from it what you will.
Good luck with your short film

andyterryjay

Kinky Slinky wrote: »

Just commenting on your Trailer why do you have the green slide at the start(The following preview has been approved ...) seems a bit dishonest, you don't really need it, someone going to watch your film isn't going to be worrying is its suitable for their children.

I think instead of putting an Andrew Jordan Film on the trailer it would look cool if you could make an intro and change the name to AJ Productions or something like that. It would be cool if you could make an intro something subtle enough but not over the top maybe something along the lines of a fire spelling out AJ productions and then disappearing like at the start of most films. Something really simple and elegant nothing over the top ( just a suggestion, I don't know how hard they would be to make.)
EXAMPLES
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OvVs5fuZgQk&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1kSPr2AF4o&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OoZUdzXdjI&feature=relmfu

I think when you named the people in your video it made your video look like a YouTube video instead of a trailer if you know what I mean.

Just from your trailer I honestly couldn't make out what your film was about, I think you need some dialogue, I like trailers that when you see them you think the film is going to be X and it turns out to be y. For instance when I seen the "In Bruges" trailer I thought the film was going to be a comedy but it turned out to be quite a serious film with several comic moments.

Over half your trailer seems like it has nothing to do with the film, I know it a short film but I think the It could be a bit more on topic

Every time I hear of an Irish short film they always seem to be dark films orientated around the drug/Prostitution scene, they actually never really feel that dark.

This video here ---> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k1b0ShoQtZY&feature=relmfu
I seen this film maker on YouTube they usually make comedy videos but they had some project due for collage. They made this video as their project. Even in the first 7 seconds of the in and out of focus shot of the barbed wire gives this video sort of an edgy feel and the background noise of the birds gives a sense of abandonment. I think video uses some cool cinematic effects. I like how they changed from day to night at around 17s.The music in it gives it an edgy feel. I think overall this video has a dark feel.
I don’t know what it is about Irish short films but I think it’s just assumed that the film is dark if the subject matter is heavy enough. I don’t think background noise is utilised enough/correctly in most Irish short film. Even in the YouTube video when the scene was changing there was a build up of tension.

This is just my opinion, no disrespect. Take from it what you will.
Good luck with your short film

Ah i put in the green thing for a bit of fun like. haha.

I'm only 17. I make films all the time, Ill link a couple of my previous short films that would be more comedy based. You may actually like them.

I completely take on board everything you are saying. The trailer isn't meant to let you know anything about the film, it was just for my subscribers and people i know to see that it would be coming out in the near future. I left out dialogue on purpose as it would give away the whole plot. Which i do not wish to do. This is because it is a festival entry and i dont want any plagerism of my idea and theme.

A film i entered in the fresh film festival 2011 reached the top 20 of the national final, which surprised me becaues the standard was surpisingly high.

The footage you are referring to that has nothing to do with it is just footage that will be in the title credits of the film. In my eyes they are actually a metaphor in the film, adding to the overall impact of the theme.

As for the "andrew jordan film" thing. any sort of "intro" that you are referring too i wouldnt be able to make, i dont do graphics haha ! too complicated and anything i would do would be tacky.
Although i have been trying to figure out a better title than that yes.

My film has nothing to do with drugs or prostitution at least haha.

And for this new film a friend of mine is doing the whole score. The music from the trailer is the intro to the score.

Yeah that film is awesome ! Nice find. Here are a few dark enough films of mine.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnlYJmR1ocI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlOfRg0MYps

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XcAMRcKZXuU

All of these though have comedic endings and also have lifted full lines out of other scenes and cartoons. The dream one is completely based off a rugrats clip. The hell one is the lines from apocalypse now and Hot shots part deaux.

Check out my other films etc please.