did he cheat badly

janeymack1

i have a problem that wont come out of my head. i simply can't get rid of it.
my ex bf who i was madly in love with kissed a girl in a nightclub when he was drunk one night. i am a firm believer in not using "oh sorry i was drunk" as an excuse. if anything the truth comes out when drunk.
anyway my inital reaction was to forgive him but it just ate at me. i was so jealous all the time imagining him with that girl.

i also believe if he really loved me he wouldnt have kissed her. i dont just kiss any randomer on the street because it means something to me. does it not mean something to everyone?

i can't understand why the guy who i did everything for would go and be so intimate with another girl.

am i being too harsh? does he deserve a second chance?

you might say, "take him back if he promises he wont do it again and you can trust him," but he did it once and once is enough to hurt me.

how about you guys, how would you feel if your precious girlfriend/boyfriend kissed somebody else?

would you need to like somebody to kiss them (score) or not?
does everybody kiss other people now and then or is it cheating?
i always thought it was cheating more so than hugging or cuddling or anything else as it is very intimate

Console

Hi janey,
Is kissing cheating? .. yes.
Is it the same as having sex with someone else? ... Sex is more worse of an act. But kissing is still a hurtful act towards a partner. Cheating is cheating. Theres just different levels of hurtful actions.


You are in a very messy situation.
Actions are everything in life. Yet we also admit to mistakes can happen. But too often in life a person will do what they wanted to do then proclaim it to be a 'mistake' later on.

My two cents is that if anyone cheats on me? then i would kick them to the curb. The action is done. But thats just me. But you should state how you found out about your boyfriend kissing? ... because how spells out alot.

Esoteric_

I don't honestly know what I'd do in your position. The times I've been cheated on, it was sex as opposed to kissing. I would imagine that I might find it extremely difficult to forgive a partner for kissing somebody else, though, because it's still a betrayal and it's still cheating, just on a slightly different level to sex, I guess.


I don't think you really need our opinions on what we'd do, though. You're clearly extremely hurt (with good reason!) and from the sound of it you will probably struggle to trust this guy and may feel jealous/insecure. Is ANY guy worth you feeling like that, when they knew what they were causing by cheating on you and they did it anyway?

tinkerbell

I don't understand why yesterday you were posting about your current bf owing you money yet today you are talking about a previous bf cheating on you. You've clearly moved on so why do you care anymore?

IrishEyes19

was he your ex when he did this?

He's your ex, you have to move on. Im not trying to be unfair here, but you really need to stop obsessing about this this!!!!

booboo88

Once a cheat always a cheat. Drink doens't make you do things, its the person.
I've been in your situation, you wont b able to trust him again, it will niggle at you and you'll almost always feel like you have to watch who he talks to, where he goes, and its just not worth the stress

Otis Driftwood

As this is involving an ex boyfriend,and you have a new one,its not a relationship issue.

Thread closed.