Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi there,
There is an issue with role permissions that is being worked on at the moment.
If you are having trouble with access or permissions on regional forums please post here to get access: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058365403/you-do-not-have-permission-for-that#latest

Fixing a break up

  • 23-05-2011 10:05am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Long time poster but need to go annoymous for this,

    My boyfriend broke up with me last week, had inkling that he wasn't fully happy but not enough to end things so quickly without any attempt to discuss or fix anything. Especially as I asked him on numerous occassions what was wrong and was told nothing.

    Met him few days later at a mutual friend's birthday and we talked for a little bit and he wants to try see how things go and see if we can get the spark back. I am unsure how to proceed do I act like normal even though he broke my heart, do I not contact him and wait for him to contact me? I am wary as his break up was so definite at the time even though I pleaded and then three days later he changes his mind so what if he does that again?

    I don't want to just walk away, I am willing to make it work but I just don't know how I am meant to act, like his girlfriend, his ex or someone in between? Does anyone have any advice? Thank you!


Comments

  • #2
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    Forget about him, cut all contact immediately and move on with your life.

    If you have contact here and there then you're only delaying the inevitable and will cause more hurt to yourself in the long run.


  • #3
    qwerty13
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭qwerty13


    If you two are to get back together, there's a few things that need to happen:

    1) Communication needs to drastically improve!
    2) You need to know why he wanted to split up with you
    3) Whatever the reasons for breaking up were - what has changed / is different

    I don't really buy the total change of heart after 3 days thing though.


  • #4
    ash23
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,791 ✭✭✭ash23


    ???? wrote: »
    he wants to try see how things go and see if we can get the spark back



    So, what exactly is he proposing to do in order to get the spark back? Dating? Seeing other people or not? Drunken booty calls?

    If he is serious about trying then he (in my opinion) would have been clearer and you wouldn't have been left wondering.
    Are you sure he wasn't just telling you what you wanted to hear in order to get you to stop talking about it? Or was he maybe just looking to sleep with you after the party? Has he been in touch since? Were you with him that night? Was he drinking?

    I've had this too and usually it's out of guilt that it's said.


  • #5
    I am a friend
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,479 ✭✭✭I am a friend


    OP, he dumped you and then he got cold feet... He didnt like the feel of the cold single air and he is back but not even with committment, in a half hearted way....

    Do you want a half-hearted relationship? If so then get back with him. Personally, I would have too much pride to chase someone who dumped me and I would be very unavailable and he would need to jump through hoops to get me back... Dont be putty in his hands - he will have no respect for you.


Advertisement