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Not allowing guests a "+ 1" at a small wedding

  • 12-05-2011 07:56PM
    #1
    Alliandre
    Closed Accounts Posts: 129 ✭✭


    We want a small intimate wedding (around 30 people) but if we invite everyone + 1 then it suddenly isn't a small wedding anymore and there are loads of people there we don't know. Most of our friends already know each other. Would it be weird/mean if we didn't want them to bring guests? Also, how could that be phrased on an invitation?


Comments

  • #2
    Prenderb
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,560 ✭✭✭Prenderb


    Just say "John is hereby invited to the wedding" clearly naming only the person you want to go?

    If I saw only my name on an invitation, I would go alone - if OH is invited, I'd expect to see +guest, +friend, or "and name." MAybe I'm an exception?


  • #3
    krankykitty
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,518 ✭✭✭krankykitty


    I would think that too, but you'd be surprised... Some people think an invitation for "Mary and John" means Mary, John and three kids!

    However, if the invitees are all good friends, you could send out the invites simply saying "Mary" or whatever, and then explain to the friends that you were hoping for an intimate wedding, and that they would be all there as a group of friends.


  • #4
    janbaby
    Closed Accounts Posts: 234 ✭✭janbaby


    we're in the same boat so we just put the one name on the invite. I'm hoping people realise this means its just them and not a guest!


  • #5
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,978 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    We decided not to have +1s either because our families are huge as it is, on the invitations we just put 'Jane' or 'Joe' for the people who we were inviting on their own and nobody came back to ask if they could bring a guest or ended up bringing them unanounced on the day. The only ones who we invited on their own were friends and work colleagues who we sat together anyway so they all knew each other. I definitely don't think it's mean, you have to draw the line somewhere and if you want a small intimate wedding then you have to be mindful of numbers.


  • #6
    Daisy!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 369 ✭✭Daisy!


    We won't be having +1's either except for the partners of our guests that we're quite friendly with so they're our friends anyway. If you want a small wedding asking +1's will just double the guest list and defeat the purpose of a small wedding in the first place. Just make sure they know if it's just their name on the invite that it's just them invited, I've heard of partners showing up to weddings uninvited in the past - my own sister's wedding included. It was extremely awkward.


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