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getting over past - social outcast

  • 12-05-2011 7:07pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi all. This is a bit of an embarrassing thing. But I can't get along with other people. I keep away before I get a chance to be judged. I don't let people near me because I Was bullied severely through primary and secondary school but couldn't tell anyone.

    I grew up with 3brothers and 2 sisters. We couldn't afford creches or sports coaching etc so most of the time we played together. We weren't allowed out of the house because we lived in a bad area until I was 8. My parents got the money together for a mortgage so we moved to this place. While the mortgage and bills were high parents did their best. But the neighbours called the police all the time because they said we were in their gardens etc (we had accents they didn't like) so our mother made us stay in. My brothers made goal posts out of wood to put on the green area to play football and the neighbours dismantled them saying we destroyed the green area and typed up a fake letter from the council saying they'd take legal action if my parents didn't obey the code of the area we would be petitioned to leave.... So parents ignored that as solicitor said that there was no indication of where the letter came from, nothing could be done. we had to stay in and play in the garden.

    At school I Got jeered because I wore my brothers and sisters' old shoes/tshirts/uniforms etc. I was a bit of a tomboy too. Was called "raggedy ann" and other names etc. about my clothes / hair/ second hand everything.

    Now I find it hard to meet people. I've this stigma attached to me. And when I'm out. Sometimes I get paranoid because when I'm near women they grab their bags. And I think they think I'm trying to rob them. I walk fast past people and make no eye contact.

    I'm still a social outcast and I'm finding it really really difficult.
    I went to counselling and all he said was "your group of people is out there, it will be a while but you will find them"... Should I keep up with counselling or is anyone just like this forever?


Comments

  • #2
    Kanoe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,522 ✭✭✭Kanoe


    I'm not really sure in what context the comment was made, sounds a bit weird for a counsellor to say something like that :o but maybe you might find something like this helpful?

    [edit;I just hit the first link I found on google, you might find something else on the topic if you have a look]


  • #3
    mikemac
    Closed Accounts Posts: 19,969 ✭✭✭✭mikemac


    bringmealong wrote: »
    At school I Got jeered because I wore my brothers and sisters' old shoes/tshirts/uniforms etc.

    So did children in every classroom in the 1980's :)
    Wearing hand me downs just seems normal to me and to many others I would think too

    What is it about your appearance do you think that might trigger ladies you pass to feel nervous?
    Do you have any information on this? I'm not saying you're imagining it but if it's something you focus on, well it's like you're almost expecting it to happen


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