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The Onionator has lost his touch

  • 12-05-2011 6:50pm
    #1
    whiteonion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 837 ✭✭✭


    Last weekend I was making out with three different girls in a bar I went to. Now you would say, good going. For me this is quite normal but what bothers me is no one wanted to follow me for the sexy time. What has happened. Have I lost my touch? Usually making out implies a sexy time.


Comments

  • #2
    Biggins
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    whiteonion wrote: »
    Last weekend I was making out with three different girls in a bar I went to. Now you would say, good going. For me this is quite normal but what bothers me is no one wanted to follow me for the sexy time. What has happened. Have I lost my touch? Usually making out implies a sexy time.
    They have previously seen the quality of your threads and discovered who you was!


  • #3
    Jaxxy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,297 ✭✭✭Jaxxy


    Maybe you're a ****e kisser, and the thought of you slobbering elsewhere on their naked bodies made them lose their moisty wide-ons.


  • #4
    hondasam
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,418 ✭✭✭✭hondasam


    whiteonion wrote: »
    Last weekend I was making out with three different girls in a bar I went to. Now you would say, good going. For me this is quite normal but what bothers me is no one wanted to follow me for the sexy time. What has happened. Have I lost my touch? Usually making out implies a sexy time.

    you can't lose what you never had !


  • #5
    Mena
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,180 ✭✭✭Mena


    Licking the door to the gents in a pub does not equate to making out with a girl, let a lone 3.


  • #6
    KeithM89_old
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,806 ✭✭✭✭KeithM89_old


    You may have thought it was 3 different girls, but she was just really, really fat.


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  • #7
    kfallon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,775 ✭✭✭✭kfallon


    You prob said 'no' to sneaky fingers being allowed, that was your first and most fatal mistake!

    They are the future of the bedroom 'Olympics'


  • #8
    hondasam
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,418 ✭✭✭✭hondasam


    KeithM89 wrote: »
    You may have thought it was 3 different girls, but she was just really, really fat.

    maybe he did have sexy time but felt nothing!


  • #9
    ballsymchugh
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,939 ✭✭✭ballsymchugh


    maybe it's the stink of onions off you?


  • #10
    deathrider
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,699 ✭✭✭deathrider


    People actually say "making out"?


  • #11
    whiteonion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 837 ✭✭✭whiteonion


    deathrider wrote: »
    People actually say "making out"?
    That is the way I was taught English.


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  • #12
    deathrider
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,699 ✭✭✭deathrider


    whiteonion wrote: »
    That is the way I was taught English.

    Are you sure? Because it seems more like you were taught American.


  • #13
    whiteonion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 837 ✭✭✭whiteonion


    deathrider wrote: »
    Are you sure? Because it seems more like you were taught American.
    As far as I know American-English is a set of dialects of the English language.


  • #14
    Kevin Duffy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,439 ✭✭✭Kevin Duffy


    Making out with the ladies in The George doesn't work out for everyone.


  • #15
    Captain_Generic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,408 ✭✭✭Captain_Generic


    You split the rohypnol into thirds


  • #16
    whiteonion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 837 ✭✭✭whiteonion


    All these girls let me feel them up on the dance floor.


  • #17
    Biggins
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 34,567 ✭✭✭✭Biggins


    whiteonion wrote: »
    All these girls let me feel them up on the dance floor.
    Leave the ten year olds alone!


  • #18
    mattjack
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    maybe the smell of slash off ya put them off..other peoples slash..


  • #19
    cml387
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,642 ✭✭✭cml387


    whiteonion wrote: »
    Last weekend I was making out with three different girls in a bar I went to. Now you would say, good going. For me this is quite normal but what bothers me is no one wanted to follow me for the sexy time. What has happened. Have I lost my touch? Usually making out implies a sexy time.


    You are Disco Mikki!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1_OMVI_ri0


  • #20
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,919 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    JaxxYChicK wrote: »
    Maybe you're a ****e kisser, and the thought of you slobbering elsewhere on their naked bodies made them lose their moisty wide-ons.

    I like the cut of your gib!


  • #21
    ArtyM
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,879 ✭✭✭ArtyM


    I reckon your chances died the moment you used the phrase 'sexy time'.
    Thats gotta be up there with 'syphillis' in the list of phrases a woman would consider sexy.
    Makes you sound like Disco Stu's dutch uncle.


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  • #22
    The Left Hand Of God
    Closed Accounts Posts: 413 ✭✭The Left Hand Of God


    "Moisty wide-ons"

    Well, I certainly learned something new today. :)


  • #23
    whiteonion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 837 ✭✭✭whiteonion


    I even wated my A material when I whispered the following into the ears of one girl: "We are like fire tonight".


  • #24
    krudler
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 34,788 ✭✭✭✭krudler


    whiteonion wrote: »
    All these girls let me feel them up on the dance floor.

    was that before or after you were skidding around in your socks?


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