Keeping neat and tidy... down there

PhoneMeASAP

Erm, this is just a general question, but in people's experiences, is it normal for girls to shave and be tidy "down there"? My long term ex did have it tidy, short and neat which I loved, I had no problems adventuring down there if you get me. I’ve been on the singles market for a few months now and every girl I've been with has been wild and natural... Is that just the norm nowadays??? I keep myself trimmed and tidy.

This may seem insensitive to some but it is a personal issue for me, I find the natural look extremely off-putting and can feel physically sick. Its a deal breaker for me tbh. There's this girl I'm seeing at the moment for instance, great sweet girl but when things heat up I just feel like going home, it’s a complete and utter turn off I don't know, maybe it’s just what I expect? My ex, with whom I was with for years was my first and really my only experience until a few months ago and as I said, she kept herself very tidy

trio

It's ridiculous to try to generalise. Every woman has a different attitude to her personal grooming.

But here in Ireland many don't feel they have to do a great deal of "gardening", as long as they are obviously clean. Or feel they should have to.

You have a personal taste and I'm not knocking it. You're entitled to it. But your search for what you like may be a bit longer than if you lived in other parts of the world, that's all.

Some do, some don't. There is an age aspect too. You say your ex was your first. It's possible if you're young that some of these girls haven't had many sexual experiences either, and to be honest a lot of girls take time to realise that there is a fashion aspect these things. I certainly never did anything with mine until I was sexually active, because it had just never occurred to me before. That said, even after realising there is a fashion aspect, some girls are more comfortable having it natural. Some like it that way, but also some girls have bad reactions to shaving/creams/waxing down there. They're entitled to wear it whatever way they like.

However your taste is your personal taste and if you feel this is a deal braker, then I suppose it's just going to have to be a deal braker. But to answer your question of is it normal to be shaved and tidy, yes, it's normal to be shaved and tidy, but it's also normal to be natural. Neither is out of the ordinary. If I were you, I'd give it a go anyway, as it's just something you're not used to. You could get used to it, and it would save you having to break it off with girls that don't suit your taste. Taste changes.

LegacyUser

Hi OP think the others posters are spot on. Somebody who is less experienced may not realise that to some men it is a turn off.
If you know each other well enough to get intimate then perhaps just mention that you love to see a woman neater down below.
However some men have a thing for the very bald little girl look....very creepy TBH.
Not saying you do but one man said this to me and I dropped him like a stone , I am a woman not a child.
It is down to personal taste as others have said. But a woman who doesn't "garden" cannot expect oral sex IMO.

PhoneMeASAP

However some men have a thing for the very bald little girl look....very creepy TBH

Never experienced it and dont have any desire to either. See my ex did "garden" and it was neat, very short and tidy and its just something I'm used to and like. I had no problem giving oral pleasure. Every girl Ive come across since though, Ive just had to walk away. Like how do you say it to a women? They are fully entitled to have it the way they want, I would never attempt to tell/demand them to change it, but what can you say without 1) offending them and 2) not come across as a pr1ck?? Is it better off just saying silent and walking away??

But a woman who doesn't "garden" cannot expect oral sex IMO

And I can say I have absolutlely no desire to when the opportunity arisess!

Their entitled to wear it whatever way they like.

Absolutely, as I said I would never demand that they change it. Its simply just not my taste.

LeixlipRed

A woman who doesn't garden can't expect oral sex can she not? What about from a man who doesn't mind that sort of thing? Assuming she's clean and hygienic then she can expect whatever she wants from someone who's willing. It's not my personal preference but to suggest what you're suggesting is insulting.

AvaKinder

It's very much a personal preference thing but you should be able to discuss if it's someone you're seeing regularly. My (male) ex preferred it completely natural, and used to complain when I tidied it up abit (just trimming no shaving) but the girl I'm seeing now seems to prefer it very short/shaved but it has taken me awhile to find something that works as I react quite badly to shaving and can only use the creams now.

You should just try to broach to in a tactful way if it's someone you hope to continue seeing.

sporina

if you are seeing someone who you like, and you get on well with her, then perhaps you should say it to her in a light hearted way.

Like the others say, when young, one may not know that their garden should be maintained..

The girl will not be offended if you say it to her in the right way.. she may even thank you for it..

LegacyUser

mmm. not sure about this one.

Some women are very hirsute by nature down there. Even if she trims it it may seem like a wild garden to someone not used to this.

Waxing is very expensive, and painful. Shaving lasts for a day and then its about 10 days of the itchy and scratchy show. The hair removal creams smell vile and tend to have similar results to shaving.

If it turns you off, it turns you off. But, have you considered many Irish women are very hairy naturally down there, and to tease, wax, coax, trim and render it passible for a man may be a bit much?

Maybe if it is a bit much for you, then you should accept that if you aren't going down on her, she should not be encouraged to go down on you, regardless of your garden.

LegacyUser

I’ve been on the singles market for a few months now and every girl I've been with has been wild and natural... Is that just the norm nowadays??? I keep myself trimmed and tidy.

Every girl Ive come across since though, Ive just had to walk away.

OP personally (i'm a woman) if i'm not seeing someone, i do sometimes let it go a bit wild, out of sheer laziness to be honest (although i'd never do that if i was seeing someone). Are you meeting these women as just a one night stand kind of a thing? Women are less likely to go out looking for a ONS and sometimes it just kinda happens when you're not expecting it and you find yourself in the situation where you're like 'crap i wasn't expecting this, uh oh i haven't tidied up down there in a while', maybe if you were dating these women for a few weeks you might find they'd have tidied up a bit by the next time you were to sleep with them?

I definitely wouldn't say it was the norm to be wild and bushy (among my friends anyway 24-30 age group.), (i'm not knocking anyone's personal taste or preference, just from talking to my own friends it seems most are tidy at least down there)

There's this girl I'm seeing at the moment for instance, great sweet girl but when things heat up I just feel like going home, it’s a complete and utter turn of

Maybe it's just a coincidence this girl likes the natural look, If you've been going out with her for a while and are having regular sex, then it's perfectly fine to tell her that you prefer her to be tidy down there, it's not a big deal, she won't know what your preference is unless you tell her.

She either takes it on board and trims or she doesn't, if its the former happy days, if it's the latter well then you know you're just not going to be sexually compatible and can move on.

LegacyUser

I would generally keep myself tidy but as the previous poster said if you're not expecting to be meeting a man you might be between trimmings!

I would say though that if a guy ever told me to runway or remove it all he would be ****ed right out the door without a second thought. It's a womans business how she wants to look and tbh it's quite offensive how in this age of pornography women men expect us to look like the actresses and not like real women. I was asked it once by a guy who himself resembled a gorilla.

One way to get your partner to tidy would be to suggest you do it together? Some might find that gross but I'm sure some would enjoy it.

And for all the guys out there, ffs, practice what you preach. Girls don't like rummaging around the forest either.